Letter to Julia 20120927

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Julia.  It is I, your spouse-to-be, insyaAllah.  The one who loves you, and wants to marry you.  Well, the vet said that the cat had ulcers in her mouth, caused by a virus.  Aha.  She made me buy some drugs, and God willing, the cat will be healed.  Bat Cat is back to full energy, it seems.  Praise Allah, but he is soooo naughty.  He is tenaciously naughty, and fearless with a foul temper.  Perhaps Allah is giving me a preview of our son.  Are all boys like that?  It would be ludicrous for me to ask for and expect a perfect human being.  I hate young boys.  I'm the opposite of Michael Jackson.  I don't know if I want to have kids if they're going to be impossible.  I want to name our first son Muhammad, and our first daughter Mary.  You can name the rest of the kids.  It is traditional in Malaysia for Moms of all races to use a rattan cane to discipline their kids.  Are you the strict type of Mom?  I'm pretty easy-going, and forgiving.  The Prophet (peace be on him) said for parents to cane the kids at the age of 10 if they refuse to pray.  I believe prayer to be critically important, not just for Muslim couples and families like us, so I would follow that instruction.  I was a nightmare to my parents and teachers when I was a kid, and thoroughly hated by everyone in high school.  Perhaps if I had prayed regularly when I was young, I would be a better person today.

Ya Allah, please grant Julia and I beautiful, happy, healthy, and righteous children.  Anyway my beloved, don't be in a big hurry to convince the skeptical.  Who cares about them, anyway.  I am here to sing for Allah, and you are my wife.  Take your time, slow down.  I've slowed down my Victoria's Secret fashion show loop to about 2 frames a second.  Hee hee!  I love looking for unintentional mug shots, jinns, and secrets that Victoria didn't intend to reveal!