Letter to Erin 20151001

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I find it difficult to accept that you be extremely busy and not have digestive problems.  It's not just the stress of work, but also the inconsistency of the food you find on the road.  Most people think that if you consume something or diet frequently enough, then you would get used to it.  I find that the stomach, especially of sensitive people, would shut down with persistent abuse.  The glutton becomes obese, the anorexic becomes unable to eat, and the bulimic dry heaves for no reason.You should try to make life easy and predictable for your tummy when you are busy traveling and what not.  Prepare your own food as often as possible.  Just something to get you by, until life allows you a pause.  Before you check into your hotel room, stop by a grocery store and pick up some sliced bread, sliced meats/cheeses, salad mix and fruit.  Or stop by a convenience store and buy some sliced bread, sliced meats/cheeses and canned food/fruit.  Or in a foreign country, stop by a convenience store and pick up some flat bread and canned food.  When you have to leave town, just chuck the lot into the trash then repeat the process when you get to the next town.  Wasteful maybe, but not on your tummy.

You must take care of your tummy since I'm not there to take care of you!  Don't experiment with food when you're busy: keep it predictable.  Don't trust strangers to prepare your food.  Don't starve yourself either.  Remember to say, "In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful" before taking the first bite/sip.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150930

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I hope you're not feeling too lonely.  This may seem like an uncomfortable topic, but I am very concerned about your emotions.  I did warn you that it gets very lonely at the top.  The worst part of it is when friends become competitors.  Worse than the worst is when money is involved.  I don't think I'm at the top or whatever (I don't have any money, it's very difficult to feel successful), but it is not my nature to be competitive.  I just do, and I have done it alone for so long that I'm used to it.  I can't expect you to feel the same way, so I worry about that.  At least you will find out who your real friends are.  If you need someone to talk to, you can always talk to me.  Please have faith and patience and pray that Allah will resolve our affair for us in happiness and security.  For whatever it's worth, I reassure you with Allah as my witness that my promise to you is true- I don't go slutting around or even talking to other girls.  Very strange for the Rock and Roll business.  But I love you, and I need you.

I hope you are eating properly, enough to maintain your energy especially now you are super busy.  I guess you found out that endorsing something doesn't mean that you have to endorse something in your underwear.  So you can dress modestly if you want, rather it gives you more middle class credibility.  I don't want you to lose any self esteem, so please try to stay fit and healthy.  Yeah, I know you can't do an infomercial while doing butt crunches.  Unless it's about butt crunches.  I know I sound like a mother hen.  The world needs you.  MashaAllah.  Because you are MY girl.

Letter to Erin 20150929

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin, my darling!  Are you in the mood for love today?  I wish I were with you, just for us to be together.  I love you, and I need you.

It's been a busy day today for me.  A lot of running around, paying bills.  My power bill, Internet bill, phone bill, water bill... so I had lunch downtown.  Flat bread and curry.  I'm feeling a little groggy, because I worked late on the Internet last night.  I'm a groggy doggy!  But I didn't sleep all day obviously.  After voice training, I tended the garden, and scraped dirt out of the fire pit.  It's tough to get any work done with a Bat Cat perched on me like a feline parrot.  He would be a lot cuter if he didn't dig his claws in.  Shoo!  I spent so much today, I didn't want to go to the night market.  So I harvested the eggplant in my garden, and for dinner I had flat bread with beef and eggplant marinara sauce.  Want some?  Oh, I forgot to work out!  I'll catch up tomorrow inshaAllah.

Letter to Erin 20150928

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin.  How are you today, Sweetie?  I'm sure you are busy from now to the end of the year with the holiday shopping season, so please get sufficient rest and eat properly.  You probably don't have much time to work out, but try to do a little anyway.  I did my workout today even though I hurt my elbows the day before, but I didn't have much problem doing my push ups.  I guess I can get back to playing bass tonight.  It's been raining here since the afternoon prayer, so I'm writing this letter earlier than I usually do.  I can't do anything outside when it rains, so I cleaned my bedroom instead.  No cooking either, because I have too many leftovers.  So I'll just kick back and watch TV.  I want you to have fun with your work, and be assured that I love you.  And I need you.  Take care, OK?

Qur'an 20150928

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

20.  Say, "I do no more than invoke my Lord, and I join not with God anything."

21.  Say, "It is not in my power to cause you harm, or to bring you to right conduct."

22.  Say, "No one can deliver me from Allah, nor should I find refuge except in God."

23.  Mine is only to convey what I receive from Allah and God's messages.  For any that disobey Allah and God's messenger, for them is hell: they shall dwell therein forever.

24.  At length, when they see that which they are promised, then will they know who it is that is weakest in helper, and least important in numbers.

25.  Say, "I know not whether that which you are promised is near, nor whether my Lord will appoint for it a distant term."

The Jinns 67:20-25
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I do no more than invoke my Lord, and I join not with God anything.

It is not in my power to cause you harm, or to bring you to right conduct.

No one can deliver me from Allah, nor should I find refuge except in God.

I know not whether that which you are promised is near, nor whether my Lord will appoint for it a distant term.

Letter to Erin 20150927

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello Erin.  Wow, it's a hot day here right now.  I'm writing this letter sooner than usual, staying inside watching TV in the air conditioned room.  Yeah, I'm lazy.  But I'll get back to work eventually.  I hurt my elbows playing bass last night, playing the same riff over and over again.  It's the only way to play bass, is to be flawless.  Bass hates imperfection.  If I make a mistake, then I feel it.  Everyone feels it.  So I have to practice bass with headphones on.  But yeah, I overdid it last night so my elbows hurt.  I'm taking it easy right now.  Yeah I'm lazy.  I do have to go out and buy cat food later.  I think I'll eat out tonight.

The spiritual life is a strange reality.  I have been living this way for a long time already, so I'm used to it.  But people around me don't understand or have a fear of death or have no faith, so the twisted reality freaks them out.  I'm not out to change their agendas.  I don't care about their agendas, as long as they don't conflict with mine.  I'm just trying to please Allah with music.  Oh wait... the entertainment business.  Yeah, I think it's saturated with evil, and I want to dismantle it.  But Allah is the One with the power to do so.  Since you are my wife inshaAllah, this reality may be too much for you at times.  But it is more interesting, and it does kick you upstairs.  Oh, I didn't do anything.  Allah helped you, then you put in the work.  Try to get used to it, OK?  Scrapper!  Have fun with your career.  I love you, and I need you.

Qur'an 20150927

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

1.  Say, "It has been revealed to me that a company of jinns listened.  They said, 'We have heard a wonderful recital!'"

The Jinns 67:1
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It has been revealed to me that a company of jinns listened.  They said, "We have heard a wonderful recital!"

Letter to Erin 20150926

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  Hi Sweetie!  How are you feeling today?  I pray you are feeling great.  I'm sitting here writing this letter while waiting for them to call the sunset prayer.  I had one steak left, so I just cooked it up and now it's sitting, waiting for me to cut it up after I finish prayer, to be eaten with a tortilla and some of my Mom's "rendang" sauce.  I chopped down some trees over at your house inshaAllah, so I have to burn them down not just to get them out of the way, but also to generate soil.  So I saved all the soil that was in the fire pit, so tomorrow I can burn all that stuff down.  It takes a lot of organic matter to make soil.  I have been generating soil since May, and I got 20 gallons of dirt.  That's 40 young mangoes.

Well, I'm sure you are doing well with your career, so praise be to Allah.  I want you to know that I love you, and I need you.  Please take good, loving care of yourself in my absence.

Letter to Erin 20150925

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hey there, my beautiful Erin!  How does it feel to be the most beautiful girl in the world?  All those other girls are so jealous of you, huh?  I didn't want to get involved in supermodel politics, but you are MY girl, and I want to take care of you.  And since you are MY girl, that makes you the most beautiful girl in the world to me.  Those other girls look like men to me.  I guess that's the advantage of being a male chauvinist pig, is that I like what I like, and I don't need to explain why.  So don't let them sway you with their jealousy, and rest assured that I love you and I need you.  Ya Allah, please protect my Erin.

I spent the evening chopping trees around your house inshaAllah.  A tree is a very heavy object.  Have you ever tried to lift one?  I could only manage the skinny trees just now.  There are a couple of huge trees that need to come down, but I will need the pros to take those down with chainsaws from the top down, as opposed to my hacking it at the trunk and not knowing where it's going to fall.  Actually there's a whole lot of trees I want to remove, because I want to build a brick wall.  Like Pink Floyd, I suppose.

My Dad gave me a whole chicken the other day.  Well it was chopped into smaller pieces, but not the usual cut I normally get.  I prefer white meat.  So after portioning it out and separating the meat from the bones, I had the liver, stomach and feet left.  I gave the feet to the cats, I threw away the stomach, and I had to use the liver immediately.  So for dinner, I chopped up the liver and mixed it with chopped Thai peppers, garlic, turmeric, salt and pepper.  I made 2 hash brown pancakes, and sandwiched the liver mix between them.  It was OK.  It would have been perfect, but I used too much salt.  Oh well.

Letter to Erin 20150924

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Ugh, I ate too much chili.  Too much of anything is too much (The Who).  I love chili, but I ate too much, plus tortillas.  So I woke up this morning feeling sick.  It's a good thing I didn't throw up, because that would have invalidated my fast.  Good chili, though.  Alhamdulillah.  But I'm not having it for dinner.  It's noodles instead.  Snapper roe in anchovy broth, with garlic, seaweed, roasted peppers and bamboo shoots.

And how are you today, my love?  How's life at the top?  I'm sure you are doing fine.  You're a very competent person with a good heart.  I want you to always know that I am with you.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150923

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  Hiya Sweetheart!  Mwah!  How are you today, my love?  Oh, supermodel politics.  I'll stay out of it, OK?  I just made a batch of chili.  I got tired of my chili not being hot enough, so I had a heaping handful of Thai peppers, and threw the whole lot in there without dicing it up or anything.  Yeah, good harvest today.  I'll be fasting, so I need chili because it's quick and easy and filling.  After you cook it the first time, that is.  And yeah, it was finally hot enough, but after I ate it, it wasn't hot enough.  We want that heat to linger!  But I don't think my garden can produce more peppers at a time like it did tonight.  I need to plant more, I suppose.  Hey Erin, I want you to know that YOU are MY girl, OK?  And that's my choice.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150922

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin.  How are you feeling right now?  I pray that you are feeling healthy and confident.  You are MY girl, and I want all the best for you.  I want you to know that you are not alone, you don't have to face them alone, because I am with you.  I may be in the shadows, but I am there, and always thinking of you.  You are the love of my life, and I need you.

Floofy is in heat right now.  Which is not a big deal, because there's always somebody in heat in my house.  She's not a howler like the other two.  She hasn't been eating much, because she throws it up.  She needs to be embraced, so I do that for her, and hopefully it's enough.  These cats like to plant their menses right where I can step on it.  Why is that?  Why can't they just use the cat box?  The favorite targets are my bedroom door, the toilet door, and the bathroom door, and one spot in the middle of the living room where I have to walk around the other spots in order to avoid them.  Does that make sense?  I'm vigilant with the mop, but I am at my most vulnerable when I just wake up for the dawn prayer.  I love my cats dearly, but I do have other things to do.  This evening I did some burning.  I need to get as much burning done before the next mango season because I need the dirt.  After this, I have to practice bass then do some encoding.  You take care now, Sweetie.

Letter to Erin 20150921

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Like I said before, my decision is to focus on Erin's happiness first.  Are you feeling like having kids right now?  Well, not right NOW.  I'm just guessing that you feel like it.  I do have a question though: what does an NFL blanket have to do with standing on a rock on the water at the beach in your bikini?  I guess if you fall into the water, it would keep you warm.  You're starting to look more like a mom, especially in that video.  A very beautiful mom.  I'm seeing your giving me 3 kids inshaAllah.  That's how I designed your house, is for 3 kids.  But there's a guest room downstairs.  I want to name our first son Muhammad, and our first daughter Mary.  You can name the rest of the kids.  I will look after you, inshaAllah.  I love you, and I need you.  Would you like a hug?

Letter to Erin 20150920

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello Erin.  How are you feeling, my darling?  I suppose you are very busy.  It's that time of year where you be sports rep, right?  Then it's the holiday shopping season.  I guess it's not going to pause much for you anytime soon.  Praise be to Allah.  Be sure you eat properly and get enough rest.  I love you, and I need you.

There's nothing special going on here.  I spent the morning running errands.  I took the weed whacker to the repair shop, went to the pharmacy, then the supermarket.  After voice training, I hosed down my Mom's kitchen floor.  Breakfast was a tortilla with marinara sauce, lunch was half a chicken breast, and dinner was 2 cups of steamed rice with anchovies.  That's nice and moderate, isn't it?  All this activity is making me lazy, though.

Letter to Erin 20150919

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Aaaaaarghh!!!  The grass cutter died again!  If it doesn't start tomorrow morning, I'm going to have to take it downtown.  One week of inactivity because of all that rain, and now it won't start.  I think that machine is a workaholic.  It wants to work until it dies, otherwise it dies.  Not like me- I'm a lazy butt.

Oh hi, Erin!  You're such a sweetheart, Erin.  Mwah!  I pray you're feeling well.  Are you eating properly, and getting enough rest?  I think after a certain point in life, we get eating habits that we inexplicably can't change.  Like a chronic dieter eventually cannot ingest any food at all.  I think the key is to eat the right amount every time.  Which is hard to gauge, because lust is involved.  I could easily down 2 dozen hot wings and a 12 inch pizza in one sitting, but I don't do that anymore.  I was telling Floofy this morning when I was cleaning out the cat box, "Look, this is the right amount of poop for you: just 2 average sized turds each day, because you're fat and you don't do anything but sleep all day.  You don't have to eat more than that, then puke it out!"  Not that I'm saying that you do the same thing Floofy does, but you're smart and experienced enough to know what sustains you through work and makes you happy, now that you're a sensitive and feminine movie star.  So please take care of your precious self, and be balanced OK?  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150918

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hey there, my darling Erin Sweetie!  How are you feeling, my beloved?  I want you to know how beautiful you are, and how cute you look with blue hair.  I love you with all my heart, and I need you.  Don't ever get plastic surgery, because you don't need it OK?  Please age naturally and gracefully, for it is the most dignified and beautiful.  I will take care of you inshaAllah.

How's your tummy doing?  Are you having trouble digesting food?  Last night I had severe heartburn, or gastritis. or acid reflux disease.  Gastritis is dangerous because persistent gastritis causes ulcers and stomach cancer.  But since I do my own cooking I hardly ever get heartburn, and I didn't eat anything to warrant it last night.  Everything was mild.  Just sliced chicken breast, scrambled eggs and lettuce in a tortilla.  This is because yesterday was very stressful compounded with my being sick, and that affected my sensitive stomach.  The more successful you get, it will affect your stomach.  So please try to prepare your own meals whenever possible, and focus on what doesn't hurt your tummy.  A back massage would help relax your stomach.  If I had known I would get heartburn last night, I would have eaten only plain bread or plain steamed rice.  If you don't have time to cook, then please keep it simple.  Eat only at places you trust.

Letter to Erin 20150917

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Good evening, my dearest Erin!  What a day, huh?  It's cold, grey, and surreal here right now.  I like the cold.  I heat up pretty quickly, so I prefer the cold.  I still have a fever, but it's not so bad, so I stopped taking drugs, but it doesn't feel like it.  I made chicken and egg burritos for dinner.  I gave Floofy some chicken.  She likes my cooking.  Would you like some?  I love you, and I need you.

I had just been watching the Yardbirds story.  Look, it's Nigel Tufnel!  I guess I am an old school type of musician.  But that's not entirely true: I'm too young to be in a classic rock band, and too old to be in any sort of band.  Plus, I have no friends.  What would I play if I joined a classic rock band?  Guitar?  Bass?  Drums?  Sing?  I would be relegated to bass I'm sure. so the icons can shine again.  That's the problem of being in a band, it's a battle of egos.  I played bass when I was in a band long ago, because I wanted to be humble and let it be all about "the band".  But the egos always seem to take over, regardless of whether or not people in the band are financially secure.  Especially when the people are talented.  Egos.  Dog eaters.  Do I have an ego?  I'm not perfect, so I'm sure I do.  Ya Allah, please forgive me for my flaws.  I just want to make music my own way, because I'm an old man.  I just want to stick to my own agenda.  Plus, I don't have to tour.  I think I'll play some guitar tonight.  Just for fun.

Letter to Erin 20150916

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi there, beautiful girl!  How is the most beautiful girl in the world feeling today?  I love you so much.  Of course, I need you.  Oh me?  I still have a fever.  It has been raining a lot.  I'm certain this is the same storm that hit Mecca on Saturday, but watered down for us in Perlis because God is being nice.  There's something in the air that my nose can't handle, but I managed to get through voice training without getting a heart attack, and now I'm starting to feel better.  I think singing is therapeutic.  I'm still a bit woozy, but I'm starting to meow again.

I had to eat a lot to give the fever something to burn.  Lunch was pretty good.  I made those sausage and tofu burritos in marinara sauce again, with fresh tomatoes and roasted peppers.  Tofu and marinara sauce is a perfect match.  You must try it sometime.  Dinner was beef and potatoes with tortillas.  Very filling.  Very filling.

Letter to Erin 20150915

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello there, my beloved Erin.  How are you feeling today?  I pray that you are feeling healthy and confident, because I love you and I need you.  As for me, the sniffles progressed into a fever, but I'm OK.  There's nothing all too special going on over here today, my love.  My budget doesn't permit spending right now, so I'm eating what I already have.  For dinner I had fries.  Yeah, just plain fries: potatoes sliced into strips and tossed in corn flour, then fried to a golden brown.  Lunch was more interesting.  I steamed the snapper head to be used as broth for my noodles.  The best part of the snapper head is the meat behind the eyes!  Never give that to a cat!

Letter to Erin 20150914

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin.  Yeah, I'm feeling a bit sedate.  Ever since I became a better singer, my nose became more sensitive.  Much of my voice goes out my nose, you see.  So a bit of dust from cleaning my parents' bedroom this morning gave me the sniffles.  **sniffle**.  Again.  I don't know if I would get through my Hajj without incident.  Anyway, I had to dump my sinus fluids again.  But this time I measured the procedure: it took 90 minutes for a complete dump, for half a cup of snot.  Ick.  But I'm firmly convinced that infected sinus fluids are extremely dangerous, and tissue papers don't do an adequate job of removing and suppressing.  Of course the body regenerates the stuff, but at least most of the infected snot is out of the way.

But anyway, I didn't feel like cooking in the evening.  So I went to Ina's for rice, but she had sold out twice today.  So I cooked up some potatoes and sausage for dinner.  Tasted OK.  Filling.  I'm going to take it easy tonight.  I pray you are feeling healthy and confident.  You are my beautiful Erin.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150913

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

From Allah is our origin, and to Allah is our return.

Can you imagine?  2 million people all in one spot.  Not housed in buildings spread over a few miles, but in one house.  The house of Allah.  One can only conjecture why Allah blew a giant storm over Mecca during the peak of the Hajj.  What can you do?  With 2 million people all crammed in one house, you have to expand.  Then comes Judgement Day.

You know something?  If I can afford to build your house, that means I can afford to do my Hajj.  And I want to do my Hajj while I still have some strength.  I don't want to get squashed.  And it's HOT.  But I don't want to leave you by yourself.  So if I'm allowed to go, then I'm taking you with me.  The Hajj isn't a romantic getaway, it's a mandatory workload for Muslims who are able and can afford the journey.  Hard work.  I would keep you very close to me at all times.  In a crowd of 2 million people, I'm going to have to keep you close to me at all times.  We would get separated at Safa' and Marwah, but don't go anywhere!  Wait for me right here while I make my round, I'll be right back.  I don't know if we would get an air conditioned hotel room with running water, but we'll try to bring the walkie talkies.  No, it's not supposed to be fun.  This is supposed to be work, and those who ask for payback in this life will have no share in the hereafter.  You are my wife, inshaAllah.  I want you to be with me.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150912

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi there, my dearest Erin!  How are you feeling today?  I pray you are feeling healthy and confident.  It's just another average day for me.  The rain finally ceased, so after the dawn prayer I went to the market.  Ah!  Snapper!  And within my budget, too.  I scored a 2 kilo fish.  The tuna today was huge, and cheaper, but I wanted snapper.  I also bought some won ton skins, tofu, and garlic.  One thing about fish is that it has to be processed.  I had trouble doing that indoors because it's a big fish, and messy, and I have cats in heat inside the house.  So I scaled and gutted the fish in the motorcycle cage, isolated from menacing beasts.  I filleted the snapper inside the house, after locking up the kittens in a bedroom.  Not Floofy, though.  She's very controlled and well behaved.  Except when she sees a lizard on the screen door.  And she's very sensitive about her blubber.  But fat cats are so cute!  Anyway, I had almost a kilo of sashimi for lunch.  All arranged nicely on a square plate and marinated with squid sauce.  One thing about fresh sashimi is that it's pure food: no poop!

After voice training, I gave my Dad a leg massage then cut the grass over at your house inshaAllah.  I cleared out the back yard, the part unseen from the road.  And scored more young coconuts for my Mom.  Dinner was an experiment: sausage and tofu burritos in marinara sauce.  It worked!  Sausage is a perfect match with tofu, especially with marinara sauce!  It was awesome alhamdulillah!  Sorry, I ate yours!  I thought to myself, "Well, sausage goes well with beans, so why not tofu?"  I make one for you, inshaAllah.  I love you, and I need you.  Oh my God, I need a nap.

Letter to Erin 20150911

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello, my darling.  It's nice not to be alone, isn't it?  Well yeah, we're not married yet.  But you know, or you feel, for sure that I love you and am with you.  And I need you.  What you feel is faith, so please be sure to maintain your prayers.  In the meantime, have fun with your career, and stash a whole lot of money for yourself while you can, OK?

It's been raining all day again, and the weather is wonderful.  Well, I like it.  Most women I know don't like cold weather, but I heat up really easily, so I prefer cold weather.  I slept in again, oh how lazy.  Then I'm kind of hooked on "Lair Defense" right now, so I've been playing that.  Oh, don't worry about your house plan.  I've already taken all the screenshots.  All I need is to label everything, then it will be ready in time for presentation to you inshaAllah.  For you to reject, nonetheless.  But it is your house, my darling.  But since you have your own house plan, please try to get it as early as possible to me, so I can be slow and meticulous OK?

Letter to Erin 20150910

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Sweetie!  How are you feeling?  It's been raining all day here today, ever since the dawn prayer.  I love the rain.  It cools everything down.  Ya Allah, thank you for the rain.  Of course, I don't want to get flooded.  But it hasn't flooded around here in 5 years, I think.  Since the local government upgraded the drainage ditches.  I didn't do much cooking today.  My Mom gave me some rice from a local merchant, but I was still hungry.  So I cooked up a late dinner.  Sausage and egg stuffed pizza.  I just discovered a healthy and natural way to get rid of gas: coriander seed!  I wonder if it works on gastritis and diarrhea too.  That's one of the advantages of knowing how to cook and feeding myself: I rarely get stomach ailments even though I have a very sensitive stomach.  Alhamdulillah.  Are you having time to practice cooking?  Remember to use a medium flame at the most until have you have total confidence!  I curious to try your cuisine.  I love you, and I need you.

Oh, it's movie night!  Remember I told you about P.Ramlee, one of Malaysia's most respected artistes.  Last night I watched this movie, and I think it's such a masterpiece.  It's so bizarre, and in a serious way.  P.Ramlee is usually known for his comedy.  It's a great representation of how Asians regard the supernatural.  Sorry, no subtitles.  Oh, it's been such a lazy day!  The rain made it nice and cool, and I've been lazing around all day.  What a great day.  Alhamdulillah.  Can't do much of anything in the rain, so I just lay around on the floor all day.  You wanna be a lazy girl with me?  Maybe I'll paint your face and dress you up nice and pretty.  Or I'll just play a video game.  Usually, the day is but striving towards you.  So let's strive toward each other.  InshaAllah, God will bring us together.

Letter to Erin 20150909

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I would like to remind you not to rely on anyone here regarding the matters of our marriage, especially the legal paperwork.  I don't trust anyone here to do that, so I will have to do it myself.  If you want to talk to the Malaysian Embassy over there regarding whatever then that's fine, just don't rely on anyone here.  When the time comes inshaAllah and we are talking to each other regularly on the phone, I will tell you what I need you to do, and we can have a safe and happy wedding inshaAllah.  Most of all, be patient and pray.  For if Allah wills reward or punishment for someone, then no one can stop it.  The same if God guides someone, then no one can lead him/her astray.  It doesn't matter who the detractors are, or how smart or qualified they think they are.

It's just another average day for me.  Lunch was beef and potatoes, and dinner is beef and rice.  I spent the evening doing some burning.  I pray you are taking good care of yourself, and getting plenty of rest.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150908

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I'm sure you are hooked on white sandy beaches by now.  I mentioned before that if you love tropical beaches, then Langkawi is very close by.  Just a couple hours by boat and we're there.  Quicker by hydrofoil.  Langkawi caters to many westerners, so the sight of you won't bug the eyes out too much of the locals, but everyone will know who you are because of your marriage.  Langkawi is a tourist trap, so everything is expensive.  Bring your own drinking water.  I haven't been there in decades, but from what I hear they've managed to keep it very clean.  Thailand also has great beaches, but it's a longer journey and I don't speak Siamese.  You'll be recognized there too, because many Siamese hang out here.  Phuket is the place to be, that's where they filmed that James Bond movie.

Everything changes after marriage.  You can't expect to keep some of the same habits you did before you got married.  This means that if you want to swim at the beach, you're going to have to wear a scuba outfit instead of a swimsuit.  There is no more incognito for you, Erin.  And even if people did not know who you are, the locals here can get very jealous of your beauty.  Once a white woman in a bikini got murdered in Thailand, and the cops said it was because she was beautiful.  If she had been fat and ugly, no one would have looked twice.  Don't get me wrong, I would love to see the waves spank your butt and make the flesh ripple (in fact I may just loop that for my own pleasure), but there will be no more showing off, despite the fact that I would love to show you off.  You're just too beautiful.  And so is your butt.  I love you.  I love your butt.  And I need you.  If you want, we can set up a wave generator in your house that's hooked up to a spanking machine.  Is 50 hertz OK?

But seriously, when I look at these photos I get concerned about the curvature of your spine.  There's no need to exaggerate your posture to emphasize your butt.  Your butt is so beautiful, it speaks for itself.  Don't you get lower back pains?  You're still young.  When we are married inshaAllah, I will lay you down on a flat surface so I can massage your back.  No, no padding.  No mattress.  A simple mat on a hard concrete floor.  Well, enough talk about this.  Please excuse me, I have to go make a batch of dough.

Letter to Erin 20150907

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Well, you have to be somewhat of an actor in order to sing well.  But I don't know if what I do is acting.  The need for emotional connection is too important, plus there's too much reality involved to make it fiction.  MashaAllah.  Art is life, and life is art.  Which is yet another reason why I try to write music slowly.  Besides my being a lazy slob.

I'm sorry but I don't feel very talkative today.  The air conditioner crisis gave me the sniffles, compounded by rain last night, so I had to drain my sinus cavity yet again.  ** sniffle**  Since my singing improved, I became more sensitive to climate change.  If you're planning to manipulate me into doing more travel than I want to, it might backfire on you.  You might make me too sick to work, or dead.  No, I'm not going to allow you all to travel alone.  This is because I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150906

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Football season already?  I'm sorry I'm not a sports fan.  I've never chased after athletes, and athletes don't chase after me.  That makes you the sports fan of the family, plus you used to be an athlete.  That's why all the sports businesses chase after you, because you are the only link into the music that they have.  Make sure you charge them an arm and a leg, OK?  No freebies!

The remote control of my AC died gradually.  Now my AC is on all the time, and I have to rely on the on board computer chip to regulate the temperature in my bedroom because I don't dare shut it off, because I may not be able to turn it back on again.  I hate hot weather.  I wouldn't mind living in Alaska, like in "Northern Exposure".  But I love the kampung, and my AC still works.  Alhamdulillah.

Are you aware that most people have to put up a facade in order to function in society?  I'm sure you know that.  Many actors and politicians function that way.  Always putting up an act.  But who are we to condemn them?  Allah knows who is pure at heart, not us.  See the woman with a million faces, which one is the pure heart?  Sincerity may be first and second nature for you and me, but not for most others.  We do have that in common, don't we?  I love you, and I need you.  As an actress, you may have to act by channeling as opposed to analysis.

Qur'an 20150906

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

23.  Say, "It is God Who has created you, and made for you the faculties of hearing, sight, feeling and understanding.  Little thanks it is you give."

24.  Say, "It is God Who has multiplied you through the earth, and to God shall you be gathered together."

25.  They ask, "When will this promise be, if you are telling the truth?"

26.  Say, "As to the knowledge of the time, it is with Allah alone.  I am only to warn plainly in public."

27.  At length when they see it close at hand. grieved will be the faces of the unbelievers, and it will be said, "This is what you were calling for!"

28.  Say, "Do you see?  If Allah were to destroy me and those with me, or if God bestows God's mercy on us, yet who can deliver the unbelievers from a grievous penalty?"

29.  Say, "God is the Most Gracious.  We have believed in God, and on God have we put our trust.  So, soon will you know who it is that is in manifest error."

30.  Say, "Do you see?  If your streams be some morning lost, who then can supply you with clear flowing water?"

The Dominion 67:23-29
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It is God Who has created you, and made for you the faculties of hearing, sight, feeling and understanding.  Little thanks it is you give.

It is God Who has multiplied you through the earth, and to God shall you be gathered together.

As to the knowledge of the time, it is with Allah alone.  I am only to warn plainly in public."

Do you see?  If Allah were to destroy me and those with me, or if God bestows God's mercy on us, yet who can deliver the unbelievers from a grievous penalty?

God is the Most Gracious.  We have believed in God, and on God have we put our trust.  So, soon will you know who it is that is in manifest error.

Do you see?  If your streams be some morning lost, who then can supply you with clear flowing water?

Letter to Erin 20150905

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How are you feeling today, my beloved Rock and Roll Princess?  I'm doing OK.  I just finished dinner, it was steak, onions, peppers on flat bread.  Nothing too special, but you're welcome to share my food.  I spent the evening clearing out scrub over at your house inshaAllah to make way for the weed whacker.  Then I looked up, and saw a bunch of young coconuts.  My Mom loves young coconut juice and flesh.  She says that it's a panacea or fountain of youth or something like that.  So I climbed the tree with my grandfather's old ladder, hung to the tree with my left hand and cut through the bunch of fruit with a saw on a stick using my right hand..  That was tough work, but I got all the fruit down.  It turned out that the coconuts were at the perfect age, where the flesh was soft and sweet and the juice even sweeter, and the size yielded the maximum amount of juice.  You must try some sometime.

I don't normally do this, but I'm going to give you a forecast for September, because what is about to occur involves you, and you are my wife inshaAllah, and I love you and I need you.  There will be a face off between the three major religions of God: Judaism, Christianity, and Islam.  This is because of your elevated power, and each side is vying for your open conversion.  This will be a short situation during September, and occur again in about 6 to 8 months time.  Being vague will make this a rougher ride for you.  The solution is to choose Islam.  After all, I cannot be married to a non-Muslim.  Point your finger at me and say to them, "He is my husband inshaAllah," send them to me, and I will distract them away from you inshaAllah.

Letter to Erin 201509034

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

One thing is for sure little fish, you're not the same girl I proposed to almost two years ago.  If you don't believe what I say, then compare yourself in the backstage video of the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show 2013 with any video you've been in this year.  It's as if you've been supercharged with power.  Don't lose your sweetness, OK?  Oh, I didn't do anything.  Make sure you give thanks to Allah.  I'm just the one who loves you and needs you.

It seems to me that you don't entirely understand what I do.  So let me tell you a story.  About 60 years ago, Elvis came along and there was Rock and Roll music.  Great!  Then the Beatles came along, then more musical icons appeared.  Music back then was recorded on vinyl discs, and a lot of those were sold plus royalties from mass media, making heaps of money for businesses bankrolling, reproducing and distributing music.  Then as time passed by, it was discovered that only few musical icons had sufficient propaganda power to push product and make fruitful endorsements.  Soon the computer was born, the compact disc came into being, then the mp3 was created: a recording which could exist virtually, and in a small size.  You were about 10 years old when the mp3 came about, old enough to enjoy music without caring about past mediums.  Most human ears don't really care about audio quality past the mp3 anyway, plus it could be duplicated, making the way for billions of free copies of music.  Thus the death of the marketable music product, cds and vinyl discs being sold only to people who cared to pay for it.  Very few people.  Since materialists are too stupid to think past "cash on the table", the business mobs were too late to stop the digital revolution.  Sure they tried to make people pay for downloads.  Did that work?

Well, no.  But the business mobs still had their power, and music still has propaganda power, because good music will always be in demand.  So the business mobs decide who will be the icons that make fruitful endorsements and live appearances thereof.  Thus Allah granted me music and the endorsement power thereof, and gave me the order, by inspiration, to stand my ground here in this kampung in Malaysia, so I could:

1.  Empower Islam over all other religions.
2.  Empower the rural over the urban.
3.  Empower small businesses over the banks and the executives.

InshaAllah.

I had crab for dinner.  I had over half a kilo of crab abdomens in the freezer, you know the fleshiest part of the crab.  So I split each one in two, rolled them around in corn starch, then deep fried them to a crisp to be tossed in my home made hot sauce.  Like buffalo wings.  Crab comes with a lot of garbage, though.  Not like fish, where I can fillet it and gut it, then use the bones for broth.  I can't eat all the shells of the abdomens, I would get a stomach ache.  I can't reuse the shells.  So I crunched through most of the flesh and shell, and used a trash bag for the excess.  Yeah, crab has a lot of garbage.  Would you like to eat crab with me?

Letter to Erin 20150903

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  Hi Boss Model!  How are you feeling today, dearest heart?  Are you being a good girl?  For the righteous, their portions are gardens and companions holy.  I want you to know that you have my devotion and my support, and that I love you very much.  And I need you.

It's been a very busy day in the kitchen for me.  Yeah a little knowledge goes a long way, and preparing foods from scratch is superior in quality and value, but it sure eats up a lot of time.  It's the processing of raw foods that takes forever.  I bought a kilo of crab from the Tuesday market.  Tropical crab is annoying because it's so small, not like king or dungeness crab.  Eating it is tedious, and processing it is worse.  What I did with the crab I got was to first separate the legs and claws from the body.  The crab didn't have their helmets because they were sold that way, which is a shame because I wanted the brains.  So I put away the abdomen parts, then squeezed all the meat out of the legs and claws.  The legs are small and skinny, but if you're patient then the meat accumulates.  Tedious!

Then I made marinara sauce.  Trimming the basil took a long time, then I had to run to the supermarket to get tomato soup and fresh tomatoes.  Then come back to stuff everything in the blender and mix it up.  At least my marinara sauce doesn't need cooking- it's ready to go for whatever Italian whatnots and whatevers.  Whoops, redundant!  Yeah, that and later on in the evening, I find my tomatoes about to ripen.  I should have made marinara sauce tomorrow.  Whoops, past future!

I also made fresh sausage.  Home made halal beef sausage.  A batch of sausage goes a long way, and is very versatile.  I made a batch of fresh dough a couple of days ago, and now it's perfect to use.  For dinner I had sausage rolls with marinara sauce.  Would you like to have some?

Hmm.  It's time to try making home made chocolate bars again.  But not tonight.

Letter to Erin 20150902

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello there, my dearest Erin.  How does it feel to be Top Cat?  Floofy is Top Cat in my house, and nowadays I have to call her "mam".  Yes, Mam.  No, Mam.  Now don't rush things.  Take your time.  Enjoy your position.  Everyone else is in a hurry, but not you.  Because they are waiting for you.  You are MY girl.  I love you, and I need you.

Let's talk a little about charity work.  I believe that the best kind of charity, from us in particular, is charity done in silence and in secret.  Don't advertise your plans for acts of kindness.  If you need to be ambassador for something, then at the most beyond a simple donation, just lend them your name and effort.  For example, don't have your face printed on a T-shirt and given as advertising for charity.  That just seems insincere.  Don't give reminders of your kindness, because it nullifies the act of kindness.  InshaAllah you are forgiven for the past, but from now on please follow this procedure.

Don't forget that Muslim women keep their names after they marry.  So you might as well maintain your business and diversify.  There will be no more travel after we marry, but people can come to you, plus you still have mass media.  I'm sorry to be Alpha Male about this, but my orders are to stand my ground here, and you are my wife.  You will remain here with me.  Of course there can be vacation times so you can visit your loved ones, but they have to be well planned with security taken in serious regard.  Please don't get us killed or kidnapped.