The Vegas Connection

It's going to be unique, Erin.  The stuff of world history.  Only the inner circle will truly know.  I can see how you became fatigued from not eating your super foods.  I hope this doesn't discourage you from learning how to cook.  Face it- you must practice to become better.  After all, the people who made that beautiful packaged food you eat had to learn how to cook.  Turmeric toast, kelp noodles... are you sure there's no gluten?  Kelp noodles is a good idea though, but there has to be some sort of flour in there.  I have a man-sized appetite, so that food would make me miserable unless I eat at least quadruple portions.

But there's no denying that hummus is good food, and good for you, and can be prepared in gigantic portions.  First, a kilo of lentils.  The traditional recipe calls for chick peas, but I use lentils because it tastes the same and is cheaper.

Wash the lentils to get rid of bugs and debris, then soak overnight.  Before:

 After:

Add onions and garlic and blend bit by bit, and use the same water over and over again.

Strain the water out of the blend.  I used my hands, but a spatula is good enough.

Chuck the water, but save the starch!

Then add salt and lemon juice for sourness.  I used Thai lime, but only a little because that stuff can be too powerful and cause diarrhea.

Mix everything together.

Nothing smells better than freshly made hummus.  A scent of heaven.

Natty, I can tell you are having fun.  Go ahead and have fun Sweetie, but stay clean and protect your chastity.  Please pray.  Don't get greedy.

Pina, my wives will be very famous inshaAllah.  Fame is a drag, but is great for a modeling career and your bosses.  Prepare to lose your privacy.  Stay clean, and protect your chastity.  Please pray.  Don't get greedy.