Saturday, January 7, 2017

My wife, the professional endorser of food products

If you have no time for getting a full night's sleep, then you must take naps.  Naps are healthier and more efficient than stimulants.  You can nap in cars, during breaks, etc. If you feel drowsy, immediately take a nap if you can.  Tell whoever is around you, "I'm going to shut my eyes and take a short nap, so please excuse me."  Then slouch back in your chair or put your head on the table, and take a nap.  Don't try to fall asleep: that's a waste of time.  Go instantly into a dream.

As my wife, you are automatically a professional endorser of food products.  This power must be used by you, because it will give you and your bosses influence over food and other products.  As my wife, you must whisper "In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful" before taking the first bite: you don't have to let people hear you say that!  You must not eat:
1.. Carrion
2.  Blood
3.  The flesh of swine
4.  food on which other than the name of Allah has been pronounced.
This is a very lenient list, from the Qur'an.  Personally, I don't want you to do drugs or drink alcohol either.

So go out with your family and/or model buddies, and enjoy good food.  You must do this, or people will hate you!  Better yet, have your bosses dress you up nicely, and make reservations for you at classy restaurants.  Eat what you feel like eating: you don't have to eat snails and frogs if you don't want to!

Erin, according to my calculations, you should be able to make good money with a cell phone camera and make video/photographic endorsements at home.  More so, if you get your agency and a production team involved.  This would compromise your privacy, which isn't a blessing and I'm sorry this has to happen, but you do have this power and people will expect you to help them.  Natty, I don't expect you to take a cooking class, but it would be to your advantage if you did.  Pina, you must learn how to make Italian food while living in Milano.  I mean, Milan.




Here are some snapshots of my wearing red at a "Best in Black" competition at the  disco.  I didn't do it on purpose.  The place was packed by the way, so don't be fooled by appearance.