Letter to Julia 20110901

Hi Julia! Did you miss me? I certainly miss you. You and your gorgeous body. Did you enjoy the holidays? Oh, you had to work? Poor Julia! I've just been lazing around watching TV, playing Krush, Kill & Destroy, and working on the yard. You know, living in a bubble, an adolescent fantasy world. It's been raining so much. The rain finally stopped when the fasting month ended, but the pile of leaves to burn is now as tall as me, and it's still wet.

As you know, I didn't really do much to celebrate the Eid, because I much prefer Ramadan. I went for the prayer at 8:30 in the morning... too early! I usually sleep in until 10:00am. The next morning (Independence Day), I took my Dad to visit the grave of his parents, or my grandparents. Chee Cheah wouldn't let me forget the appointment. At 3:00am, she started howling and banging on my bedroom door. She went, "Yowl! Yowl!" BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM "Yowl! Yowl!" BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM. I didn't know a cat could hammer on a door like that.

But it is not sorcery. It is odd that people would believe in sorcery over God. Sorcery is forbidden in Islam. Allah is the One who arranges all affairs. Certainly, I feel unhappy that I can't afford my Julia, but I must be patient and constant. Besides, if I'm supposed to wear high fashion name brand clothes onstage, then that shouldn't be my expense! I would be happy enough to wear a tattered old sarong with no shirt or shoes, and in theory everyone else would start dressing that way (actually they already do around these here parts). It's OK for a man to be butt-ugly, isn't it? So, don't be holding out your shoe for me to wear, because I don't pass anymore! How annoying. Yes, I feel unhappy that I can't afford my Julia right now. I work for Allah, and my life conveys a message, again that Allah is the One who arranges all affairs.

Qur'an 20110901

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

9. If we give man a taste of mercy from Ourselves, and then withdraw it from him, behold! He is in despair and blasphemy!

10. But if We give him a taste os favors after adversity has touched him, he is sure to say, "All evil has departed from me." Behold! He falls into exultation and pride!

11. Not so do those who show patience and constancy, and work righteousness: for them is forgiveness, and a great reward.

12. Perchance you may give up a part of what is revealed to you, and your heart feels straightened lest they say, "Why is not a treasure sent down to him, or why does not an angel come down with him?" But you are there only to warn! It is Allah that arranges all affairs!

13. Or they may say, "He forged it." Say, "Bring you then 10 Surahs forged like it, and call whomsoever you can, other than Allah, if you speak the truth."

14. If then they answer you not, know you that this Revelation is sent down with the Knowledge of Allah, and that there is no god but God! Will you even then submit?

15. Those who desire the life of the present and its glitter, to them We shall pay their deeds therein, without diminution.

16. They are those for whom there is nothing in the hereafter but the fire. Vain are the designs they frame therein, and of no effect are the deeds that they do!

Hud 11:9-16
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Bring you then 10 Surahs forged like it, and call whomsoever you can, other than Allah, if you speak the truth.

Letter to Julia 20110827

Tsk tsk tsk, you naughty girl. Don't you go and say stuff like that about God. Now please bend over, I'm going to have to spank you with a blade of grass. Always remember that I love God no matter what anyone says, and God has been my only friend, in many different situations over and over and over again. I appreciate that you may be impatient with the lack of miracles that would materialize our love and marriage (namely my being rich enough to afford Julia), but it could be that your scope has failed to notice certain nuances that are beyond human control. Only God has the Power and the Subtlety to give reckoning to those who harm children. Those in power use their power to stay in power, even if it means eradicating the influence of children. What does this have to do with us? We are a marriage between music and fashion. And children love music, and are too innocent to profiteer, whereas the adults generally fear the pharoah. But I'm sure these modern day pharoahs are actually really nice guys, who have absolutely no selfish intent of maintaining personal glory, and what better way of serving the community than to exert control on the children? Besides, they could always claim that whatever I'm writing here is strictly conjecture, and that God is merely a thing.

So please don't be in such a hurry. Please have faith in God, please be patient, and maintain your prayers in sincerity. We don't want to rush. Take it slow Julia, relax, sleep on it, work towards it slowly, slow things down. When we get there together, our goal is to slow things down even more, so we can enjoy our love and life together. How can you expect a marriage to last in the fast lane? You've seen that mountain of gold, haven't you? The mountain of gold that rises from the dried-up river of emotions? Where people kill each other to partake of it? It will be literal, my love. So, we don't want to rush the Great War (no, not World War I), where the 2 giant armies will have the same grievance: most likely poverty. We don't want to rush Judgement Day. We want to slow things down, and try to taste some happiness with each other while we are stuck in this imperfect world. If we are destined for each other, then God will bring us together. Just relax, be patient, and work as comfortably as possible with what God has given you.

As I told you before, I won't get another chance to blog my love to you again until after the Eid/Independence Day holidays, which will be about Thursday, insyaAllah. Did you try fasting? Most people make such a big deal about the Eid. I love the fasting month much, much more than the Eid. Sure I can fast almost any other time, but it's not the same as Ramadan, and it's not just about the fasting either. Anyway, please forgive me for not writing again until at least next Thursday.

Meanwhile, how about you watch this episode of "The Littlest Hobo?" Muslims aren't supposed to own dogs. I think the moisture from dogs and pigs interfere with worship to Allah. Don't ask why, just wear disposable gloves! But this dog just makes me want to sob. Notice how the humans left the dog to die after it had saved their daughter. They didn't even try! I love this dog so much, ya Allah! If I were allowed to have a dog, it would be just like London.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eqkTCyWzcSk

Qur'an 20110827

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

101. Say, "Behold all that is in the heavens and on earth." But neither Signs nor Warners profit those who believe not.

102. Do they then expect but the days of the men who passed away before them? Say, "Wait you then, for I too will wait with you."

103. In the end We deliver Our messengers and those who believe. Thus it is fitting on Our part that We should deliver those who believe!

104. Say, "O humankind! If you are in doubt as to my religion, I worship not what you worship other than Allah! But I worship Allah, who will take your souls. I am commanded to be of the believers."

105. And further, set your face towards Religion with true piety, and never in anywise be of the unbelievers.

106. Nor call on any other than Allah, such will neither profit you, nor harm you, If you do, behold! You shall certainly be of those who do wrong.

107. If Allah does touch you with hurt, there is none can remove but God. If God does design some benefit for you, there is none can keep back God's favor. God causes it to reach whomsoever of God's servants God pleases. And God is the Oft-Forgiving, most Merciful.

108. Say, "O humankind! Now Truth has reached you from your Lord! Those who receive Guidance, do so for the good of their own souls. Those who stray, do so to their own loss, and I am not over you to arrange your affairs."

Jonah 10:101-108
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Behold all that is in the heavens and on earth.

Wait you then, for I too will wait with you.

O humankind! If you are in doubt as to my religion, I worship not what you worship other than Allah! But I worship Allah, who will take your souls. I am commanded to be of the believers.

O humankind! Now Truth has reached you from your Lord! Those who receive Guidance, do so for the good of their own souls. Those who stray, do so to their own loss, and I am not over you to arrange your affairs.

Letter to Julia 20110824

Hey Julia, do you drive a car? I was taking Chee Cheah to the vet on Monday for an antifungal shot in my parents' car, and I noticed that the traffic was particularly evil that day. Vehicles were making the wrong turn signal then swerving, cars were speeding up then stopping, people were trying to cut me off when the traffic was frozen... a lot of them too, were doing the same thing over and over again! I was thinking, "They can't all be this stupid." Maybe they were too busy shopping for the Eid, and nothing else mattered? Traffic is unpredictable in general, but there were just too many morons on the road than usual that day. And it's not the same on motorcycle: I drive reeeeally slowly, and there is more room to manuever as opposed to a car. Then it occured to me: they're doing it on purpose! Somehow these idiots must think that I have a lot of money, and they were trying to make some extra cash. I hope I'm wrong about this, but if this is true, then what is happening to me must be happening to you. I hope you're not driving yourself around in a car, especially in the city. Please use a bicycle instead.

I think it was Kurt Cobain who said, "Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they're not after you." Haha! Just because they have no faith, doesn't mean that God isn't going to kick their asses. Anyway, it seems that the fasting month is nearly over! The Eid (which is a public holiday here), which marks the end of Ramadan the fasting month, should fall on the 30th of August this year. Incidentally, Independence Day for Malaysia is on the 31st of August. I bring this up because I don't have an internet connection at home, and have to publish my love letter to my beloved Julia and my Qur'an blog at the internet cafe, which may or may not be open on those holidays. If I had an internet cafe, I would be open because the kids would be loaded during this Muslim holiday season. Added to the holidays issue, I am currently under a very oppressive financial situation, even 50 cents a blog is too much for me, so I have to cram the pourings of my heart to my sweetie and my Qur'an blog as compactly and conveniently as possible. If you have been reading my Qur'an blog then this is not a good thing. This time, 22 verses from the chapter titled "Jonah" is way too much, and I apologize for doing so. Julia, if you are studying the Qur'an, you must do it very slowly. But anyway, please forgive me if I fail to blog this love letter during the Eid and Independence Day holiday span. Do know that you are my girl, and I love you.

People in general find it hard to swallow my spiritual agenda, to please Allah with music. They gloat at my poverty, and plot to make me public property. But I haven't asked them for anything. My reward is due only from Allah, I submit to Allah's Will, and I am a servant of Allah.

Qur'an 20110824

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

48. They say, "When will this promise come to pass, if you speak the truth?"

49. Say, "I have no power over any harm or profit to myself except as Allah Wills. To every people is a term appointed. When that term is reached, not an hour can they cause delay, nor can they advance."

50. Say, "Do you see, if God's punishment should come to you by night or by day, what portion of it would the sinners wish to hasten?"

51. Would you believe in it at last, when it actually comes to pass? Ah, now? And you wanted to hasten it on!

52. At length will be said to the wrongdoers, "Taste you the enduring punishment! You get but the recompense of what you earned!"

53. They seek to be informed by you, "Is that true?" Say, "Aye! By my Lord, it is the very truth! And you cannot frustrate it!"

54. Every soul that has sinned, if it possessed all that is on earth, would fain give it in ransom. They would declare their repentance when they see the Penalty. But the judgement between them will be with justice, and no wrong will be done unto them.

55. Is it not that to Allah belongs whatever is in the heavens and on earth? Is it not that Allah's promise is assuredly true? Yet most of them understand not.

56. It is God Who gives life, and Who takes it, and to God shall you all be brought back.

57. O humankind! There has come to you a direction from your Lord, and a healing for that in your hearts, and for those who believe, a Guidance and a Mercy.

58. Say, "In the Bounty of Allah, and in God's Mercy: in that let them rejoice." That is better than what they hoard.

59. Say, "See you what things Allah has sent down to you for sustenance? Yet you hold some things forbidden, others lawful." Say, "Has Allah indeed permitted you, or do you invent to attribute to Allah?"

60. And what think those who invent lies against Allah of the Day of Judgement? Verily Allah os full of bounty to humankind, but most of them are ungrateful.

61. In whatever business you may be, and whatever portion you may be reciting from the Qur'an, and whatever deed you may be doing, We are Witness thereof when you are deeply engrossed therein. Nor is hidden from your Lord the weight of an atom on the earth or in the heavens, and not the least and not the greatest of these things but are recorded in a clear Record.

62. Behold! Verily on the friends of Allah there is no fear, nor shall they grieve.

63. Those who believe and guard against evil,

64. For them are glad tidings in the life of the present and in the hereafter. No change can there be in the Words of Allah. This is indeed the supreme Felicity.

65. Let not their speech grieve you, for all power and honor belong to Allah. It is God who Hears and Knows.

66. Behold! Verily to Allah belong all creatures in the heavens and on earth. What, do they follow who worship as God's "partners" other than Allah? They follow nothing but fancy, and they do nothing but lie.

67. God it is that has made for you the night that you may rest therein, and the day to make things visible. Verily in this are Signs for those who listen.

68. They say, "Allah has begotten a son!" Glory be to God! God is Self-Sufficient! To God are all things in the heavens and on earth. No warrant have you for this! Say you about Allah what you know not?

69. Say, "Those who invent a lie against Allah will never prosper."

70. A little enjoyment in this world! And then, to Us will be their return. Then shall We make them taste the severest Penalty for their blasphemies.

Jonah 10:48-70
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I have no power over any harm or profit to myself except as Allah Wills. To every people is a term appointed. When that term is reached, not an hour can they cause delay, nor can they advance.

Do you see, if God's punishment should come to you by night or by day, what portion of it would the sinners wish to hasten?

Aye! By my Lord, it is the very truth! And you cannot frustrate it!

In the Bounty of Allah, and in God's Mercy: in that let them rejoice.

See you what things Allah has sent down to you for sustenance? Yet you hold some things forbidden, others lawful.

Has Allah indeed permitted you, or do you invent to attribute to Allah?

Those who invent a lie against Allah will never prosper.

Letter to Julia 20110822

No, that couldn't have been my first spiritual moment, but it was certainly distinct, that it sticks out in my mind. Life is full of spiritual moments that we miss because we are so consumed with ourselves- I believe it's called arrogance. It happens to all of us, always in a big hurry to get nowhere. I don't consider myself to be more elevated than anyone else. The best we can be my love, is on the edge.

As you know, my grandfather's house is right next door to mine. It has been abandoned ever since he passed away. It looks like it could be haunted, in fact I saw some verses of the Qur'an pinned to walls of some closets there- specifically verse 255 of "The Heifer", a very famous verse used to ward off jinns. I have that verse memorised, and I have had many encounters with jinns, but I put my fear in Allah, so I'm not too worried. Anyway, I told you about the ancient amra tree by my front gate, which also happens to be the front gate of my grandfather's house. My parents wanted me to clear out some vines there which were climbing up the old tree. However, these vines were getting leverage from some smaller trees on the ground, so all of it had to be cleared out. Some of those tress have been there for decades, so it isn't an easy chore for me. Added to that, my grandfather put up some construction there which includes steel rods, barbed wire, bricks, rocks and shattered concrete, plus some ancient trash like an oil lamp and the skeleton of a foot-driven sewing machine. What's my point? There is no point, except Allah. But those who do not understand become enemies, simply for the reason that they do not understand. Their minds become limited by their own desire, which they desire not to abandon.

Meanwhile, I found some young mangos of the high quality kind, so I transplanted them over to my side. I think my side of the compound is going to be filled with fruit trees, insyaAllah. When they mature in about 10 years or so, you can help me set up a stall by the side of the road, and we can sell mangos and chilled cashews. We can sell honey-roasted cashew nuts for extra expensive! With your beauty, we could attract millions of patrons to our roadside stall. You can help me wash the roasted cashew nuts in detergent, and crack them open with a hammer. Please wear gloves! I wish I could plant strawberries here. Sigh! Sometimes I miss the 4 seasons.

Qur'an 20110822

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

31. Say, "Who is it that sustains you from the sky and from the earth? Or who is it that has power over hearing and sight? And who is it that brings out the living from the dead, and the dead from the living? And who is it that rules and regulates all affairs?" They will soon say, "Allah." Say, "Will you not then show piety?"

32. Such is Allah, your real Cherisher and Sustainer. Apart from Truth, what but error? How then are you turned away?

33. Thus is the Word of your Lord proved true against those who rebel. Verily they will not believe.

34. Say, "Of your 'partners', can any originate creation and repeat it?" Say, "It is Allah Who originates creation and repeats it. Then how are you deluded away?"

35. Say, "Of your 'partners' is there any that can give guidance towards Truth?" Say, "It is Allah Who gives guidance towards Truth. Is then God Who gives guidance to Truth more worthy to be followed, or he who finds not guidance unless he is guided? What then is the matter with you? How judge you?"

36. But most of them follow nothing but fancy: truly fancy can be of no avail against Truth. Verily Allah is well aware of all that they do.

37. This Qur'an is not such as can be produced by other than Allah. On the contrary, it is a confirmation of what went before it, and a fuller explanation of the Book, wherein there is no doubt, from the Lord of the Worlds.

38. Or do they say, "He forged it"? Say, "Bring then a Surah like unto it, and call anyone you can, besides Allah, if it be you speak the truth!"

39. No, they charge with falsehood that whose knowledge they cannot compass, even before the elucidation thereof reached them. Thus did those before them make charges of falsehood. But see what was the end of those who did wrong!

40. Of them, there are some who believe therein, and some who do not. And your Lord knows best those who are out for mischief.

41. If they charge you with falsehood say, "My work to me, and yours to you! You are free from responsibility for what I do, and I for what you do!"

Jonah 10:31-41
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Who is it that sustains you from the sky and from the earth? Or who is it that has power over hearing and sight? And who is it that brings out the living from the dead, and the dead from the living? And who is it that rules and regulates all affairs?

Will you not then show piety?

Of your 'partners', can any originate creation and repeat it?

It is Allah Who originates creation and repeats it. Then how are you deluded away?

Of your 'partners' is there any that can give guidance towards Truth?

It is Allah Who gives guidance towards Truth. Is then God Who gives guidance to Truth more worthy to be followed, or he who finds not guidance unless he is guided? What then is the matter with you? How judge you?

Bring then a Surah like unto it, and call anyone you can, besides Allah, if it be you speak the truth!

My work to me, and yours to you! You are free from responsibility for what I do, and I for what you do!

Letter to Julia 20110820

Letter to Julia 20110820

Oh, laundry. I don't like to do laundry, but it must be done. I remember hauling my laundry to the laundromat on my bicycle. It was a girl's bicycle, with 2 baskets at the back. I think I was on my way back from doing my laundry when I had my first distinct spiritual moment. I was pedaling slowly, when I saw what I thought was Janis Joplin coming out of the convenience store. I went to take a closer look, so I followed her to the traffic light. She must have been about 19 years old, and she looked exactly like Janis: body, face, hair, clothes and all! I stopped at the light while she crossed the road, and she glanced back at me with a nervous look, and lit a cigarette. I didn't mean to scare her, I was just stunned at the her appearance. As I was temporarily paralyzed at the crossing, another girl nearly ran into me on a bicycle that was identical to mine. She looked exactly like Karen Carpenter! She was about 19, and she wore glasses like mine. She grinned at me as she rode away. I turned to look at Janis, but she was gone. Then I turned to see Karen again, but she had disappeared.

But, laundry. My Mom gave me a washer, but I don't have a dryer. I set up the washer in the same room I take a shower in. Well actually, I use a rubber hose to squirt myself down with. There is a shower head connected to an electric water heater, but the climate is too hot for me anyway, so I never use it. I suppose I have to install a shower enclosure, with sliding glass doors. I hope you aren't the type who likes long, hot baths: I have so much trouble trying to cool down around here, and I figure hot baths would play havoc with your body. Lately there's been one of those huge brown spiders hanging out in my shower/laundry room. This one is about 5 inches across, with 7 legs, and seems to be nursing some young in a tightly packed web case which she carries with her mandibles, pinning it to her stomach. Spiders rule around here, so I'm kind of like her bodyguard. I hope you like spiders, too. I dry my clothes on a line I set up inside the house, in a corner of the room where my kitchen is. I don't dry my clothes outside because I usually do my laundry at night, and there are a lot of bugs outside. I don't have many clothes, and the clothes I do have are very humble indeed. I don't even use a flat iron. Totally unlike James Bond, huh? I lost a lot of my interest in clothes ever since my body lost its femininity. Darn those drums.

Yes, laundry. Obviously, I will need to get a washer and dryer specifically for your use. There are dry cleaners downtown, but I have never used them. I hardly ever see anyone immaculately dressed around here. Maybe it's too hot, or maybe they just don't really care. My Dad takes much pride in his clothes, but even he seems to be putting less effort in his wardrobe lately. I hope I'm not putting a bad influence on him. Even if I had the money, it's too hot to wear tailored suits around here. And there's nothing more comfortable than the ripped-up cargo pants I wear for gardening. Chee Cheah has much contempt for my wardrobe. Well, she used to be my Dad's cat: she even looks like my Dad. The other day, she peed in the corner where I hang up my wet clothes. I guess I would try a little harder to match up with Julia. I do want to keep my wardrobe WAY smaller than yours.

Qur'an 20110820

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

15. But when Our Clear Signs are rehearsed unto them, those who rest not their hope on their meeting with Us say, "Bring us a Qur'an other than this, or change this." Say, "It is not of my own accord to change it. I follow nothing but what is revealed unto me. If I were to disobey my Lord, I should myself fear the Penalty of a Great Day."

16. Say, "If Allah had so willed, I should not have rehearsed it to you, or would God have made it known to you. A whole lifetime before this have I tarried among you: will you not then understand?"

17. Who does more wrong than such as forge a lie against Allah, or deny God's Signs. But never will prosper those who sin.

18. They serve, besides Allah, things that hurt them not, nor profit them, and they say, "These are our intercessors with Allah." Say, "Do you indeed inform Allah of something God knows not, in the heavens, or on earth? Glory to God! And far is God above the partners they ascribe!"

19. Humankind was one nation, but differed. Had it not been for a Word that went forth from your Lord, their differences would have been settled between them.

20. They say, "Why is not a Sign sent down to him from his Lord?" Say, "The Unseen is only for Allah. Then wait you. I too will wait with you."

21. When We make mankind taste of some mercy after adversity has touched them, behold! They take to plotting against Our Signs! Say, "Swifter to plan is Allah!" Verily, Our messengers record all the plots that you make.

Jonah 10:15-21
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It is not of my own accord to change it. I follow nothing but what is revealed unto me. If I were to disobey my Lord, I should myself fear the Penalty of a Great Day.

If Allah had so willed, I should not have rehearsed it to you, or would God have made it known to you. A whole lifetime before this have I tarried among you: will you not then understand?

Do you indeed inform Allah of something God knows not, in the heavens, or on earth? Glory to God! And far is God above the partners they ascribe!

The Unseen is only for Allah. Then wait you. I too will wait with you.

Swifter to plan is Allah!

Letter to Julia 20110818

Hi there, you gorgeous rock and roll babe! Don't forget that evil and corruption is the normal way of life nowadays, so the real "rebels" are the sincerely righteous! Everyone else is a CONFORMIST, and therefore unfashionable. So many turn away, but Allah suffices me.

Yeah, this is a little house. I don't like big houses, Julia. I like a house where I have the strength to upkeep it with pleasure. The yard takes up a lot of my strength, and I haven't even started on the interior yet. This house is perfect for me and my kitty, but when Julia comes around, there will have to be vast improvements made. Yeah, I know I keep repeating myself on this matter, but I really don't want to live in a big house. I think I can handle the outside by myself, but before you even see the inside, I'm going to have to hire some help to renovate it, to totally rip it apart and repaint it, from the roof to the floor to the restroom/bathroom, add fixtures and cat-proof furniture, central air conditioning, update the kitchen and plumbing, then arrange a maid to keep it clean. And oh yeah, satellite TV for the sports fan, plus high speed internet for international business. The 2 bedrooms are small, but you can have a whole room for yourself for your wardrobe. A child means an extension to the house. No guest rooms! Your buddies are going to have to shack up at some posh hotel. I think they would prefer that, anyway. If I can't afford to update this house for Julia, then it might as well be just me and my kitty. I don't want to give Julia my poverty.

By the way, "best fashion" onstage here with me in Perlis is not the same as a catwalk in New York. The rule is to cover everything except your face and hands. I think you know that, so you might as well start planning. Please don't be resentful about the restriction: Islamic fashion for women is a very profitable business, especially considering the lack of creativity in that area. Check out Queen Amidala's formalwear in Star Wars I, II, and III. Hide your beauty, you princess you.

Qur'an 20110818

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

129. But if they turn away, say, "Allah suffices me. There is no God but God. On God is my trust, God the Lord of the Throne Supreme!"

The Repentance 9:129
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Allah suffices me. There is no God but God. On God is my trust, God the Lord of the Throne Supreme!

Letter to Julia 20110815

I need to remind you that I am somewhat of a recluse, so our marriage ceremonies would mostly consist of your friends. That is why I suggest 2 marriage ceremonies: one for your business, and the other for the benefit of my parents, and the country I was born in. Politics? Maybe. More accurately, the politics of my parents. I'm a musician, not a politician. Anyway, all I need is a small ceremony at the local mosque, something for my parents and God to look at, my ceremony first. You can do whatever spectacle in whatever country you wish, just remember that you are an ambassador for Islam.

I also need to remind you that politics hasn't changed one bit since the time of prophet Muhammad (peace be on him) and what he had to put up with from his people, most likely things have deteriorated. That's one of the reasons why I would like to remain in this village: less people to deal with. Face to face, at least. Back during the days of prophet Muhammad (peace be on him), all communication was by word of mouth. Nowadays, that word of mouth is amplified electronically, and globally. Therefore, I would just like to stay at this house and perfect it, extend it when necessary, and let our business come to us. Any traveling to be done is to be done strictly for your sake, and not too often please. I'm really weary of travel: I even dislike the commute to town. I need to perform my Hajj, but otherwise I just want to take root, and never be seen without you. Oh, I do have to go to Salt Lake City, and find the mysterious piano player. Drat! I guess I should do some shopping when I'm in the USA, but it's going to be tough to haul a Krank amp and other stuff onto the plane.

Then, there's the journey to get you. I have a picture in my head that you are being held prisoner in some way... If I'm your knight, then I'm the supernatural type, in an armor of shadow. I do have a plan but of course, we will have to wait for Allah to give the go-ahead, so please be patient, and maintain your prayers.

But seriously Julia, I am extremely weary of travel. That is why I want our business to come to us. You may argue, "You have to be where the action is!" and that's why you would work in New York, Paris or Berlin. However there is, insyaAllah, a heavy spiritual element in the work I do. Some people would travel many kilometers to see water dripping from a tree in an obscure village by the jungle just because they think it's divine, so what do you think would happen if the attraction is approved of by Allah? I've been toying for a few years already with the idea of audiences coming to see Shadowplay concerts, as opposed to my having to tour, and now my situation forces me to do so. Allah provided me with the ability to mirror the voices of Karen Carpenter, Doris Day, Billie Holiday, and a little bit of Janis Joplin, and with Allah as my witness, people are already coming from far away to hear my rehearsals with a karaoke machine. So eventually, insyaAllah, there will be successful concerts here in Perlis that will pull people from all over the world. Now, my voice doesn't match my ugly mug and my bulky body, so I would rather have the spotlight on you, wearing the best fashions while lip-syncing into an unplugged microphone, while I sit on a couch somewhere onstage watching Shadowplay TV and doing the actual singing, and the audience can have the option of glancing at me if they feel like it. Kind of like a "Jurassic Park" without the mayhem, insyaAllah. Charity work would be a challenge because we don't want to turn the unfortunate into a park attraction, but insyaAllah these people will pool into an area where we can help them, and weed out the frauds. If anyone out there is interested in helping, they can contact the boss of the music school I work at.

Qur'an 20110815

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

104. Know they not that Allah does accept repentance from God's votaries, and receives their gifts of charity, and that Allah is verily God, the Oft-Returning, most Merciful?

105. And say, "Work! Soon will Allah observe your work, and God's messenger, and the believers. Soon will you be brought back to the Knower of what is hidden, and what is open. Then will God show you the truth of all that you did."

The Repentance 9:104-105
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Work! Soon will Allah observe your work, and God's messenger, and the believers. Soon will you be brought back to the Knower of what is hidden, and what is open. Then will God show you the truth of all that you did.

Letter to Julia 20110813

YOOOOOOOLIIIIIIIEEEEEE!!!!

Aaaaaaaa! Suddenly, there's too much to do! But this should only last for another 8 hours, but I do need to get some rest within, and eat! It is 4:49am... hold on, let me grab a bowl of rice gruel... This stuff is actually quite good, even though it sounds biblical (Quranic, rather): I cook up some onions with curry spices, dried chillis, soy sauce, and chopped up shrimp heads, then add some mackerel fillets and fried shrimp to the gruel.

As you may have guessed, success in the entertainment business means that one acts as a sort of brand name. This is not necessarily the same kind of advertising or self-advertising say a politician or wealthy property owner does to increase his/her wealth: it could be purer and more "grass roots" than that. That is my situation insyaAllah, and yours too, since I choose you to be my spouse. Now, those who receive the money (while I don't) are not happy about this matter, and they constantly try to exact revenge. Revenge! Apparently, greed is not enough. This circle of influence is very wide, rich to poor, ranging within many countries, businesses, and religions. Including Islam. Now, many people get intoxicated when doing business deals with the Arabs because they have an idiotic picture in their heads as all Arabs being oil billionaires, but most Arabs are everyday people, like the rest of the world. So don't you get any stereotypes in your head about Arabs being your spiritual superior in Islam when you meet them: remember that prophet Muhammad (peace be on him) was sent to the Arabs. You just worry about keeping your relationship with God sincere.

It really sucks that we have to conduct our love at the edge of war, but human history has always been about war. Perfection is only available in the next life, and that is the point of the religion of Allah. And please don't envy those billionaires: everybody is the same when they are at the edge of death.

Qur'an 20110813

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

81. Those who were left behind rejoiced in their inaction behind the back of the messenger of Allah. They hated to strive and fight, with their goods and their persons, in the Cause of Allah. They said, "Go not forth in the heat." Say, "The fire of hell is fiercer in heat." If only they could understand!

82. Let them laugh a little. Much will they weep, a recompense for that they do.

83. If then, Allah brings you back to any of them, and they ask your permission to come out, say, "Never shall you come out with me, nor fight an enemy with me, for you preferred to sit inactive on the first occasion. Then sit you with those who lag behind!"

84. Nor do you ever pray for any of them that dies, nor stand at his grave, for they rejected Allah and God's messenger, and died in a state of perverse rebellion.

85. Nor let their wealth nor their sons dazzle you. Allah's plan is to punish them with these things in this world, and that their souls may perish in their denial of Allah.

86. When a chapter comes down enjoining them to believe in Allah and to strive along with God's messenger, those with wealth and influence among them ask you for exemption, and say, "Leave us, we would be with those who sit."

87. They prefer to be with those who remain behind: their hearts are sealed, and so they understand not.

88. But the messenger and those who believe with him strive and fight with their wealth and their persons. For them are good things, and it is they who will prosper.

89. Allah has prepared for them gardens under which rivers flow, to dwell within: that is the supreme felicity!

90. And there were among the Arabs, men who made excuses and came to claim exemption, and those who were false to Allah and God's messenger, sat inactive. Soon will a grievous penalty seize the unbelievers among them.

91. There is no blame on those who are infirm or ill, or who find no resources to spend, if they are sincere to Allah and God's messenger: no ground can there be against such as do right, and Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

92. Nor on those who came to you to be provided with transports, and when you said, "I can find no transports for you," they turned back, their eyes streaming with tears of grief that they had no resources wherewith to provide the expenses.

93. The ground is against such as claim exemption while they are rich. They prefer to stay with those who remain behind. Allah has sealed their hearts, so they know not.

94. They will present their excuses to you when you return to them. Say you, "Present no excuses, we shall not believe you. Allah has already informed us of the true state of matters concerning you. It is your actions that Allah and God's messenger will observe. In the end will you be brought back to God, who knows what is hidden, and what is open. Then will God show you the truth of all that you did."


The Repentance 9:81-94
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The fire of hell is fiercer in heat.

Never shall you come out with me, nor fight an enemy with me, for you preferred to sit inactive on the first occasion. Then sit you with those who lag behind!

Present no excuses, we shall not believe you. Allah has already informed us of the true state of matters concerning you. It is your actions that Allah and God's messenger will observe. In the end will you be brought back to God, who knows what is hidden, and what is open. Then will God show you the truth of all that you did.

Letter to Julia 20110811

Again, there's nothing wrong with being wealthy IF IT PLEASES ALLAH. But the norm is greed compounded on greed, like interest compounded on interest, and because it's normal, they keep on doing it. The error of that way of thought is that this world is finite, therefore resources are finite, like petroleum is finite, like the food supply is finite, like the trees that make paper are limited, like cash is limited. So, in the case of emergency, they stash the cash away, but still compound interest. They even urge the government to give them more cash to "stimulate the economy". What an act of mockery and contempt. Then, when the government becomes bankrupt, since they have the money, then they have the power, right? I suppose that means that they will have to exert their power in order to make collections, and become the government. I guess that means they will have to answer to the people, and organize a military and police force. The people would still be their consumer, right? Who else would be their consumer? And their labor? But the people would be destitute if the wealthy have all the cash. The poor cannot get credit. And what business has respect for a consumer who has neither cash nor credit?

A solution would be to spend all that cash for the benefit of the people. Spend the cash on replenishing local resources, research, and food supply, for the survival of the people, and the consumer. But that's unprofitable! What about the standing debt? How about they keep the people alive first? But the people believe in greed! Oh dear, it sounds like Judgement Day. There can be no solution to please greed except for greed itself, which is the problem, not the solution.

I suppose it is easier for me to be charitable as I'm poor, while the hypocrites may say that I complain because I don't have money while they do, and since they do have money, that makes them right. I don't know about my own solution Julia, except that I must be patient, and dependent on only Allah for my wealth. I don't want to give Julia this poverty: I would rather die first, then meet her in heaven. Please grant me a certain level of wealth ya Allah, if I am to go get Julia and give her a good life, and nurture this music You gave me. I don't want to compound interest upon interest. I just want our lives and our work together, Julia and I, to please You.

Qur'an 20110811

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

60. Zakah is for the poor and the needy, and those employed to administer it, for those whose hearts have been reconciled, for those in bondage and in debt, for the cause of Allah, and for the wayfarer, ordained by Allah, and Allah is full of Knowledge and Wisdom.

61. Among them are men who molest the Prophet and say, "He is ear." Say, "He listens to what is best for you, he believes in Allah, has faith in the believers, and is a mercy to those of you who believe." But those who molest the Prophet will have a grievous penalty.

62. To you they swear by Allah, in order to please you. But it is more fitting that they should please Allah and God's messenger, if they are believers.

63. Know they not that for those who oppose Allah and God's messenger is the fire of hell? Wherein they shall dwell. That is the supreme disgrace.

64. The hypocrites are afraid lest a chapter should be sent down about them, showing them what is in their hearts. Say, "Mock you! But verily Allah will bring to light all that you fear!"

65. If you do question them, they declare, "We were only talking idly, and in play." Say, "Was it at Allah, and God's Signs, and God's Messenger, that you were mocking?"

The Repentance 9:60-65
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He listens to what is best for you, he believes in Allah, has faith in the believers, and is a mercy to those of you who believe.

Mock you! But verily Allah will bring to light all that you fear!

Was it at Allah, and God's Signs, and God's Messenger, that you were mocking?

Letter to Julia 20110810

Oh, hi Julia! Are you staying busy, my dearest? Of course you are, as you are very popular! Well, there is no need to seek more popularity. I certainly don't do so, in fact I don't think that popularity even exists: there is only slander, and the reaction to slander. Like those people who bitch about the lousy dollar you occasionally give out as a donation: they whine because the dollar didn't go to them! So they become indignant! During this fasting month, I often partake of the food donations available at the local mosque. What if some charity had been exclusively for me? Regardless of my situation, there would be slander. And that slander would come primarily from the wealthy! I'm sure they even slander me for partaking some of the food donations that's available for everybody. What hypocrites, huh?

People like to find a reason to bitch anyway, that's imperfection for you. But we must be grateful with what Allah gives us, and make the best of it. Someone with global and spiritual connections who is as gorgeous as you would do best to hide her beauty, but you have to work. There can be no blame on you if you appear before your closest kinfolk, your female buddies, and your servants. Just put your fear in Allah, not in humans. Allah sees everything. You are my love, you are my love, you are my love, and I love you.

Qur'an 20110810

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

51. Say, "Nothing will happen to us except what Allah has decreed for us. God is our Protector." And on Allah let the believers put their trust.

52. Say, "Can you expect for us other than one of two glorious things? But we can expect for you either that Allah will send God's punishment directly, or by our hands. So wait: we too will wait with you."

53. Say, "Spend willingly, or unwillingly. Not from you will it be accepted, for you are indeed a people rebellious, and wicked."

54. The only reasons why their contributions are not accepted are that they reject Allah and God's messenger, that they come to prayer without earnestness, and that they offer contributions unwillingly.

55. Let not their wealth nor their sons dazzle you. In reality, Allah's Plan is to punish them with these things in this life, and that their souls may perish in their denial of Allah.

56. They swear by Allah that they are indeed of you, but they are not of you. Yet they are afraid!

The Repentance 9:51-56
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Nothing will happen to us except what Allah has decreed for us. God is our Protector.

Can you expect for us other than one of two glorious things? But we can expect for you either that Allah will send God's punishment directly, or by our hands. So wait: we too will wait with you.

Spend willingly, or unwillingly. Not from you will it be accepted, for you are indeed a people rebellious, and wicked.

Letter to Julia 20110808

Certainly you see it, don't you Julia? In a business where the norm is greed, evil, machinations and sluts, having spirituality and righteousness would give you an edge way over the top above every other girl. A Muslim, too. What a special girl. Keep your faith sincere and give your best, my love: my understanding is that Allah will double your reward, more than any others in your field, in this life as well as the hereafter, and your sustenance will be most generous.

Your situation is not the same as mine. I have to undergo different tests of faith than you. Sure, I'm not in the States right now, and there is a Muslim majority here, but since I do what I do in the global music business, a Muslim too, it's still basically me and my kitty, hiding in a cave, adrift on a sea of enemies. Now if this journey were easy and the gains immediate, then people in general would be more helpful and receptive. But since the task is difficult, what I get is, "If only we could, we would help you." Allah knows these lies, and so do I, because I've heard it all before, when I had to walk alone among the drunk atheists and the Satan worshippers. I have been doing this work and have been giving it all I have for many, many years now, with Allah as my witness, and it suits me just fine if Allah is my only friend.

Letter to Julia 20110806

Hi Julia! How is my lovely sweetie today? Are you in a fighting mood? Well, please put all that energy into something constructive. I tell my students (and myself) to put their anger into the drums. When I listen to my own drumming, I realize that there is nothing but great rage in it! But since I'm not drumming at this particular moment, I don't feel any anger at all. Oh, but how I would love to plug into a 100W tube stack, crank it up, and shatter some windows! Ah, weapons of intimidation and destruction! Oh, restraint, restraint!

I've been glancing at my table covers (in this case, it's the newspaper from March 9, 2011), and I see many madcap things have been happening in the fashion biz. Y'know, like John Galliano getting fired from Dior, etc etc. But mostly, I was aghast at what the fashion designers call "ready-to-wear". Anyway, I usually ignore the mass media because they never have anything good to say, so I'm generally apathetic about the age of the news I get. Sure, humans love gossip and bad news, but I get that anyway without having to make any effort to even click on a link. Sure, I don't have as many buddies as you, and having buddies means indulging in gossip. But I do have all that yard work to do, and I haven't even started on my interior decorating. Oh no, the restroom needs cleaning! I'll just flush the whole room out with a hose and some bleach. Oh no, water pressure has been so low lately!

What were we talking about? Anyway, I wanted to take this opportunity to discuss priesthood in Islam. Well, there is no priesthood in Islam. At least, there's not supposed to be. There are in Islam learned people, and clerics who lead the prayers, bilals who call the prayers etc, but no priests. The thing is that each human has a direct connection with God, and does not need a mediator. In Islam, having a mediator with God is actually forbidden. There are prophets, like prophet Muhammad (peace be on him) who was the final prophet, but otherwise everyone is to take his/her problem or plea directly to Allah. But I'm certain you've seen people of some sort of position who behave like priests who push their rank and weight around, accumulate wealth from God knows what source, and flash that wealth around, from Christianity, Judaism and Islam. Worse are the people who put them on that pedestal derogatory of Allah.

Qur'an 20120805

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

23. O you who believe! Take not for protectors your fathers and your brothers if they love infidelity above Faith. If any of you do so, they do wrong.

24. Say, "If it be that your fathers, your sons, your brothers, your mates, your kindred, the wealth you have gained, the commerce in which you fear a decline, or the dwellings in which you delight are dearer to you than Allah and God's messenger, or the striving in God's cause, then wait until Allah brings about God's Decision. And Allah guides not the rebellious."

The Repentance 9:23-24
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If it be that your fathers, your sons, your brothers, your mates, your kindred, the wealth you have gained, the commerce in which you fear a decline, or the dwellings in which you delight are dearer to you than Allah and God's messenger, or the striving in God's cause, then wait until Allah brings about God's Decision. And Allah guides not the rebellious.

Letter to Julia 20110804

YOOOOOOLIIIIIEEEEE!!!!

Hello there, my beloved precious beauty. How are you feeling today? I assume you are staying busy, as you should. I am quite busy too, it could be that I'm busy loafing... Far from it! I'm up most of the night, so I sleep all morning. Sounds like a rock anthem, huh? I spend a lot of time in the garden. Hey, life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around sometimes, you might miss something! I suppose I've been having one extra long "Ferris Bueller's Day Off". Is Ferris Bueller a German? It sounds like a German surname. My situation feels eerie. It feels like I will go from having all this time to having no time at all. Well, I guess that could be true for anybody.

Anyway, I love looking at the many levels of flowers in the garden. Sure, we all notice the big flashy blossoms, but since I have the time, I pick through the many species of grass to expose the many types of flower vines growing underneath. Tiny little flowers growing on vines, blue, white, pink and yellow, all just about 1mm to 3mm. I have started to cut away the big, chunky grass to allow the little flowers to breathe and multiply. Oh my God, I just increased my workload! I also came across some clover vines, which I plan to transplant. It's like looking through a microscope at a miniature universe. So now when I ponder upon my garden, I see all this unsightly and ugly grass I have to clear out, plus all that crap at the back and on the roof of the house. It's kind of like listening to my own music.

Not having my laptop sucks. I have to admit that playing GTA San Andreas is a guilty pleasure of mine. I like to type in the MROEMZH cheat, and everybody turns into a gang member: it's like having a shootout at a political rally! But I mostly use my laptop to write music with. I know my work is important, so I will have to get my laptop repaired eventually, insyaAllah. Or find some other way to produce music. But others (besides Allah) don't see my work as important enough to help me get the technology I need to work with, or even survive and have a home, but that's fine. Seriously, it's fine. Allah is the Only One I really trust, anyway. But it's not always that people disbelieve that I strive to please Allah with music. The proof of that is my electric guitar, which happens to be a gift from a mosque, which is otherwise unheard of. I suppose one could call my work a "jihad". Most idiots assume that a "jihad" is to slaughter innocent people in the name of Allah. It's not entirely their fault that they think so: it is also due to the conditioning of the enemies of Allah. A "jihad" is a striving and self-sacrifice for the purpose of justice and compassion for the sake of Allah, and that happens to be my work: not just from theory, but from what has happened to me. No I'm not Gandhi, I'm a Muslim! My Boss is Allah, and my leader is prophet Muhammad (peace be on him). I also work towards you, my Julia. What a magnificent looking woman you are, my love. Allah is the One Who will bring us together, insyaAllah.