So with your permission, I would like to take a second wife from one of your friends, specifically the girl that Victoria's Secret has chosen for me: Erin.
Of course, nothing can happen while I am still too broke to marry, so here's the plan: when Allah does grant me the wealth I need to marry inshaAllah, I will immediately proceed to buy the land for the little house I live in now, plus the land to build Casa de Julia. I will renovate this little house by adding a master bedroom, a walk-in wardrobe and separate bathroom, plus other little things like making the doorways taller, etc. Then I will marry Julia, and we will both live in this little house while we supervise the building of Casa de Julia.
I want us all to live in the same house because it would be easier for me to help protect you, but Allah is the Best to protect. So please be so kind as to make accommodations in your house plans to fit Erin and our children in your house. Please remember the goal is to slow down, stay put, and raise a family,
Meanwhile, I will talk to Erin as I talk to you, through these letters. When Julia and I are officially married inshaAllah, I will re-title these letters as "Letter to Erin". Next is the issue of dowry. Until I am able to give you both rings, I will offer Erin the same kind of dowry I offered you: a song. This song titled "Yearning", I wrote and recorded in 1994 (I wrote "Flowers in the Nude" in 1988 and recorded it in 2006), and is inspired by the novel "Steppenwolf" by Hermann Hesse. Nowadays, I read only the Qur'an. It is only music, but then what is a model without music? Nowadays when I voice train, I sing the song one octave up from the baritone I recorded it with, so please don't expect to hear the baritone ever again.
Erin, please marry me. If you accept, then please prepare yourself for marriage. I cannot be married to a non-Muslim, but you will have plenty of time to get ready. Please take that time to quit alcohol, cigarettes, pork, and recreational drugs if any, and I will take the same time to observe your Islam. What I desire is your chastity, purity, and integrity. Please take your position seriously. People are fanatical in general, and we have Islam added to that mix. So both of you please prepare for mayhem. You don't have to be extreme with your Islam, just do the best you can with the situation that Allah has given you. It begins with saying out loud, "I bear witness that the only deity worthy of worship is Allah, and I bear witness that Muhammad is the messenger of Allah."
