Letter to Erin 20150901

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How is the most beautiful girl in the world feeling today?  I pray you are taking your position as Boss Model seriously.  Because you are MY girl, and I don't want people treating you like a victim.  It's just another average day for me.  Another average day in the life of an average squirt.  I'll admit that I'm a squirt.  When we get together for full body contact sports inshaAllah, I'll show you.  I love you, and I need you.

I finally have enough peppers to harvest, so for dinner tonight it's pepper steak on rice.  Super hot and yummy.  I don't believe there's anything wrong with eating meat as long as it's halal.  Protein helps build and form muscle, and I don't want you to be too thin.  Moderation is the key.  I wouldn't want you to get fat either.  Now Floofy is a fat cat.  But that's OK because fat cats are cute, but fat humans are not.  The body you had for the SI swimsuit shoot was SEXY.  Granted sometimes you just don't feel good, and I don't mean to be insensitive or rude.  I'm just trying to express what I like, and perhaps you would know what the limits are so you don't lose energy, health, and self esteem.  Aaaaa!  Forget it!  I'll just compensate by becoming obese!

Lunch was a couple of "pekasam" fish and garlic potatoes.  Floofy in her infinite wisdom expressed that she didn't like my breath by eating some cat food, licking her butt, then breathing into my face.  Cat thinks she knows it all.  I'm broke and alone right now, so I'm certainly not going to gargle with mouthwash after every meal just to please a cat.  I'm not out to please humans either, because I already know who I want to marry.  When we are married, I promise you I will always have economy sized bottles of Listerine around to keep my breath minty fresh inshaAllah.

While it is undeniable how beautiful you are, what is more important to me is your Islam.  You don't have to be an extremist, just do the best you can with what Allah has given you.  Your piety will amplify your beauty, and I want people to recognize you for your goodness over your sexiness.

Letter to Erin 20150831

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How is the most beautiful girl in the world feeling today?  You are MY girl, and that makes you the most beautiful girl in the world to me.  You have my solemn promise that I will marry you inshaAllah, and mashaAllah if I have any power, then that also makes you Boss Model.  I love you, and I need you.

Bob Cat's shoulder is much better today.  The swelling has gone down, and he's walking effortlessly.  Apparently the actual cut was to his right armpit, and it affected his entire shoulder.  What a crafty foe he has.  While he was locked up overnight recuperating, his enemy came and muttered threats at him.  But my Bobby seems A OK today.  What a fast healer.  Alhamdulillah.

Tomorrow is Independence Day for Malaysia.  I plan to just stay home, and cut grass in the evening if it doesn't rain.  This morning I went to the Sunday market.  I don't normally go because I usually clean my parents' bedroom, but I postponed that to the evening.  I bought some prawn croquettes, and some salted fish.  Actually the fish is marinated in some sort of tamarind salt mix.  It's called "pekasam" in the local lingo, and the fish is a common freshwater fish called "puyu", which you would see the locals fishing for in the drainage ditches.  It's best as a crispy fry.  Folks generally eat it with steamed rice, but I prefer it as a snack.  It's the closest thing I can get to blue cheese around here.  I'll bet it would even go great on a salad as a substitute to blue cheese.  But I don't gamble.

Letter to Erin 20150830

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello there, my beautiful Erin.  Are you feeling safe and secure?  I'll do my best to help protect you, but don't forget that Allah is the Best to protect.  You are MY girl, and I love you very much.  And I need you.

It seems that my Bob Cat wasn't able to beat that other cat, the brownish-black striped cat with a stubby tail.  This time he got nailed in the shoulder, and it's all swollen.  I had to ice it down, and keep Bobby in prison for a while.  I suppose he was afraid of that other cat when he allowed it to eat from his cat food.  Don't worry Bobby.  We'll get him, inshaAllah.  He's always getting nailed, or perhaps he shouldn't get nailed at all so I don't notice it.  That's the problem with being a fighter: beat one cat, and another cat comes along.  Maybe he'll become a smarter fighter with experience.  He used to get hurt in the foot repeatedly, he got punched in the eye once, and this shoulder injury is new.  What would you do if you had a son who is a natural fighter?  Would you imprison him, or back him up?  Well, Bobby is in prison right now for his own protection.  He got hurt.

I went downtown this morning to pay bills and get a haircut.  They were having drills for a local Independence Day parade, but I had stuff to do so I didn't watch.  I went to one of my usual eateries for flat bread and curry, but they were closed.  So I had breakfast at KFC instead.  I don't think you would recognize the breakfast menu at a KFC here.  Rice with almost everything.  It was as if they were competing with McDonald's and catering to the local palate at the same time.  I didn't want rice.  I would have preferred two breasts, but you know how these places get militant about their breakfast menu.  Thus I had a something of a chicken and egg sandwich.  Small.  Expensive.

Letter to Erin 20150829

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

EEYOW!!  EEYOOO!!  EEYOW!!  EEYOOO!!  EEYOW!!  EEYOOO!!  EEYOW!!  EEYOOO!! 

Did I mention that I'm setting up an indoor grill today?  I have this wok with a heavy glass lid that used to belong to my Mom.  So I picked a couple of bunches of "pandan" leaves (commonly used to intensify the sweetness of cakes), chopped them up and put them at the bottom of the wok, then placed a round grill on top of them, set the fire to low, put the cover on then left it to warm up.  I'm grilling a fish!
 
EEYOW!!  EEYOOO!!  EEYOW!!  EYOOO!!  EEYOW!!  EEYOOO!!  EEYOW!!  EEYOOO!! 

Oh dear, the cats are going berserk.  I had removed the head and the tail of the scad I bought the other day, also I had eaten some of the meat as sashimi which left plenty of room for the stuffing.  I had some dessicated coconut in the freezer which I had fried up with chilli puree and lime juice.  I refried it with garlic, more chilli paste, and kaffir lime leaves.  I stuffed the fish with it plus the roe and liver, and now it's on the stove top cooking away.  I'll enjoy it after the sunset prayer inshaAllah.  Come and share it with me!  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150828

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

**sniffle**  I got the sniffles again.  All the recent weather distortion is definitely not normal, and my body is struggling to adjust.  It's not the indoors atmosphere either, because the sneezing intensifies when I go outside.  And I can hear my parents sneezing more than usual next door.  I'm writing today's letter later than usual because I had to take the time to drain my sinus cavity.  Yeah it's gross, but I am responsible to Allah for protecting the music, in this case my voice.  Aaaa! I made the eggs, but I forgot to put it in my "chicken and egg" sandwiches!  **sniffle**

What's causing this weather distortion anyway?  Of course Allah controls the weather, by changing conditions on the earth to affect the state of the atmosphere.  Volcanic eruptions, meteors, earthquakes, etc.  Oh yeah, God created humans as well: pollution, bombs, depletion of natural resources, etc.  The intense cannonade of World War One caused the freezing swamp that was France.  Could it be that the spin of the earth on its axis is changing direction oh so slightly?  Right now prayer times are still the same and synchronized with the sun, as far as I can see.  But when the spin changes direction, of course there will be weather distortion.  Even oh so slightly.  We're all so so fragile.  But why would the spin of the earth on its axis change direction?  Come on humans, guess!

Whoops, I'm rambling.  I'll shut up now.  **sniffle**  I going to lay my bed down now, and relax.  Play "Lair Defense".  I have the feeling that travel is going to be very hard on me now that my voice has advanced: I've become a super sensitive chick singer diva.  Good thing I'm a "Man in a Box".  When we are married, please don't force travel on me.  Please?  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150827

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin, my beloved!  How is the most beautiful girl in the world feeling today?  You are MY girl, Erin.  Mine, mine, MINE.  Oh, it's just another average day for me.  Just another average day in the average life of yet another average Joe.  I've been getting the dates of these letters wrong lately.  Duh.  I'm a senile old man.  It's all the same old day, anyway.

It did clear up somewhat in the evening, enough for me to cut the grass over at your house inshaAllah.  There was also a group of banana trees behind my house that was attracting thick vines, and that was bothering me so I chopped all that down.  I also got rid of a spiny palm that was growing right at the neighbor's fence.  Once all that got down, it immediately started to rain.  Heavily.  The whole village was enveloped in a grey, thick fog.  Like London in winter.  Well, not that cold.  I didn't see any ravens, though.

I didn't feel like cooking anything for dinner, but I couldn't go out because it was pouring.  So I finished off the leftover chili.  Cold.  I didn't feel like cooking.  But it wasn't enough, because I was ravenous for some reason.  I had a leftover steak in the freezer, so I had to heat that up.  Good thing it was already cooked.  I guess this means I don't have anything special cooked up to share with you.  But I would have shared my cold chili and steak with you if you had been here.  You're such a sweetheart, Erin.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150826

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How are you feeling today, my darling?  It' s been raining again today, so I just stayed in and watched TV in the evening since I couldn't do any grass cutting.  I did see a large black bird enjoying some food on the lawn of your house inshaAllah.  It was unlikely to be a raven here in Malaysia, but it was definitely bigger than a crow and it has been cold around here lately.  I remember ravens being plentiful when I was still in Arizona, and they were there all year long.  Fascinating birds.  I've always wanted a baby raven.

The morning was clear and dry, and my Mom wanted me to get her some onions, and she treated me to a fish at the Tuesday market.  That's where I usually get my beef.  But today I score a medium large scad, and it was fresh and cold, so I knew it would great to eat.  I had been craving sashimi lately.  There are better fish for sashimi, but this scad was so fresh and the size was perfect for sashimi, because the huge scad taste very strong while the small ones are tasteless.  Hardtail scad is best for grilling, but I took out half the meat and marinated it in squid sauce and lime juice.  Squid sauce?  A common Siamese condiment, very salty on flavor.  The lime juice is very potent, so it effective cooked the fish meat, so my sashimi was very palatable.  I'll probably grill the rest.  I think I'll try to set up an indoors grill- no charcoal!

But how are you doing, Sweetheart?  I hope you are relaxed and happy.  You are my girl, and I love you and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150825

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How are you feeling, my dearest?  It's 5 pm on Monday here right now.  It's been raining today, and it feels so humid that I'm guessing the rain is going to continue.  I had planned to do some grass cutting, but I'll procrastinate like I so love to do.  I wanted pepper steak on rice for dinner again today, but I had been guzzling all the Thai peppers in my garden that there's none for harvest today.  Sure I could spend a dollar for peppers at the night market, but there's no need.  I'll just wait 2 days then I'll have enough peppers to harvest, inshaAllah.  So it's leftover chili for dinner tonight.  I have a lot.  You want some?  Food is love!  I love you, and I need you.

My Bob Cat is all grown up now: he's one year old, and is a big tough boy.  But lately he's been allowing this other brown striped cat with a stubby tail to eat from his cat food.  I asked him, "Why don't you chase that guy away like you do the other cats?  You can beat him!"  Is he afraid of him?  Bobby just stretched out on the ground and yawned.  So I chased that other cat away, and Bobby followed me in harassing him, hackles up and all.  God was with that other cat this time, and all my rocks missed.  But I'm not going to miss all the time, inshaAllah.  Go ahead and take me for granted, one day I'm going to bullseye him and he's not going to like it one bit.  But is Bobby afraid of him?  Only a fool is without fear, but I don't think that's the case here.  I think that President Bobby is trying to be political.  Oh please!  I hate politics!

Letter to Erin 20150824

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How are you feeling today, Sweetie?  It's just another everyday day for me.  I was busy all morning.  I'm busy every Sunday morning.  Little ---- has calmed down from her heat, and now ------- is going into heat.  I can tell because she's amped up her naughtiness, and sticking her claws into me when I ignore her.  It's like a tag team- there's always somebody in heat around here.  I had chili for lunch, and stuffed won tons for dinner.  Yeah, just another day.  It's all the same old day.  Then comes Judgement Day.  I'm going to practice my bass now, so please excuse me.  I pray you are well, and taking care of yourself.  I love you, and I need you.

Erin, please make a donation to a worthwhile charity of a minimum of one US dollar.

Letter to Erin 20150823

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Somehow I get the feeling that you are going to reject my house plan no matter how awesome it may be because you already have a plan of your own.  But you would still expect me to have my presentation ready for you when the time comes, so you can reject it.  That's just mean, Erin.  But it is your house after all, so your house plan supercedes mine.  Just remember that I am the one who will be the one who finances and supervises the construction inshaAllah, and there are some practical elements you need to pay attention to.  For example, you can't just put a bathroom wherever you feel like it.  All sewage and drainage pipes must be concentrated on the west side of the house, that's the side farthest from the street.  That means all the bathrooms, kitchens, and laundry rooms must be on the west side.  Another thing is that you can't have a basement, because of flooding which is common around here.  Stuff like that.

I went to the market downtown after the dawn prayer this morning.  There were so much snapper there, Erin.  Big, fat, fresh ones.  I'm glad the fishery department is managing the popular species so that they don't get overfished.  But I couldn't afford one.  **sob**  A kilo of sashimi would have hit the spot.  Instead I bought some chicken breast, tofu, and won ton skins.  For dinner I made chili, and lots of it.  I find that simple recipes are the best for chili.  Canned baked beans in tomato sauce, ground beef, onion, garlic, black pepper, hot red chilli pepper puree, and lots of Thai peppers.  The canned beans don't need salt, and don't need to cook for hours.  I want to try a chili with tofu in it.  What do you think?  Soybeans, pinto beans... what's the difference?  Would you like some chili with a fresh tortilla?  I have a lot!  I love you Erin, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150822

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How are you feeling today?  You're probably all excited, huh?  Please be patient.  Don't be like one of those "Behind The Music" documentaries, where the musician's life flashes by in half an hour.  3 times.  There's a lot going on, a lot to be done, and a lot that I need to acquire before I build your house.  But it's all out of love, my love for you, my dearest wife.  I love you, and I need you.

Whoops!  I forgot the laundry room!  Very important.  I had to take away one of the guest bedrooms to make a laundry room.  The options here for clothes dryers are limited as for now: electric only.  I'm not too comfortable, and perhaps you wouldn't be, with your hanging your clothes outside on a clothes line like everybody else.  It's because you're a famous lingerie model made more famous by marrying some rock star.  We could possibly string up a line inside the house.

For dinner, it's fried rice with fried calamari.  We can get it done quickly if you fry the calamari downstairs, while I fry the rice upstairs.  How about dinner on the upstairs patio overlooking the garden?  There's just room enough for two there.  If you want to barbecue, it's going to have to be downstairs.  But I feel like seafood tonight.  Oh no, reality!  I ate all of the dinner!

This house of yours is part of my vision and my mission, and this is the place where I make my stand.  None but Allah shall make me change my place.

Qur'an 20150822

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

7.  The unbelievers think that they will not be raised up.  Say, "Yes by my Lord, you shall surely be raised up, then shall you be told of all that you did.  And that is easy for Allah."

The Mutual Loss and Gain 64:7
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Yes by my Lord, you shall surely be raised up, then shall you be told of all that you did.  And that is easy for Allah.

Letter to Erin 20150821

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

All this talk about purity versus corruption brings me to housecleaning.  I look up at all the cobwebs on the ceiling, and my hearts groans: housecleaning.  I look down and see all the debris stuck at the sole of my foot, and my heart sinks: housecleaning.  I hate housecleaning.  I like a clean house, but I hate housecleaning.  Is that hypocritical?  No, I'm lazy.  I would rather be doing something else.  Prophet Muhammad (peace be on him) was always serious about keeping clean.  I don't know how much housecleaning he actually did, but he was very serious about cleanliness.  I try to keep clean, but I am a lazy slob.  I clean my bedroom/office and house went it becomes unbearable, but I hate housecleaning.  Now when you get your house inshaAllah, it is YOUR house.  I'll help a little bit, but if the house isn't clean it won't be my fault, because it's YOUR house.  I would still have my little house/office to keep inshaAllah, but your house, and everything in it, is all yours.

I was working on your house plan again today.  It takes me a long time, but I have the actual house finished.  Now it's time to furnish it and do the yard.  I told you before that the living room is bi-level with a high ceiling.  There are 6 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, 2 kitchens, a small gym, and a library/study.  It sounds like a big house, but it isn't.  There is a lot of jinn activity in the old house which was once my grandfather's house, where your house will be built inshaAllah.  You're going to have to get used to a life with active jinns, which is compounded by all the ghosts that follow me around.  This can't be undone, but is a situation of our marriage.  Jinns are just like people in that not everybody is evil, and they have to face Judgement Day too.  Interesting yeah, but perhaps nothing at all will happen.  I will teach you the verses of the Qur'an that protect against jinns.  InshaAllah.

Well it's almost time to pray the night prayer.  I want you to take good care of your precious self, and maintain your prayers.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150820

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Just because corruption is inevitable in this life, it doesn't mean we have to consume it.  So I happened to buy flour with bugs in it doesn't mean I have to eat the bugs.  I'm going to pick them off the bread, one by one if I have to.  Now the people who make a profit off corruption would probably give themselves and rationalize that corruption is natural and inevitable.  Yeah there are shit eaters out there, but I don't want to be like them.  So I try to be pure, as best as I can.  With flaws and mistakes, may Allah forgive me.  God is all that is good and pure, so why is there corruption?  Because it's all good if we can purify ourselves, and score enough points with God to get into the perfection of heaven.  InshaAllah.  Without making insulting remarks like, "God if you exist, then grant me this."

Well, the potatoes I bought don't have any bugs.  And the steak is perfect.  Would you fancy some steak and potatoes to go with the bread?  Oops, I already ate it all.  Your portion too.  But you're welcome for dinner anytime.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150819

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  Are you OK?  I care about you, you know that.  It's ghastly hot right now.  Yesterday morning was shiveringly cold, because it rained all night the night before.  That's how it's been around here lately, from one extreme to the other.

It's been a wormy kind of day for me.  I bought some fresh bags of flour, and they have bugs in them.  And their larvae.  I couldn't just waste all that flour, so I had to pick those out of the dough one by one.  The bugs have also figured out how to get into fresh bags of rice, so I keep my rice in the cooler so they don't become a problem.  But my rice cooker blew up this morning.  Well, the power cord shorted.  Then the worms came back to bug my cats.  It's because I keep feeding them the same cat food.  It can't be helped, because I have so much of it.  I buy 20 kilos at a time!  So I had to re-administer the worm syrup.  Bat Cat III does not like worm syrup.  He thinks he's so smart.  I had to wrap him up in a towel so as not to get clawed to death.  I guess the lesson is that there is corruption in everything in this world.

I pray you are getting plenty of rest, and are not overworking.  I wish for the best for you, because I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150818

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

My source tells me that people WILL overwork you.  To death.  Under the sun.  In front of the camera.  This is no longer a possibility, but imminent.  Legal contracts will not protect you, but only compensate for losses.  And that is how you should regard them.

Don't be alarmed, Erin.  Just be brave.  And lazy.  Stay indoors.  Work indoors.  Watch TV.  Practice your cooking.  Play video games.  Exercise indoors.  I wish I were there to help protect you, but Allah is the Best to protect.  So please pray, and be proactive in your awareness of how precious you are, and how precious you are to me.  Erin, I love you and I need you.  Ya Allah, please protect my Erin.

Letter to Erin 20150817

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi there, my most beautiful sweetheart Erin.  How are you feeling today, my love?  I pray you are feeling healthy and confident.  There's nothing all that out of the normal going on here today.  Right now I'm watching "Monsterquest- Birdzilla" on TV, while waiting for dinner to cook.  Dinner isn't all that special either.  Just chicken cooked in mole sauce, served with white rice.  It's been raining, so I didn't do any yard work.  So I guess I'll follow my laziness for the rest of the day, lay out my bed early, and take it easy.  It's been a busy morning, so I am tired.  Yeah, I'm tired.  I pray you are taking sweet care of your precious self.  I love you, and I need you.

Qur'an 20150817

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

7.  But never will they express their desire for death because of what their hands have sent on before them!  And Allah knows well those who do wrong!

8.  Say, "The death from which you flee will truly overtake you, then will you be sent back to the Knower of things secret and open, and God will tell you the things that you did!"

9.  O you who believe!  When the call is proclaimed to prayer on Friday, hasten earnestly to rememberance of Allah, and leave off business.  That is best for you, if you only knew.

10.  And when the prayer is finished, then may you disperse through the land and seek of the bounty of Allah, and celebrate the praises of Allah often, that you may prosper.

11.  But when they see some bargain or some amusement, they disperse headlong to it, and leave you standing.  Say, "That from the Presence of Allah is better than any amusement or bargain!  And Allah is the Best to provide."

Friday 62:7-11
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The death from which you flee will truly overtake you, then will you be sent back to the Knower of things secret and open, and God will tell you the things that you did! 

That from the Presence of Allah is better than any amusement or bargain!  And Allah is the Best to provide.

Letter to Erin 20150816

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin, my love!  How are you feeling?  Are you trying to slow down, and make the world conform to your schedule?  Don't forget my beloved, that the goal of our marriage is to slow down, stay put, and raise a family.  I want to love you and take care of you.  I love you, and I need you.

I'm watching "John Belushi- the final 24 hours" right now.  This is a famous drug story.  I remember reading this story when I was 15 years old.  I was totally clueless and still in high school.  This is almost like a work story.  Where your work is being a 24 hour party.  Who else was like that?  It's not just using drugs to enhance work.  It's the business of having fun.

Qur'an 20150816

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

5.  The similitude of those who were charged with the Mosaic Law but who subsequently failed is that of a donkey which carries huge tomes.  Evil is the similitude of people who falsify the Signs of Allah.  And Allah guides not people who do wrong.

6.  Say, "O you who stand on Judaism!  If you think that you are friends to Allah to the exclusion of humans, then express your desire for death, if you are truthful!"

Friday 62:5-6
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O you who stand on Judaism!  If you think that you are friends to Allah to the exclusion of humans, then express your desire for death, if you are truthful!

Letter to Erin 20150815

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

**sniffle**  I suddenly got the sniffles again.  I was just waiting to head out to the mosque for Friday prayer, then the sneezes got a hold on me.  I didn't bring any tissues with me, so all the while I was at the mosque, I had to swallow the damned stuff.  Ugh!  This is certainly a conspiracy by the Flu Virus Collective!  And after the prayer, I had to go straight into voice training.  So I was sneezing and sniffling while I was singing.  After that I finally found the time to drain my sinus cavity, so inshaAllah the flu won't get a grip on me.  **sniffle**

So I was not in the mood at all to do any cooking for dinner.  I had already made the decision not to spend any money today.  I had some leftover steak in the cooler, and a can of beans.  I didn't even bother to heat anything up.  I stuck a spoon into the can of beans, sliced up the steak, and ate it with raw onion and Thai peppers from my garden.  Tasted quite good, actually.  Want some?

I pray that you are eating properly and getting plenty of rest.  You are MY girl, Erin.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150814

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello there, my darling Erin.  How are you feeling, Sweetie?  I just had my dinner.  I ate out for dinner, just a plain old rice dish at the corner restaurant.  Right now, I'm watching a 2 and a half hour evaluation on Zildjian ride cymbals.  Hey, I'm VERY fussy about my cymbals.  I wouldn't ever have more than 3 cymbals on my kit including the hi-hat.  I don't think you would ever sit through these cymbal evaluation videos like me.  And to tell you the truth, it puts me to sleep.  But I can watch it over and over and over again and again and again.  Because I'm VERY fussy about my cymbals.


A while ago, I thought that I would sing "Heaven Or Las Vegas" by the Cocteau Twins.  But I just couldn't understand what the hell she was saying, and when I Googled for the lyrics, the people who posted the lyrics didn't seem to understand what the hell she was saying either.  So I gave up on that.  Then I thought maybe "Lorelei" would be easier to sing, and it's such a beautiful song.  But again when I Googled the lyrics, the words don't sound like anything like what she sounds like she's saying.  I can't get an honest emotional interpretation of the words if I can't understand what the words are.  The only option to emotionally connecting to the words is to precisely copy Elizabeth Fraser.  And that's a second best effort at best, because when you copy somebody you will never be as good as who you copy.  Gah!  I hate singers.  Divas, all of them.

I didn't mean to bore you with work chat.  I pray that you are not overworking, and taking it easy and patiently.  You are the most beautiful girl in the world to me, because you are MY girl.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150813

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How are you feeling today, my darling?  You are the most beautiful girl to me, because you are MY girl.  All those other girls look like men to me.  So please don't be blue, because I love you, and I need you.

It's just another everyday day here for me.  I finally got the old weed whacker going again after nearly 2 weeks.  It turned out that all it needed was a new spark plug.  I managed to get my front yard trimmed nice and neat.  I was about to do the side of the road, when it started raining again.  So I went inside, took a shower and made my dinner.  Fried calamari!  Just the rings today, so my dinner looked very civilized.  Tasted awesome too, alhamdulillah.  I'm sorry, but I ate it all.

I was just working on your house plan.  It's not a super big house, but it seems like a mansion to me.  I just can't draw, even with CAD.  At the main entrance there's a high ceiling over a bi level living area.  The windows there are showroom sized on the second floor only, overlooking the garden but not the street.  The bedrooms are secluded and out of sight.  Right now, I'm putting in the doors and the lights.  I don't have many options for lighting in Sims 3, but in real life everything will be LED.  I want to use as many LED spotlights with motion detectors as possible.  I work for the Cause of Allah, and as my wife it would be a different kind of reality to which you are used to, but this house is a reality I am creating for you inshaAllah.  So please give yourself to Allah in all you that do, and Allah will grant us a home in heaven and victory in this life inshaAllah.

Letter to Erin 20150812

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello Sweetie!  How are you feeling today?  It's just another everyday day for me.  I slept in this morning after the dawn prayer, and woke up at 10 am.  Yawn.  I'm still drowsy, and still as lazy as ever.  But I had to get my ass in gear and get the grass cutter to be serviced.  While I was waiting, I had brunch at the Tuesday market.  Nothing special, just rice.  I bought a pair of pants.  Little ------- is still in heat, and she keeps demanding my attention.  Or she would stick her claws in my butt.  It's been raining every day, and the sand I use for the kitty litter is all wet.  Sand is recyclable, it just needs time to bleach under the sun.  But since it's been raining all the time, the sand doesn't make good kitty litter.  So while I was bending over filling up drainage pots with sand, Bat Cat III jumped on my butt and stuck his claws into me.  He probably thought it was a joke, and was trying to get some attention.  But I seem to be the butt of cat jokes lately.  Dinner was pepper steak on rice.  Super hot and spicy!  I still have some rice left, if you want some.  Erin, you beautiful girl.  You're MY girl.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150811

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How are you feeling, my love?  Dinner at eight?  Well, I don't have any friends to invite over, but dinner tonight is spaghetti in clam broth.  Yeah!  I had all this clam broth and clam meat left over, and I had to use it all up.  So the concept was simple: I fried up a handful of basil leaves with garlic, then dumped in all the clam broth, then cooked it all down until there was just enough sauce to cover the spaghetti.  I thought about a thickening agent like corn starch, but decided against it.  I sprinkled the clam meat over the al dente pasta in a large bowl, then poured all the sauce over it.  Simple, huh?  Tasted good, but I'm stuffed.  I had to eat your portion.  I was so full, I could hardly pray.  Join me for dinner next time, OK?  I love you, and I need you.  Now if you would please excuse me, I need to play more "Cat Goes Fishing."

Letter to Erin 20150810

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Just as a reminder, Allah forbids that you be friends with 3 types of people:
1.  People who fight you because of your Islam
2.  People who force you out of your home
3.  People who help the people who force you out of your home. 
I wish I were with you to help protect you, but Allah is the Best to protect, so please put your trust in Allah.  I love you, and I need you.

In business, it is a standard practice to use something until it is used up.  Elvis is a good example: he was used up.  So don't allow yourself to be used up.  Where is the happiness in that?  Relax.  Take it easy.   Practice cooking or something.  Play video games.  Right now, I'm hooked on "Cat Goes Fishing".  I'm getting good at catching sharks!

------- is the one in heat right now.  She's not a howler and wriggler like ----, neither is she subtle and relaxed like mama cat Floofy.  Instead she likes to amp up the naughtiness.  Her favorite hobby when she's in heat is to point her pee at any amount of moisture that happens to be on the floor.  Her main target is my bathroom door.  She also asks for my attention, to pick her up and cuddle her.  If I ignore her, then she won't hesitate to stick a claw in my butt or something.  Aggressive female.

Letter to Erin 20150809

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello there, my beloved Erin.  How are you feeling today?  Ya Allah, please protect my Erin, and give her good health.  I am writing this letter today kind of late.  It's because I woke up at 5:30 this morning.  I usually wake at about that time anyway, but this morning right after the dawn prayer I went to the main market downtown.  I hardly go downtown anymore, I try to make do with what I have at the kampung.  There was nothing all that special downtown.  The good stuff gets sold out quickly, even at 7 am.  So I find value with what people overlook.  I bought won tons, tofu, fish balls, and 2 kilos of lala.  You remember lala, right?  Those dime sized clams.  Yeah, they're tiny and tedious, but they generate more meat and broth than 2 kilos of larger clams.  Density.  So the first thing I did when I got home was to separate the meat from the broth, which is my normal procedure with clams.  By the time I got done shucking all those clams, it was 10:30 am.  I was too drowsy to continue cooking, so I took a shower and a nap.  I woke again at noon, made my coffee and tea, and had a small steak for lunch.  Just a steak the size of a candy bar, and nothing else.  Beef goes a long way.  But dinner was stuffed won tons with clams, tofu, garlic, and kaffir lime leaves.  Alhamdulillah!  I gave some to my Mom, and ate the rest.  Then after the sunset prayer, I had to take another nap.

I want you to take good, loving care of yourself in my absence.  You are my Queen, and you mean the world to me.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150808

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Sweetie!  Hi there, beautiful girl!  How are you feeling right now?  I'm feeling extra lazier than usual.  It's been raining non stop, and the temperature is nice and cold.  I like it cold.  Mostly because this body sweats easily, and I don't like sweating.  Less discomfort, less irritating, and less laundry.  In fact, I'm in the mood for a nice hot chocolate.  I haven't had one of those in years!  Strangely enough, I have a lot of hot chocolate mix, about a kilo.  But I haven't had the craving until now, that it's nice and cold.  The common brand around here is actually a malted chocolate mix.  After I finish this letter, I'm going to set up my bed and play "Cat Goes Fishing".  All those small fish are so annoying!  But I finally earned enough to buy the Master Rod. 

You're a sweet girl Erin, but you should have by now know that you can't be friends with everyone.  Especially with the elevated position that Allah has bestowed on you.  So treat our enemies as enemies, specifically those who oppose you for your Islam.  I pray you are getting plenty of rest, eating properly, and maintaining your prayers.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150807

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi there, o beautiful, sensitive soul.  How are you feeling today?  Not too serious, I hope?  I pray you are feeling healthy and confident.  I just finished eating dinner, and doing a mountain of dishes.  Today was a good day for cooking, alhamdulillah.  Everything turned out perfect.  I ate a lot, though.  Wish you were here.  I love you, and I need you.

I'll be the first to admit that I'm reclusive.  I do not enjoy the company of lots of people, and I have never enjoyed the company of lots of people.  Prophet Muhammad (peace be on him) was gregarious, and Islam is a social religion.  But I am not a prophet.  I am not a spiritual leader.  I am a musician.  If the people need a role model, they should look at the Prophet (peace be on him).  I am not a leader, I am a follower: a follower of Prophet Muhammad (peace be on him).  I don't want to be worshiped, and I don't want to start a cult.  Prophet Abraham (peace be on him) had to work alone.  Do the learned today consider his work Islam, do they consider him a Muslim?  He had to work his mission alone in a society of pagans.  Would the learned today have the nerve to spread Islam alone and peacefully in a society of unbelievers?  It's understandable that they would be afraid.  I put my fear in Allah.  I once had a taste of spreading Islam alone and peacefully in a society of unbelievers, being a lone musician in an American underground music scene.  I glorified Allah with music in a society of atheists and devil worshipers.  Ya Allah!  I'm so grateful that You are the One Who accepts worship, not the petty humans who would throw me into the fire for any flaw.  You are the One Who is Most Gracious and Most Merciful, please forgive me for my reclusiveness and other flaws, and accept my work as worship.

I'm not waiting for something that never arrives.  I'm waiting for Judgement Day.  I'm not a Man of the World.  I'm a Man of the Afterlife.

Letter to Erin 20150806

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I suppose since I have 3 female cats permanently kept in the house, the odds are that someone is going to be in heat at any time.  Right now, mama cat Floofy and little ---- are in heat.  Floofy is very subtle in her heat, just one or two extra meows than usual, usually when I'm not around.  After all, she's already had her kittens, so there's no sense of urgency or whatever.  ---- is much more passionate.  Of course I have to pet her and show her some attention, but when I have to do something else, she hangs on to my pant leg with her claws, so I'm dragging her around everywhere.  But I love my kitties, so I don't mind.  I just pray they aren't suffering while in heat.

Ah!  I found a pack of spaghetti in my drawer.  i remember I had bought spaghetti some months ago, but I had lost it, but today it suddenly popped out.  I had a little pasta sauce left, and a little sausage left.  So I fried up some garlic with the sausage, dumped in all the sauce, and added water.  When it dried up a little, I added the al dente pasta, and mixed it up.  I shut off the heat, poured on a cup of chopped basil, a sprinkle of coriander seed , and some cheese on top, put a cover on, then took a shower and prayed the sunset prayer.  I just finished eating dinner before writing this letter.  It was a huge helping, and I could have split it with you, but I ate it all.  Tasted awesome.  Alhamdulillah.

Next I believe I have some encoding to do.  I hope you are getting plenty of rest, eating properly, and maintaining your prayers.  I love you, and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20150805

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin, it's me again, your dog.  Yeah, I'm your black dog.  I have to warn you though, people don't like Zam the puppy dog.  Most people prefer Zam the unpredictable and dangerous.  They don't like me when I'm nice.  Which is a shame, because I hate being a hard ass.  Thus I isolate myself.

I'll have to admit that I get a kick from seeing your being a serious business woman.  I take it that video is from the last Super Bowl?  You were probably just weary from having to work all day.  You know, I remember the 1985 Super Bowl.  Isn't that the one where Walter Payton was about to retire, and he just had to score one more touchdown before he called it quits?  And there was a guy nicknamed the "Refrigerator"?  And the star linebacker was Lawrence Taylor?  Why do I remember all this?  I was still in college, and those were some of the loneliest days of my life.  In high school I was loathed, but in college I was just lost.  So I thought keeping up with football would help cure that lost feeling.  I also watched basketball those days!  What a trip, huh?  Utah Jazz!  John Stockton and the Mailman!  Oh dear, I'm beginning to feel embarrassed.  You go ahead and be the sports pro of the family, and I'll be your biggest fan.  Your dog, rather.  Because I love you, and I need you.

Once we are married and settled down inshaAllah, the sports feed is not going to be all that great for you.  People here like football where you use you kick the ball with your feet, not the football you carry with your hands.  Now is the time to establish the connections to get a reliable sports feed from America to Malaysia.  This could mean big bucks if it catches on, for as yet American sports don't go in Asia except perhaps baseball in Japan.  We're not going to have much privacy anyway, so you might as well get paid to endorse the sports biz.  Just don't forget, after we're married, NO MORE TRAVEL.  Make them travel.

Letter to Erin 20150804

 In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

It's Monday evening.  Mama cat Floofy and ---- are in heat right now.  I need to be as candid as possible about an issue which is a topic of hot contention on both sides of the world.  I usually don't care much about what people babble about, but this is a legal issue which involves my wife.  It's the "3 wives" issue.

I will say right now that I like pretty blondes.  Call it chauvinistic or weakness or whatever, but I prefer blondes.  If I don't marry a blonde, I probably won't marry at all, but there has to be a good Muslim blonde out there somewhere.  So when 3 pretty blonde wives are presented to me, it is most certainly a temptation.  I'll have to submit that it is also an ingenious global marketing plan worth billions of dollars, but people seem to forget an important detail: at this moment I can't even afford one wife, let alone three.  Plus I am an old man, and have used up most of my libido.  The Islamic community wants me to give each wife her own house.  Besides the mountainous cost of that, logistics demand that I would aggressively have to protect my wives, and I wouldn't care much about what the people think of my actions in that matter.

My decision is to focus on Erin and her happiness right now.  The best time for her career is right before she marries, and when she is done with her career, I will make sure that she is securely happy and settled inshaAllah.  By then, if I am able to marry more and Erin grants her permission, then inshaAllah it will be so.  A message to my wife: I am concerned about your Islam.  I hate fake friends, and I certainly don't want a fake wife.  You don't have to be an extremist, just do the best you can with the situation that Allah has given you.  Erin, I love you, and I need you.
 
I've posted 2 photos of papaya trees that grow in my garden.  Papaya trees grow as male and female trees.  The male tree is the one with the white flowers, and the female tree is the one with the 3 heads, each bearing fruit.  No, papaya trees don't usually have 3 heads.  In the background is my parents' house, and the vine growing on the female tree is called "sirih", which my maternal grandmother was fond of chewing like gum.

Letter to Erin 20150803

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Yay!  My first eggplant and tomatoes are ready for harvest!  Alhamdulillah!  I grew those big, round type of eggplants, and I picked the first one today for dinner.  And dinner tonight is eggplant and potato hash, with ground beef, garlic, onions, Thai peppers, cilantro seed, and salt and pepper.  To be served with 2 nice and soft tortillas, one for you, and one for me.  OK, I'll eat them both since you're not here.  I grew the Thai peppers in my garden, too.  I also have chives, mint, cilantro, and basil.  Hmm, I should have put some of that in the hash.  My first tomatoes are sooooo pretty.  Nice and cute and red and ripe.  You know how tomatoes grow in bunches like grapes, and my first bunch of tomatoes was a bunch of three.  But one of them is still green.  Why is that?  What does it mean??!!

I guess I need to take the old weed whacker in for service.  You know, I don't really like all this physical labor.  But if I don't cut the grass then nobody would do it, and it would make me irresponsible, especially when your house inshaAllah is concerned.  I would rather lie around all day and play video games.  If I were pretty, I would rather shave my legs.  But I'm not pretty, and I'm the only one tending the yard, so I have to cut the grass.

Are you feeling blue again, my dearest Erin?  Please be optimistic, and pray.  OK?  Realists try to propound a very harsh and cynical world, but if you want to create a reality, then you would want to create a great one, right?  So please be optimistic, and pray.  Please know that I love you, and I need you.  It's time for the sunset prayer now, and after that I'm going to enjoy some eggplant and potato hash.  Would you like to join me for dinner?

Letter to Erin 20150802

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello Erin, my love!  How are you feeling today?  Well, I miss you too.  I wish we were together.  InshaAllah, we will.  Can't rush God, you know.  Plus there are still many things for you and I to do, and a house to build.  So please be patient and pray.  I love you, and I need you.

I'm not all that particularly busy today.  Of course I had stuff to do, but for some reason I don't feel busy.  I went downtown this morning to get gasoline, and deal with my cell phone account.  I don't use my cell phone much for talking.  It has Internet but only 3G, and I have to travel to find a WiFi hotspot.  I use my phone mostly to play games, watch movies, and read pdf files.  Skype is out of the question, but my phone Internet crawls.  It's going to take money to update my console system for Skype, plus I need to have a ring ready for pickup.

I didn't do any cooking today either.  I had flat bread with curry for lunch at one of the restaurants I frequently patronize, and my Dad bought me shrimp croquettes with fried tofu and cucumbers with peanut sauce for dinner.  You're welcome to share my food anyway.  I was in the middle of cutting grass when my Dad gave me the food.  So I put the food in my motorcycle basket, then continued to cut grass.  I had planned to cut all the grass by the side of the road.  But I was only able to cut the grass at the side of the road by your house inshaAllah, when my weed whacker cut out and I couldn't get it started again.  What does it mean??!!!