Letter to Erin 20160501

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello, my precious darling!  How's it going today?  Are you feeling pleased with yourself?  Well I think you did great, and that near riot you caused proves that you are MY Rock and Roll Babe.  You should have dome some shopping while you were in LA before you headed south.  What's up with this mystery itinerary, anyway?  I find it hard to accept that it's entirely your doing: there's no way you could have infiltrated the LA underground by yourself.  Whatever you do, please be careful OK?  When life becomes surreal, always trust your heart and your dreams, and don't do anything you don't want to do.  Please pray.  Ya Allah, please protect my Erin and Antonia.  And have tons of fun!  You are MY girl, and you are the most beautiful girl in the world.  I love you and I need you.

Lunch was rather successful today.  It was more of a brunch, because I had some errands to run before the afternoon prayer.  I had some leftover rice from last night's sushi, so I made fried rice with crispy sole.  I wanted to make breaded shrimp for dinner.  Sounds normal, huh?  But I didn't have enough breadcrumbs, so I had to mix what I had with flour, and the shrimp didn't have the right appearance.  Plus, there wasn't enough of it.  I needed 3 times that amount for my voracious appetite.  I guess it's my turn to eat like a supermodel.  I would offer you some, but I ate it all.  Oh no, I forgot to make ranch!

Letter to Erin 20160430

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

It's raining right now!  Alhamdulillah.  So did you have lots of fun with the LA underground?  How on earth did you get that connection?  It must have been a thrill for you to be an outlaw, when those rent-a-cops shone their flashlights at you, and you fled for your life.  You're so cute, Erin!  No please don't get mad at me, please stay a good girl!  I need you to be safe and protected, if anything happened to you I would be absolutely mortified!  I love you so much.  And I need you.

Tonight is sushi night.  I filleted all that sole yesterday, and I went and got some seaweed sheets this morning, so I'm set to make some sushi.  A few setbacks though: I had a leftover seaweed sheet from a year ago and I couldn't waste that, I used Basmati rice which isn't sticky so there were rice grains spilling all over the place, and I don't have wasabi so I used mustard powder instead.  I used sole, egg, and chives to stuff my rolls.  I should have fried up the skins and fins, but I forgot.  I don't use one of those bamboo roller thingies, I just use my hands.  I left the chives long so they would tickle your nose, and the arrangement looks somewhat like a skyscraper landscape.  Want some?

Letter to Erin 20160429

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

The purpose of our marriage is to stay put  and raise a family.  That means no travel.  It's awesome that the world is your oyster right now, and you're busy and successful, but please make a plan to suspend travel after you marry me inshaAllah so you can devote your time to being a mother to your children, and raise them to be good people.  You can still conduct business, but they will have to come to you.  Please make this arrangement!  I love you and I need you.

That being said, congratulations on your new ventures, and you have my support.  Please please please be careful when you go politicking, especially in LA, I don't want you to get hooked or harmed!  Before you register your charity, consider that some people might mistake it for the TransGender Foundation.  Especially if you wear those upside down triangle earrings.  Using your full name is more dignified, don't you agree?  And keep those books straight!  The problem with lack of privacy is that sometimes people know exactly how much change you have in your pocket.

I bought some sole at the market this morning.  You know, flatfish.  It takes some experience to find fish that tastes great for sushi, and sole is awesomely sweet.  The top fillet is soft while the bottom fillet is chewy.  I like to use both in sushi.  Processing sole is tedious, and I spent the evening doing that.  I had to scale and gut it, and it has a LOT of scales for such a small fish.  The skin can be peeled off, and I keep the skin and the fins because they crisp up nicely.  I think it's sushi for dinner tomorrow!  I hope the Chinese grocery store has seaweed sheets.

But dinner tonight was rice.  Most people here eat steamed rice everyday, with a variety of side dishes.  This is known locally as "nasi lauk campur" or "nasi campur".  I prefer steamed rice with only one side dish.  So tonight's dinner was sliced tenderloin with red peppers, onions, and tofu stir fried in light soy sauce and black pepper, to be eaten with steamed rice.  Alhamdulillah.  I'm so full.

Letter to Erin 20160428

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello beautiful Erin.  Hello beautiful Antonia.  How are those emotions today?  I want you to rejoice, because the world is in the palms of your hands, and you didn't have to do too much for it either, and you didn't have to sell your souls.  So why should you care about what the hypocrites have to say?  They are not your friends, and they won't be your friends even if you please them.  While the world is going bonkers over you two, of course I rejoice as well for I am so grateful, but I'm 50 and I've used up most of my libido.  I'm going to have to do drugs to keep up with you.  Sex, Viagra and Rock and Roll.  Rejoice in the world in rememberance of the afterlife, because it is a much better place for the righteous.  No more heartbreak, no more resentment, no more imperfection, no growing old.  Please be good people and pray, because the afterlife is a much better place.

What is home?  It's your house, of course.  I give my life to Allah to build it for you, inshaAllah.  At the gate is an old amra tree, about 50 years old.  It bears so much fruit, and is full of young fruit right now.  The fruit tastes like a slightly sour pear when young, and tastes like a kiwi/peach when fully ripe.  I don't eat much of it, so the neighbors partake of the fruit, which is great for dipping and pickles.  8 years ago, my Mom and I went looking for amra seedlings, and I have one from then which I turned into a bonsai, which I parked in front of my little house.

Are you still being a politician in LA?  I'm sorry if you don't feel comfortable being so immersed in food business without your knowledge, but you had better be ready for it because it's going to happen anyway.  There's not much to it, my beloved.  Just eat what you like to eat and don't eat what you don't like to eat.  You can learn how to cook if you want, it just takes practice.  It's part of success to be a market bender, so rejoice in the world, but remember that the afterlife is a better place.  I love you and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20160427

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

What is home?  For women and children, it is easy for you to return home to your mother.  But I am a 50 year old man.  For me to say that I want to go home to my Mommy is simply freakish.  It just doesn't sound right.  Now don't get me wrong, I love my mother with all my heart but a man needs a place to call his own, a family to call his own.  You are my family, and I am your home inshaAllah.  I love you and I need you.  Ya Allah, please help me.

This morning I went to pay my power bill.  At the same time, I stopped by the Tuesday market down the road and picked up a kilo of shrimp.  Big shrimp, good price.  I think they're farmed shrimp.  I also went downtown to the main market, and got more tofu and won ton skins.  So lunch was obviously fried won tons stuffed with shrimp.  It was a late lunch, because I spent a lot of time processing shrimp.  I had to cut off the moustaches, separate to heads from the bodies, then shell the shrimp for the won tons.  I love shrimp heads, they're great for flavor and for stuffing.  But don't stuff won tons with them!  Stuffed won tons should be light in flavor, so you can't use beef or chicken.  Seafood white meat only, clam meat is OK.  I made 43 won tons.  No, I didn't eat them all in one sitting.  I saved a few for my dinner, which was a block of tofu swimming in thick curry, with won tons.

In the evening, I trimmed the scrub over at your house inshaAllah.  The army ants attacked my balls again, so I had to douse them with pesticide again.  Then I dug up a tapioca for my Mom.  It was HUGE!  I love you, Mom!

Letter to Erin 20160426

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I've mentioned this before, that as my wife you are automatically an endorser of food products.  You might as well take advantage of this privilege, and enjoy the tastes of the world, have dinner parties, eat with your friends at good restaurants, and spend lots of time at the supermarket.  Why, you can even get your agent to arrange endorsements.  It doesn't matter if you know how to cook or not.  Just eat what you like, and don't eat what you don't like.  Of course, if you learn how to cook you will have more power.  And of course, no one wants you to get bloated, least of all me, but I'm sure you know your limit.  You're a professional, right?  Just keep it halal, please.

For example, you know how much I like buffalo wings.  That's hot chicken wings, folks.  A throwback from the pizza days.  I used to eat suicide wings!  Nowadays I got my home made hot sauce which is milder than suicide wings but just as tasty, and at one point I was eating chicken wings every week, a kilo at a time.  Yeah, man-sized portions.  Then suddenly, nobody would sell me chicken wings.  "I don't have chicken wings."  "Those wings come with the chicken."  "I don't have enough to give you."  All sorts of excuses.  But tonight at the night market, blessings rained upon me.  After one guy refused to sell me chicken wings, 5 minutes later another stall popped out of nowhere stacked chest high with chicken, and the guy said "Yeah, I'll sell you chicken wings."  Yeah!  Looks like hot wings this week, Gorgeous Babes!

I bought some chicken rice at the night market for dinner.  Lunch was an eggplant and cheese omelet with hash browns.  Looks like diner food, huh?  I should have left the ketchup in the photo.  Come on over for chicken wings, Babe!  Gorgeous!  I love you and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20160425

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Antonia, I'm afraid I cannot offer you a proposal with dowry until I have married Erin, and she has settled down in her new house, and if I can afford it, gives me written permission to have a second wife.  Until then, the best I can offer you is an endorsement as a potential second wife.  InshaAllah it would be very helpful to your career, because after all the endorsement of an athlete does not generate much or any revenue for a modeling or acting career.  My source tells me that you are in an oppressive relationship.  Has he hit you?  I can take you as a wife, but like I said Erin has priority.  What you need to do is to stop carrying trash with you wherever you go.  Dump it.

I'm the last to get paid.  I have yet to get paid.  I remember working in a restaurant, my job was to make sure the dough was the same every time, among other things.  The money I received from cooking I put into the music, to generate music, to keep the music alive.  Nowadays it's the music that's making money, but I haven't received any of it yet.  Yes I know I must be patient, and I am grateful that Allah chose me to bear this music.  I don't want your hard earned money.  It is my responsibility to finance our marriage, so I ask you to please love me and be patient with me until Allah grants me the means to pay for our marriage.

I don't know what happiness is.  Allah has provided me by inspiration this direction, that perhaps I may find happiness in marriage.  I love you and I need you.

Please make a donation of a minimum of one US dollar or one Euro to a worthwhile charity.

Qur'an 20160425

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

77.  Haven't you turned your vision to those who were told to restrain their hands, but establish regular prayers and spend in regular charity?When the order for fighting was issued to them, behold!  A section of them feared humans as, or even more than, they should have feared Allah.  They said, "Our Lord!  Why have You ordered us to fight?  Would You not grant us respite to our term, soon?"  Say, "Short is the enjoyment of this world.  The hereafter is the best for those who do right: never will you be dealt with unjustly in the very least!"

78.  Wherever you are, death will find you out, even if you are in towers built up strong and high!  If some good befalls them, they say, "This is from Allah."  But if evil, they say, "This is from you."  Say, "All things are from Allah."  But what has come to these people that they fail to understand a single fact?

(The Women 4:77-78)
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Letter to Erin 20160424

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

I'm grateful for your body too, Sweetie.  I will more grateful when you are with me inshaAllah, and I get to inspect your body closely.  You are beautiful.  Please don't lose your sweetness, now that you're becoming wiser and metropolitan.  Ya Allah, please protect my family and keep us strong and healthy.  Did you enjoy that bubble bath, by the way?  You looked angry to me.  People don't normally soak for a long time in hot baths here in the tropics.  Fungus.

Nothing out of the ordinary going on here.  Well it rained today, which is a big deal when there's been a drought.  I made a tofu and cheese omelet with the clam broth from yesterday.  It tasted great, but it wasn't photogenic so I don't have a picture to show you.  I got impatient and folded it over too soon.  Right now, I'm watching "How jet engines work" on TV.  Now that you both are globetrotting, please be safe and don't take unnecessary risks, OK?  I love you and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20160423

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Beautiful!  I'm writing this letter later than usual.  I had a late dinner, then I went to join the congregation for the night prayer. then as I was getting settled to write this letter, the cats chased a mouse into my bedroom and it hid behind my very heavy chest of drawers.  At first I tried to get it out with a long flat piece of metal.  I got to squeak a few times, but it didn't budge.  So I resorted to brute force and slammed the chest of drawers into the wall, then moved it outwards and found the mouse as flat as a pancake in the corner.  I guess death was instantaneous.

Now that I'm soaked in sweat, how are you my love?  My beloved wife inshaAllah?  Are you feeling absolutely great?  Since you're traveling around, I believe it's safe to assume that mashaAllah, people know that you're my girl.  I guess it wouldn't be so bad in London and if your bosses could afford an armed guard it would be OK, but if you're in the Middle East then I don't want you to go wandering around.  But please do try to have fun when you visit the Land of Make Believe.  Please keep safe, because I love you and I need you.  I haven't been in England since I was a small kid, but I do remember more now.  For some reason I remember my street address (114 Ifield Road, London SW10), I remember fireworks on Guy Fawkes day, I remember having an Irish friend named Rifle.  Yeah.  I remember making toy guns with Lego bricks.  I remember Black Jacks and Rowntree's Fruit Gums.  I remember going to Manchester and finding an Airfix shop.  I remember shopping in London with my Mom, then getting lost and miraculously finding my mother again.  I guess kids can remember a lot of things.

Yes ma'am, I won't let them in inshaAllah.  But did you want me to wear a muscle tee?  I thought you hated muscle tees.  My Dad bought me some clams this morning.  This type was "Snails of a Thousand Brains".  He said that they were bottom of the barrel, but there were still some good ones in there.  With clams, I always separate the meat from the broth immediately.  I used the meat to stuff won tons for dinner.  I didn't get much broth though.  Maybe I'll use that for my omelet tomorrow.  For lunch I had a block of tofu with my Mom's beef soup.  Hungry?

Letter to Erin 20160422

  In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Let me tell you a couple of things I know about Jesus Christ (peace be on him).  I've talked about this before.  Jesus Christ (peace be on him) was sent to the Jews as prophet Muhammad (peace be on him) was sent to the Arabs.  The purpose of the return of Jesus Christ (peace be on him) is to kill the Antichrist (in Arabic known as the "Dajjal").  All this action will take place in the Middle East.  Can any one of you brainy beauties guess which city did prophet Muhammad (peace be on him) say that Jesus Christ (peace be on him) will make his return?

Malaysia achieved its independence from Britain in 1957.  When I was small, I lived in London for a couple of years.  My Dad got his law degree in London, and he took the whole family along.  I don't remember much because I was small, except Cilla Black, the Carpenters, and waiting for my Dad to stop by and say hello on his way to classes while I was cooped up in a nursery school.  Cilla gave me an idea a few years ago about doing a regular concert/talk show for TV syndication.  Sounds profitable, but who's going to produce it?  My primary concern is to please Allah with music.

Yesterday evening I was cutting the grass by the roadside, and I just finished the length of your house inshaAllah when my trusty old weed whacker died.  Well, I guess if it died then it's not so trusty.  I took it to the mechanic this morning, and I was able to finish what I started just now.  I took a photo of how dry the rice fields are.  While I was taking the photo, a crow was watching me from a nearby tree and panting like a thirsty dog.  I couldn't catch him on camera, though.  Nothing special on the menu today.  Just leftovers, leftovers.  Dinner was leftover chili with a sunny side up egg on top a block of fresh tofu, to be eaten with a loaf of bread.  Want some?  I love you and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20160421

 In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

There there now, relax your heart and don't despair.  Learn how to waste time, don't be in a big rush like everyone else.  Eventually you will discover that they're in a big rush to catch up with you.  Get some hobbies, waste some time.  And do it without drugs and alcohol.

Yes Honey, I know that there is danger from people working above me.  It's been that way for decades already.  What's more dangerous is to let them work/walk all over me.  I need you to trust me, or better yet trust in Allah.  I keep asking you to pray, so please pray.  I need you to keep yourself safe.  Don't take any unnecessary risks.  And I need you to be loyal, if your love is true.  If you believe in our love.  I love you and I need you.

The corner grocer had some nice eggplant this morning, so I fried that up with onion to be enjoyed with a block of tofu.  Eggplant soaks up grease, then spits it out again, so controlling oil content is the trick to frying eggplant.  I wish I had marinara sauce but I was too lazy to make some, so I used ketchup instead.  I had to finish off the dough, so I made a tortilla, and enjoyed lunch with my Mom's "sambal belacan".  I was stuffed.  I think I made lunch for 4 people.  I was only able to eat 3/4 of it.  I think what was so filling was the combination of tofu and bread.  Dinner was fried stuffed won tons.  Those are so yummy.  I could eat 100 of them, but I only ate 31.

Letter to Erin 20160420

 In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Now now there, you need to relax your heart.  Use your mind to relax your heart, what's the big rush anyway?  You need to learn how to waste time, just do things to waste time, and do it without drugs or alcohol.  How about a video game?  I like to shoot baskets on my cell phone to waste time.  How about playing the piano with only your left hand?  I would ask you to pray if you could be sincere, or pray to pass the time should be OK.  There's no need for despair.  Just let the time pass by.  There's no rush.  Everybody else is rushing around, but not you.

When my uncle came around a couple of days ago, we talked about our backs.  You know, back aches, lower back pain.  I told him that I like to sleep on the floor, because it's great for fixing back pain.  I like sleeping on the floor, it's a habit I'm actually quite reluctant to give up.  If you're lying on that nice, soft mattress, of course I'm going to climb up there and bounce around with you .  But eventually, I would slither back down on the floor... it's so much cooler down here.  Would you like to join me?

Lunch was fried stuffed won tons.  It's such girlie food, and so tasty!  To be enjoyed with my home made hot sauce, the same sauce I toss chicken wings in.  Today's flavor is calamari.  I also put garlic, tofu and julienned kaffir lime leaves in them.  I know you're going to love my fried won tons.  I also got 5 blocks of the best local fresh tofu.  Fresh tofu has a short life in the cooler, so I'll be eating only tofu dishes for the next few days.  Unless you like fermented tofu.  My approach to fresh tofu is to treat it like a staple, like rice, bread, or noodles without compromising its shape.  So for dinner, I had a block of fresh tofu swimming in a broth of ground beef, brown gravy, finely diced garlic, onions, and potatoes, with basil leaves.  Irish stew soup.  Thick but not too thick.  I'd share it with you!  I love you and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20160419

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

So what are you hankering after?  For a child, I mean.  A son or a daughter?  At my age, I want as many healthy children as possible.  Which is the primary reason if I seek 3 wives, if that is the Will of Allah.  I want to name my first son Muhammad and my first daughter Mary.  You can go ahead and name the rest of the kids.  Marrying my Erin has proved to be a momentous task as it is, so I'll take what Allah gives me.  Assuming I survive, of course.

Yeah, yeah.  But this is an important point, because now at 50 I still have a little bit of strength left to look after you and help protect you.  You can tell your family that I will raise our children as Muslims, so as to not abandon their parents when they get old.  So as to not abandon their mother after their father passes away.  If you value this, then you must value my teaching you and our children Islamic values.  Not the values you see from people who call themselves Muslim then drink, gamble, consume interest, blow up innocent people, etc.  It is the end of the world, after all.  Please be close to me, allow me to look after you, and aid me in this.  I love you and I need you.

OK, what's for dinner?  Lunch was noodles in soup as usual (I'm so Asian), but today I ate at Omar's.  I was thinking about skipping dinner, because my uncle and aunt came visiting and there was all this stuff to eat at my parents' house.  We got around to talking about witchcraft, certainly the Malay race is a superstitious bunch.  I know that people always try to hex me, but I am concerned about you.  You might pick a toy or knick knack somewhere, thinking that it's cute, when it's a hex specially prepared for you.  Yes, people do that, and they do that more often than you can imagine.  So remember this: most magic is designed to sow discord between husband and wife, and remember this: no one can harm you except as Allah wills.

After the night prayer, I got around to cooking.  I made a calzone stuffed with chili and cheese.  Looks good, huh?  Alhamdullilah.  Want some?

Letter to Erin 20160418

 In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Please keep your nose clean!  If you're thinking that doing drugs is a good way to attract my attention, then you're mistaken.  I am NOT going to marry a party girl.  I want you to abstain from drugs AND alcohol.  I want to raise a family, and I want to provide my wife and kids the best conditioning that reality has to offer.  I'm sure the whole planet knows that I like pretty blondes, but what's most important to me is your chastity and piety.

I don't normally relate my dreams here for the crowd to see, but last night's dream was so awesomely entertaining that I absolutely have to share it.  The first thing that happened is that I suddenly became pretty.  Plus I was built like a model with a fairly sized rack (not a Laetitia Casta or Eva Herzigova, but around the size of a Gisele Bundchen), my hair was a Dutch bob and all black.  No grey hairs!  I still had my penis, not super hung but good enough.  I was singing to a crowd, not on a stage but at the edge of the crowd, singing to a wall while my voice reflected off the wall and projected everywhere.  Then I joined a production team, and I had my own makeup artist and music crew and stuff.  Then the business manager came up to me and told me that I had to model and sing at the same time.  What!  That's impossible!  I was working at a fashion show at a university or something with all these other models.  It was raining and flooding but I was able to drive my motorcycle through the water.   Suddenly the university turned into a night club but the manager said, "Don't worry, you won't have to work in a bar."  Suddenly, numbers were being called out and I was wearing this modest dress, and one model said, "You have to get out of that dress and get into that white dress and hurry because they're going to call your number!"  The white dress was way short, with the hem right at the crotch.  I was naked and trying to step into the dress but I got tangled up in it because I was wearing these high heels, then they called out my number and my dick was hanging out of the dress, and it was chaos!

I had leftover chili for lunch and I had to finish off the flat noodles, so I had noodles in soup for dinner.  The soup was chicken and basil, extra thick.  Remember what I told you about cooking: use a medium or low flame only unless you have absolute confidence to use a large flame.  Hey, Babe!  Come and be my babe, and share my food with me!  I love you and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20160417

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello, Erin.  I want you to know that I think you are very beautiful, and I love you with all my heart.  I didn't have a very productive morning.  Though I got up early, I slept most of the morning away after watering the plants.  With all that sleep, I should have rocked right through my voice training set.  But I think I'm getting better alhamdulillah, and it's wearing me out.  The increase in knowledge wears me out.  There's simply no perfection in this life.  We may think that because of our abilities or gifts, we deserve the best of everything.  But there's no  perfection in this life.  That's why we cannot keep all the friends that we make through life, for if they don't become corrupt then we do.  So there's no use in being conceited with what we have and have achieved.

Remember I told you that there were hundreds of creepers crawling over the deadwood that I chainsawed on the west border of your house inshaAllah?  I spent the evening breaking them down again with the chainsaw.  But there were too many army ants, so I soaked them down with bug spray.  But there were too many of them, I'll have to let the poison soak in before I try again.  No, I didn't take a photo of it.  Yard work is sweaty work, and I don't feel like handling a chainsaw and a camera at the same time.  I will eventually take photos of the area where I live and what will be your house inshaAllah.  I'm warning you that since I don't have any money, everything still looks squalid (which is not as bad as what it used to look like).  But with a vision of faith and imagination, then anything can be inshaAllah.  Then I had dinner at Ina's.  She has rice in RM1 portions, which I enjoy with iced tea.

I've been a lone wolf most of my life.  You have many friends and some powerful bosses, but none of them have any influence on me.  My Boss is Allah.  But you do have one friend that is with me all the time.  It's Floofy.  I can't explain it, but that cat is a devout advocate of you to me.  She always defends your actions, and always thinks highly of you.  I feel that she is more devoted to you than to me.  I'm just the guy who feeds and protects her.  When you meet her inshaAllah, make sure you thank her, always be gentle with her, and do whatever she asks you to do.

It's going to take me a while to process your Instagram page.  I know you would want me to go through the whole thing.  I'm still angry, and I don't want to consume too much at a time.  If you care about how I feel, then please make an effort to delete any offending posts.  It should be simple for you to understand me: I'm as sensitive as you are.  I love you and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20160416

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How's it going today, my love?  I've been in the garden all morning.  My Mom said that there's a water ration tomorrow, so I had to gather water for the plants.  I also did some harvesting.  I remember saying in January that the heat means that there isn't any weather distortion, but I was wrong.  This drought is not normal.  But God brings blessings with this drought in ways that we can't see, praise be to Allah.  Just like my being poor right now is a blessing, that I don't wind up buying diamond rings for people who don't deserve it.  I heat up so easily though, and I wouldn't mind at all living where it never gets hot.  My power bill is feeling the burn.

I found a nice wallpaper from your page.  I did some editing of course, but I posted my edited wallpaper here for your fans to enjoy.  On my desktop, the clock is right above your head.  By the way, please don't go kissing guys then posting it on your page.  Maybe it was just a platonic friendly kiss, but it makes me look like a jackass and if I behaved with women the same way you behave with men, you would be furious.  You know you would.  So if you're serious about marriage then don't test my heart like that.  Yeah, go ahead and be true to yourself.  I am not allowed to inherit you against your will.

I'm writing this letter earlier than usual, before Friday prayer.  Probably because I chose to inspect your page, and you got under my skin.  I hate being angry, because it can take me years to calm down.  It's because I love you and I need you.  I have for a long time already.  Don't you realize that?  My parents bought me lunch today.  Roti canai (pronounced "chanai" because some big shots decided that "ch" should be spelled as "c" some decades ago), which is a type of India flat bread.  I wonder what's for dinner?  Ugh... I have heartburn.