Mayonnaise

 

Hi Natty!  How are you, Honey?  I hope you are healthy and everything is easy-going over there for you.  Would you like some dinner?  I had eggs and beans for dinner just now.  I suppose it's more of an English breakfast, but it was dinner.  This current batch of beans is very sweet.  I didn't use any sugar, though.  It shows that many foods are already naturally sweet, that you don't need to add sugar.  I didn't use salt, either.  My cats love my beans.

Ugh, I forgot that I'm sensitive to mayonnaise.  I'm like a walking quality test for mayo: if it didn't turn my stomach, then it's high quality mayonnaise.  I can't get Best Foods here, maybe online I can.  The big jar of mayo that I bought for the ranch is OK in small quantities, but apparently not for salad dressings, and not for dipping my fries in.  I'll have to concede that my ranch dressing is too thick.  It's a shame to waste it because it tastes so good...  I'm going to have to water it down.  Milk it down, rather.  If that doesn't work, then I'm going to have to buy different mayo.  Sigh.

Zam's goat milk ranch dressing part two

 

Hi Natty!  How are you, Honey?  I hope everything is peachy for you over there.  It's Monday here.  I swear Honey, there's less time between the Asr and sunset prayers than ever before.  I'm not imagining this, I had to hustle just to get a few stupid things done.  I think the earth's spin is changing direction, which would account for weather distortion as well.  I did have time to clean Adolf's ears this morning.  I bought a lemon yesterday, which is useful for all sorts of cat remedies.  He didn't enjoy the ear wash at all, and he spent the rest of the morning sulking by the window.  Poor kitty!  What a cruel world!  Don't worry folks, he cheered right up when I had snacks after lunch.

Ray-yanch!  Ah gotta have mah ray-yanch!  How do you like my cowboy accent?  Do you think it's white hat or black hat?  As you can see Honey, my goat milk ranch dressing turned out successful.  It's so thick and creamy!  It might as well be blue cheese, but it's ranch!  The annoying thing is that it didn't need salt when I tasted it, but it needed salt when I dipped my fries in it.  And fries are salty!  What's up with that?  It must be some kind of profound fries philosophy.  It could be too thick though, as if that were a problem.  It's nice to have thick dip, don't you agree?  Next time I'll just use liquid whole milk, and make the ranch slightly runnier.  Goat's milk doesn't really make it taste any different.

In other news, I finally got a response from Elizabeth Fraser about the lyrics for "Frou-frou foxes in Midsummer Fires".  Of course, I would get the communique via her society.  What a star she is!  As you can see below, the actual lyrics fit her better than what I came up with.  Mary said that she has to relearn the song, now that she knows the real lyrics.  Thank you, Elizabeth Fraser!

Zam's goat milk ranch dressing part one

 

Hi Natty!  Hi Honey!  Are you mad at me for trying to get you to cut down on sugar?  Please don't be mad at me, because I love you!  It's just that your age is the perfect time to wean yourself from too much sugar.  The concept is sweet treats occasionally, not daily.  Once you cross the line and need a sugar shot everyday, there's no turning back.  Not that I've seen, anyway.  Anyway, I hope all is well with you today.  I'm kind of beat myself, and I absolutely didn't want to cook dinner, so I bought takeout.  I do have a batch of beans stewing on the stove top.  This time I cut the fat content, so it shouldn't be too rich.  Rich beans!  Beans are supposed to be poor man's food.

My quest for fry sauce has led me to the decision to just make ranch dressing instead of bothering with a novelty sauce.  If you hadn't noticed, ranch dressing is runny.  Ever order a side of ranch?  It's runny, right?  That's because they add buttermilk to mayo and ranch spices.  Buttermilk is the waste product from making butter.  I figure whole milk would make a richer ranch, and powdered milk would make a thicker ranch.  When I was at the supermarket I bought a big jar of mayo, but the powdered milk was ridiculously overpriced, and I didn't want that much.  Just enough to flavor my ranch dressing.  Then I saw these single-serve packets of goat milk.  Goat milk is very popular around here.  I don't drink the stuff, maybe I should.  I've tried goat cheese, and I've seen people put goat cheese on their pizza.  I'm sure you've tried goat cheese, being the uptown girl you are.  It's not for me, though.  I checked the ingredients on the package, and it said "goat milk".  Really?  No additives?  Wow!  So I bought a packet to make ranch dressing with.  More to come...

Fry sauce

 

Hi Natty!  How are you?  I hope you are having lots of fun, and feeling great.  It's a cold day today.  I like it cold here, so alhamdulillah.  You would think that we don't sweat when it's cold.  But I had to prune the creeper tree on the old house this evening, and put up an annoying sweat, and it's bloody cold!  Well, it's not that cold.  I know what cold is, while most people here don't.

Want some fries?  I made a cheeseburger and fries for dinner.  The fry sauce in the video above looks OK, it's just another mayo based sauce that turns into that off-white color.  Probably has some sourness to it from the vinegar.  The Worcestershire sauce is a good idea.   It's basically a fermented fish sauce with tamarind.  But if you were to make a mayo based sauce, why not just dip your fries in ranch dressing?  Yes Honey, I know how to make ranch dressing.  I think I should just do that instead of bothering about making a novelty sauce.  I was at the supermarket this morning, and I bought a bottle of chilli sauce so as to make fry sauce with.  But I forgot to buy chillies, so I wound up accidentally endorsing this sauce by dipping my fries in it.  There's nothing special about this chilli sauce.  It's just the cheapest chilli sauce there is, that isn't based on ketchup.

Snacks

 

Hi there, beautiful Natty!  How's it going today?  I sure hope you are keeping safe and healthy.  I just got done with dinner.  I had eggs and beans, plus I steamed some fishy treats my brother gave me.  I made the last batch of beans too rich, I can't eat too much at a time.  That cats love them, but if I can't eat the beans then they can't eat the beans.  I might have to chuck the whole batch, I don't know.  I didn't have anything sweet.  I did buy a bottle of strawberry juice with basil seeds yesterday (a Vietnamese soft drink), I drank half of it then and the other half this morning.  That was sweet.  I planted some of the seeds just to see what happens.  They're most likely dead, but you never know.  I know you love sweets Honey, but now is the time to slam on the brakes and make sugary things an occasional thing instead of an everyday thing, and not be forced to chop off a leg or two.  If you can't live without sugar, then you definitely (will) have diabetes.

My brother also gave me some fish crackers, so I fried them up yesterday evening.  My mother loves the stuff, and I like them too sometimes.  Depends on the recipe.  This is a good batch though, and the same type as the video above.  I used a big fire though, so I had to hustle cook.  I dropped a handful at a time into super hot oil, and got done with the task very quickly.  These fish crackers make a nice snack, with no sugar and the crunch is gentle and easy on the teeth.  Of course the cats love this stuff.  I can't even eat it in the privacy of my bedroom and they hear the crunch, then start yowling at my bedroom door.  Would you like to try some?

Gumption

 

Hi Natty!  Oh, nice country!  Where is that?  I'm happy to see you enjoy yourself.  I'm also happy to see you show some gumption.  Of course, it's easier to have courage when there are people backing you up.  At least you don't have to be a man.  A man is expected to show courage whether he is alone or whatever.  But you don't have to be a man.  You are MY girl.  I will take care of you, inshaAllah.  I'm sure you don't have to worry about being cocky.  As your brother would say, "Don't die stupidly".  By they way, I think it's good you removed that photo of his looking like an adult Beavis.

Nice cake!  Please place a limit on your sugar consumption.

Birds

 

Hi Natty!  How are you, Honey?  Are you enjoying the ride?  I hope you are feeling good and having tons of fun.  Oh, are those buzzards on that tree?  I didn't know California had buzzards.  I must say that you have some clever bosses, Natty.  I hope they sell out of bags.

It's been cold today.  That doesn't bother me, I like it cold.  It's the tropical heat and swelter that I can't stand.  It's so comfortable here, I could sleep and sleep until tomorrow or whatever.  I didn't, of course.  All sorts of birds always hang out at my house, and can get very talkative.  The bird in the video above is supposed to be illegal to catch.  So how did it get into the cage?  But the birds have been whispering all day today.  Just soft pips and chips in a subdued and serious tone.  It must be the cold.