The Vegas Connection

It's going to be unique, Erin.  The stuff of world history.  Only the inner circle will truly know.  I can see how you became fatigued from not eating your super foods.  I hope this doesn't discourage you from learning how to cook.  Face it- you must practice to become better.  After all, the people who made that beautiful packaged food you eat had to learn how to cook.  Turmeric toast, kelp noodles... are you sure there's no gluten?  Kelp noodles is a good idea though, but there has to be some sort of flour in there.  I have a man-sized appetite, so that food would make me miserable unless I eat at least quadruple portions.

But there's no denying that hummus is good food, and good for you, and can be prepared in gigantic portions.  First, a kilo of lentils.  The traditional recipe calls for chick peas, but I use lentils because it tastes the same and is cheaper.

Wash the lentils to get rid of bugs and debris, then soak overnight.  Before:

 After:

Add onions and garlic and blend bit by bit, and use the same water over and over again.

Strain the water out of the blend.  I used my hands, but a spatula is good enough.

Chuck the water, but save the starch!

Then add salt and lemon juice for sourness.  I used Thai lime, but only a little because that stuff can be too powerful and cause diarrhea.

Mix everything together.

Nothing smells better than freshly made hummus.  A scent of heaven.

Natty, I can tell you are having fun.  Go ahead and have fun Sweetie, but stay clean and protect your chastity.  Please pray.  Don't get greedy.

Pina, my wives will be very famous inshaAllah.  Fame is a drag, but is great for a modeling career and your bosses.  Prepare to lose your privacy.  Stay clean, and protect your chastity.  Please pray.  Don't get greedy.

Why are you tired, Honey?

Have you been overworking?  Have you been losing sleep?  Have you been worrying too much?  Pisces like to worry, if you believe in that stuff.  I don't put my trust in astrology: I put my trust in Allah.  Every day, we go about our routine.  If we are comfortable, then we go la-de-da sleepwalking through our days until a crisis comes.  We either get through it or not, then we go again la-de-da sleepwalking.  This pattern repeats itself, and is somewhat fractal don't you agree?  A proof that Judgement Day will come, whether we care or not.  We experience miniature Judgement Days, over and over, until Judgement Day.  Please don't worry, my love.  I love you, and I give whatever strength I have to you.

You're a modest girl, Natty.  I really like that about you.  If you're so modest, why do you dream of being a movie star?  Hm.

Hi Pina!  I'm glad I know how to properly pronounce your name now, otherwise I would have gone on calling you Pynee.  I don't have any money right now, but I do seem to have some power of endorsement mashaAllah.  So I posted this video of you as an endorsement as a wife.  So everybody, her name is pronounced "Pina", not "Pynee."  Got it?

Little girl catches big fish

Ugh... I caught a fever.  The weekend took a greater toll on me than I thought.  Ah Erin, you look so beautiful and feminine in that hairdo.  I think I like you better with your natural curly hair.  Isn't it about time that you made another appearance on the Dan Patrick show?  Those guys were pretty intimidated by you the last time.  I'm sure they are petrified of you now.  Try to only talk about sports the next time you're on that show.

I already posted this video of the "little girl catches big fish" before, and I'm posting it again today for you Natty.  Erin already caught her fish, now it's your turn.

The other video is one of my many self-motivated Dutch propaganda videos.

Weight gain

Well, there it is.  When you increase in power, then you have to exercise restraint and control.  So when you cook your own food, you have control over what you eat and the portions thereof.  Learning to cook exactly as much as you need takes practice.  More so when you cook for others.  You never had this problem when you ate packaged foods, huh?  Cooking your own food is superior to eating prepared foods, especially when you cook for others.  Study the structure and read the ingredients of your favorite foods, and try to duplicate them.  Organize your leftovers.

Natty, you must start being more of a businesswoman, and pay more attention to the photos that are being taken of you.  If you don't like what you see, then start kicking and screaming and throwing furniture around, until they start taking good photos.  You ought to know when you look best, so don't just let them send garbage through.  And please stay clean, and don't turn into an alcoholic or drug addict.  Intoxication is not the same as relaxation.  Don't allow the corruption of your body, because it is the cause of self-hatred and self-destruction.  And you're such a beautiful girl.

Piene, I was waiting for my Dad to get done with his specialist's appointment, so I watched "Cruise Diaries" or whatever it's called, and the ship was in Amsterdam.  Wow, what a beautiful place!  With all those canals, and such.  I must look for more videos about the Netherlands on YouTube.  How about you host a video tour?

Qur'an 20161206

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

30.  And they set up equals to Allah, to mislead from the Path!  Say, "Enjoy!  But verily you are making straightway for hell!"

Abraham 14:30
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Cold and rainy

But it doesn't snow here.  I like it when it gets colder, but my cats don't.  I said that I am influenced by health dept protocols in food preparation, but I still remain somewhat of a lazy slob.  Nobody's perfect, least of all me. Dinner tonight was the healthy regular, which is hummus, eggs, and fried onions, which I enjoyed with some fish sausage I bought at the night market.  I also made some curry pups for lunch.  My stuffing mix today is garlic, onions, potatoes, ground beef, cilantro seeds, chopped chives, and hot red pepper puree.  And curry powder, of course.   I want to try chicken and fish curry pups someday.  Curry is curry, right?

Hey Natty, underneath that crazy rebel is a very shy girl.  I think you should make an effort to be friends with photographers who take good shots of you.  You know who they are. Don't be shy with them.

Piene you blessed girl, you're still in Italy.  I always talk all concerned about how thin you are, but I know you have a naturally thin build.  I was upset at some of the photos in your portfolio, so that's why I bitch about it.  You're a beautiful girl.

The Nose part 2

Hi there, beautiful Erin!  Most people think that my main inspiration when it comes to cooking is "Iron Chef", but that's not it.  I like Iron Chef, but my main influence in cooking is the Department of Health and Human Services.  That's where I get my ideas for planning meals.  You might be wondering when to chuck the food that's been in the fridge too long.  The key is to use your nose: if you don't like the way it smells, then throw it away.  Of course if it's covered in mold, then you should dump that too.  Mold makes a great antibiotic, though.

Hey Natty, you are looking beautiful.  Please look after yourself and stay clean: don't be an alcoholic or drug addict.

Piene, you're beautiful too.  What's for dinner?