Letter to Erin 20150103

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Erin, you're such a cutie.  You are my beautiful little sweetheart, and I love you with all my heart.  It is your sweetness that is most attractive about you, so when you offer us your nip slip in your cute and sweet manner, you drive us all into a frenzy.  It's not only that people might stop taking you seriously, but you might drive some people into a raging fury of love with your aura of innocence, which can be dangerous.  You could always wear a top underneath your jacket, or avoid plunging necklines.  Are you being paid to endorse a bra?  What bra?  My dearest darling Erin, please dress modestly.  I love you, and I need you.

My poor Floofy hurt her foot.  As you know, she has become jealous of her own kittens.  The kittens are almost grown up now, and I separated the boys from the girls by keeping the boys outside and the girls inside.  The other night, there was a catfight outside my window.  Floofy has been totally antisocial lately, finding her pleasure in open hostility, and growls at everyone including me.  But who hurt her foot? was it one of her kittens?  After a couple of nights in solitary confinement for her own protection, her foot seems to have gotten better, even though she still hobbles.  But she can limp away faster than I can chase her down to put her back in the cage, so I guess she must be getting better inshaAllah.