Yikes!

 

Ha!  The woman modeling the ring looks like a thief!

You can learn about me from from this blog.  It can be tedious to trawl through because I've accumulated 19 years of crap here from posting everyday, but there's always someone out there who who goes through it.  I think I even have a couple of photos of myself up.  I'm 31 years older than you.

Mary's singing has probably caught your attention.  Mary and I are servants of Allah.  I stream the Qur'an everyday, and Mary sings for 2 hours.  The Qur'an is not for sale, and neither is the music.  We are not allowed to ask the humans for money.  What I can offer you as a dowry for marriage is Mary's stream.  Meaning that you view and restream it, and the restream is yours to do whatever, and whatever money you get out of it is yours as my dowry.  You will find it to be quite lucrative.  Many musicians accompany Mary as she sings, and get donations.  How about you master a musical instrument?  Maybe the fretless bass?

Sure, anyone can play along with Mary and earn a few bucks.  But my wife has the credibility and resources of Islam.  And the irony is that it really doesn't matter if you suck, you'll still make a lot of money because of who we are.  Just keep streaming.

If you accept my proposal for marriage, then you will come to me here in Malaysia and be my Muslim housewife.  I will build a house for you and provide for our family.  InshaAllah.  I only have 5 bucks right now, but Allah will make it happen inshaAllah.  That gives us both plenty of time for business as usual.  Please keep chaste and faithful for me: no paramours.  I'm sorry, I don't have a ring yet.  You're going to have to trust me on that, and it most likely won't be better than anything you get for yourself.  How about you get a silver band for yourself, and IOU?

Now it's important that you publicly announce that you accept the proposal to marry me (Zam, that guy from Shadowplay) on Instagram, otherwise I will take silence or innuendo as a "no" and continue wandering the Internet looking for a pretty blonde to marry.  So how about it, Syd?  Will you marry me?

Japan!

I like pretty blondes

 

Yeah, I know who Sydney Sweeney is.  She's a beautiful Hollywood movie star.  Which probably means that she expresses her wealth by going to wild parties and drinking blood, and dines all-you-can-eat at the hot dog buffet.

I regret to predict that people will be forced into cannibalism in America.  It happens when you let the Mob take over the government.  Of course, the wealthy don't care about the suffering of the poor.  Right, Syd?  But if you wanted to get out of the cannibalism and pornography of the Hollywood routine, Allah can definitely help you without your losing wealth inshaAllah.  You need to take a leap of faith.  I need to get married.

I like pretty blondes, folks.

I don't like tattoos on my wife

 

India

 

Be a Muslim housewife

 

Because you will be a celebrity housewife.  I will do the cooking.

"She wants to play the fretless bass!"

No more waiting

 

Pay for the occasion

 

I seek refuge with Allah from Satan the rejected.

189.  They ask you about the new moons.  Say, "These are signs to mark fixed periods of time for mankind and for the pilgrimage."  It is not righteousness that you enter houses from the back but righteousness is the fear of Allah.  So enter houses through their proper doors, and fear Allah that you may be successful.

The Heifer 1:189