Letter to Erin 20160601

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello there, my beautiful Erin.  Am I imagining this, or you have acquired a new hobby in past few weeks.  Whether you are aware of this or not, I didn't recognize you when I met you in a dream, even though I knew it was you.  And you're getting better and better at it.  This mysterious new appearance might be useful in not having people bug you all the time when you go out and want to be left alone, but please don't lose the girl I love in your mad new pastime.  You know what would be fun, is to have someone masquerade as you and you masquerade as someone else when you are out and about.  I always thought you would make a great Todd Thomas!  Have fun Sweetie, and keep safe.  I love you and I need you.

You do know that Shadowplay is a registered business of Malaysia.  Right now, I'm busy doing paperwork for the taxman.  I was doing the same thing 6 months ago, but they told me to come back in June.  I got a sad thrill when I showed them the big zero I got for my income.  Because Allah knows what levels of collapse would occur if I don't do my work.  Ya Allah, please help me.  I want to get married.

I haven't cooked anything all day other than my daily coffee and tea.  My Mom gave me rice this morning.  I love my mother's "nasi lemak".  I should have taken a photograph of it, but the thought didn't cross my mind.  I just wanted to eat it.  Then in the evening, my Mom gave me some take out food, which I ate after cutting the grass.  It wasn't enough food for me, though.  Even my cats knew that.  I think after this, I'll make a pizza.  If I have time.  I've got to get this paperwork finished first.

Qur'an 20160601

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

76.  Say, "Will you worship besides Allah, something which has no power either to harm or benefit you?  But Allah it is that Hears and Knows all things."

77.  Say, "O people of the Book!  Exceed not in your religion the bounds transgressing beyond the truth, nor follow the vain desires of people who went wrong in times gone by, who misled many, and strayed from the correct way."

(The Repast 5:76-77)
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Letter to Erin 20160531

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How are you feeling today, my most beautiful, sensitive Sweetheart?  I love you so much.  Right now, I'm watching "Trading Places".   The computer chooses what I watch on my TV, and this movie has been coming up a lot lately.  I love this movie.  I could watch it over and over again.  How are you chillin', Sweetie?  I love you and I need you.

I've been going back and forth downtown a lot lately.  I dislike commute, but I had to feed some cats.  It's been raining a lot lately, but I haven't fallen sick yet.  Alhamdulillah.  I have to sing every day, for the sake of Allah the Most High.

I had a lot of mushrooms, so lunch was noodles in chicken and mushroom soup.  Delicious!  I haven't posted any sort of recipe for my noodles, but noodles is a go-with-the-flow kind of meal.  It depends on what I have in my cooler.  Just like fried rice in a way, but the best fried rice is the art of utilizing leftovers.  I don't have a recipe for my generic curry yet, because I'm still experimenting.  This current batch is pretty darn good, though.  I think I will have more than one version of generic curry, which will be useful because you can just add stuff to it and it will be good to go.  I'll try to always have generic curry and dough in the cooler for you when we marry inshaAllah.  Oh, gluten.  Well, you have to feed the kids, plus thick curry makes a great salad dressing.  Plus you can eat it with a block of tofu.

Qur'an 20160531

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

68.  Say, "O people of the Book!  You have no ground to stand upon unless you stand fast by the Law, the Gospel, and all the revelation that has to you from your Lord."  It is the revelation that has come to you from your Lord that increases in most of them their obstinate rebellion and blasphemy.  But sorrow you not over people without faith.

(The Repast 5:68)
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Letter to Erin 20160530

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  I had trouble starting this letter because I was chowing down on a bag of potato chips.  Made in India!  But how are you feeling, my most beautiful Sweetheart?  Are you having a great time?  It's been a busy day for me.  I've been having to commute downtown a lot lately- you know me, I hate commute.  But today is Sunday, but the traffic was heavy, even early in the morning.  My Dad told me that there's a marathon in town, with a USD 100K grand prize.  Yup, American money.  It's a great idea to have a marathon here.  The land is flat, and the scenery sure beats skyscrapers, sewers, and stores.  I guess God blessed the marathon by holding off the rain until the evening.

I had to clean my parents' bedroom this morning, like I always do every Sunday.  In the evening, after voice training, I took on the task of breaking down that big chunk of tree that that massive storm blew down last week.  It was BIG.  I took a photo of it, and my chainsaw.  The chainsaw is heavy, but I have to admit that it's fun to use.  Just like playing a video game.  After that I took a shower and went downtown, and I got showered on.  I stopped by Ina's for dinner, then went shopping for snacks when I was downtown.  Potato chips!  I also bought some tomatoes, and found some cheap butter and cheese.  The trouble with cheap butter and cheese is the flavor, but sometimes it's just fine.  This cheese had Arabic written all over it.

I still have a lot of encoding to do, so probably no practice tonight.  I also have a song called "Gold" for you.  I sang this song when I was in high school.  I got laughed at.  Ha ha!  Erin, my love.  I love you and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20160529

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi, beautiful Erin!  How are you today, my lovely Sweetheart?  I pray that you are feeling absolutely great, and are keeping safe.  I wish I were with you, honey.  I have to build a house first, so please be patient with me.  For now, I love looking at how beautiful you are, and reading each half of your face.  Allah will bring us together, inshaAllah.  Please have faith in Allah to grant us this miracle of love.  Do not take as friends or protectors those who mock your faith, whether they claim to believe in God or not.  You are my wife, inshaAllah.  I love you and I need you.

What did you eat today, dear?  I had a rather busy morning, which I didn't anticipate.  I opened up some coconuts, had them grated, made coconut milk, then made my generic curry, among all the other tasks I usually do.  I went and got some glutenous rice for my Mom and she got me a pack, so that's what I had for lunch, along with some fish jerky.  I could have eaten more, but I thought it would be enough food.  But it wasn't.  I started off with voice training at full steam, then suddenly after an hour I had to make a crash landing.  My feet wouldn't work, so I had to finish the set sitting down.  This is the first time I sat down to sing in years.  Hey, I kind of like it... but standing up is better.

Hm, fasting month is about one week away.  This means I must have my large portions to sing, and this means I absolutely have to stuff myself in the wee hours of the morning without exception.  This is a man's body: no dainty portions, must have bread and meat!  So for dinner, I made a heaping bowl of noodles in thick broth.  And must snack, as well.  It's time to encoding tonight, so no bass practice.

Please make a donation to a worthwhile cause of a minimum of one US dollar or one Euro.

Please allow me to say something to Antonia.

Dear Antonia, Please make a donation to a worthwhile cause of a minimum of one US dollar or one Euro.

Qur'an 20160529

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

59.  Say, "O people of the Book!  Do you disapprove of us for no other reason than that we believe in Allah, and the revelation that has come to us and that which came before, and that most of you are rebellious and disobedient?"

60.  Say, "Shall I point out to you something much worse than this, by the treatment it received from Allah?  Those who incurred the curse of Allah and God's wrath, those whom some God transformed into apes and swine, those who worshiped evil: these are worse in rank, and far more astray from the even path."

(The Repast 5:59-60)
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Letter to Erin 20160528

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Sweetie!  How's it going today?  How's my gorgeous beloved Erin feeling?  I guess you're not leaving town for the weekend like everyone else, after all, it's your job to leave town.  Right?  I hope you are having tons of fun and keeping safe.  Please do keep safe, because I love you and I need you.

Memorial Day, huh?  The jacket in the photo belonged to Daniel Boregino, a Specialist who was stationed in the Philippines during World War 2.  He passed away in 1992, I think.  All the pins and badges were his except the "girl power" badge: that's mine.  His children are close friends of mine, and they gave me his jacket.  This is the jacket I slept in every night when I was homeless 8 years ago.  My own personal war, I guess.  Ya Allah, thank You for saving my life.  Again.

Oh, I'm so ravenous today!  I could just keep on eating, I don't know why.  I had fried rice for lunch, but that's just too modest for me right now.  I had a couple of cheese sandwiches after voice training, but I decided to go straight into dinner instead of working in the yard.  It was raining, anyway.  So I fried up 46 stuffed won tons.  I would offer you some, but I ate them all.  I think this is my personal record.

Please allow me to say something to Antonia.

Dear Antonia, you look cute with glasses.

Letter to Erin 20160527

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How are you, my beautiful Sweetheart?  Please don't be blue, because I love you and I want to marry you.  I need you.  There's not much going on over here today.  I just stayed at home, and tried to get lots of sleep.  I made a whole bunch of clam won tons for lunch, and I gave my parents some.  I didn't take a picture of that because by the time it occurred to me to take a photo, I had eaten them all.  I was going to go out for dinner, but changed my mind and stayed home, and had a block of tofu instead to go with the baguette that my Mom gave me.  So I guess it turned to be a no-spending day.

I did manage to cut the grass over at your house inshaAllah in the evening.  The yard is looking nice and neat now.  The storm blew a bunch of debris down from the coconut trees and the trees bordering the west side, so I have more debris to burn.  That pile never goes down!  After I got done cutting the grass, it started to rain.  So I said a prayer.  I prayed for our love and marriage together.

Letter to Erin 20160526

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Erin Sweetheart.  Cake, huh?  I've never baked a cake in my life.  I probably could inshaAllah, but I'm not motivated.  I do have an oven, but it can only fit a 10" pizza and only for cooking toppings and melting the cheese.  Now don't get me wrong, I like cake, but I don't eat it very often.  So it suffices me to just buy it when I crave it, or eat it when it's given to me.  Funny though, I had a craving for cake a couple of days ago, but I wound up buying biscuits instead.  Go with the flow.  A slice of cake each, huh?  Why are you kneeling on the floor?  Share the wealth?  That's great to share the wealth, but I need enough wealth to build a house for my Erin and pay for our marriage.  A slice of cake isn't going to cut it.  I love my Erin, and I need her.

Allah has set up this situation, and has given me instructions by inpiration to stand my ground here.  Praise be to Allah.  Not only is it this situation that has captured the attention and imagination of the world, but I believe that Allah has arranged for the safety of me and my family here.  At the same time, the music enriches and empowers the local community and Islam, by the Will of Allah.  I suppose it could be sharing the wealth if I were to set up and play somewhere else as well, NYC for example, but that is out of the scope of my instructions.  Over here Allah is my Boss but elsewhere, I would have to take a human boss to finance the endeavor.  Someone like that might possibly set me and my family up in order to profit other investments.  Something to consider.

It's been a healthy day for me food wise.  I was the market downtown this morning, and I picked up some tofu and won ton skins.  High quality tofu is best when fresh.  So I had a block of tofu with chicken and mole sauce for lunch.  I was about to have dinner at Ina's but was closed, so I had a block of tofu with an egg and the rest of my generic curry, with sliced bread.  Healthy, huh?  Could it be that I'm eating like a supermodel?  Gluten free!  Oh no, I had bread.  Got to get full somehow.

Letter to Erin 20160525

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Wow.  That was an incredible storm.  Subhanallah.  It began right at the mid day prayer.  There was a huge howl and a big crack and I heard things flying around and hitting the ground.  After prayer, I looked outside and saw pieces of the roof from the old house shattered on the ground, and a rotten branch from the old amra tree had broken off and was blocking the driveway.  Doesn't seem like much at the time, then I went downtown to get some tobacco for my Dad, and I saw the devastation.  Huge trees probably decades old each, uprooted, yanked out of the ground as if by some big hand.  Straight trees snapped in half like matchsticks, with the crown blown 10 meters away.  Not just one or two trees, I saw probably about 50 trees or more mangled.  The local council had been busy, breaking down all the huge trees with chainsaws so they don't block the road.  I was so in awe, that I forgot to take photographs.

I have been up since 3:30 am today.  I had a little insomnia, so I did some extra worship.  I blogged my letter to you, and after the dawn prayer I went to the butcher at the Tuesday market to get a cut for my parents, and I got some clams for myself.  I spent the rest of the morning in the kitchen.  I had a light nap before voice training, it wasn't much but I'm surprised I didn't struggle through it.  It must have been the excitement of the storm.  The temperature is so awesomely cool right now.  No sweat!  No need for AC!  Alhamdulillah!

Clams need to be processed immediately before they die.  Some clams live longer than others, but not these.  I think I showed them to you before, these are the "snails of a thousand brains" type of clams.  I separate the meat from the broth, and today I use the broth for my noodles at lunch, and I freeze the meat.  Dinner was 3 cheeseburgers.  Not very photogenic, mostly because I prefer sliced bread over burger buns, so I didn't take a picture of dinner.  But you're welcome to have one.  Darling Erin, I love you and I need you.

Letter to Erin 20160524

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

NYC home.  Yeah, that's cool.  What's up, Sweetheart?  Are you chillin'?  I'm writing a letter.  These letters are important, not just to you and me, so I spend a lot of time writing.  I spent the evening cutting grass around your house inshaAllah.  Grass sure grows fast around here.  There's some clover, but they only just got started after the long drought, so if I keep the other grass short, then the clover can take over.  Until the next drought.  There's no running water over there, and if there were running water, I wouldn't be able to water the clover regularly.  Bananas grow like mad there, though.  Monkey food.  Do you want a pet monkey?  I might be able to get you one.  I don't want it, though.

I'm just trying my best to live honorably.  Integrity is such a difficult life, but you do get used to it.  I'm just keeping the faith, I keep on trekkin', a little bit each day and inshaAllah, there will be a house someday.  A house for the woman I love.  I love you and I need you.  So don't let the actions and words of those who race each other into the abyss grieve you.  You are my girl.

Today I spent the morning in the kitchen.  I made a little tutorial on peeling bamboo shoots.  Bamboo shoots are bitter when fresh, so I marinade them in salt until the bitterness goes away.  My Mom likes them bitter.  I told her I was going to give her some bamboo shoots, and she asked "Fresh or sour?"  They're fresh, Mom.  I also made mole sauce.  You and I know that mole sauce and avocados are a heavenly match.  I had rice with chicken in mole sauce for dinner.  I actually didn't have enough chocolate, so I added Milo (malted chocolate powder) instead.  Worked great.  Just keep on adding Milo until the sauce turns sweet.

Do you like Bob Marley?  I posted "The Redemption Song" for you here.  I don't agree with the statues, but the performance is great.  Now please excuse me, I must spend some time practicing bass.

Letter to Erin 20160523

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hi Erin!  How are you feeling today, my dearest?  I pray that you are feeling great, and having a great time.  I love you Erin, and I need you.  I am still trying to whittle down that pile of debris.  It won't go down!  The pile just won't shrink!  It's been raining every day lately, and the moisture has made the wood rubbery, so I'm having a tough time trying to saw through it.  It's time to cut the grass again.  I can't stand seeing the grass long over at your house inshaAllah.  But I have to get that pile of debris to fit into my fire pit before I move on to something else.

Bob Cat is not dead!  No no, my Bobby Wobby is still alive!  Alhamdulillah.  I don't want to go through the details of this little drama here in this public place, but it sure seems like Bob played a game with all of us.  The nutshell is that he was missing for 4 days, so I thought he was dead.  Then he showed up after voice training today, laughing at me then marking my safety boots.  So I took a photo of him today to show that he's still alive.

My Dad bought me lunch today, so I didn't cook my lunch.  I always skip breakfast because I eat too much, but lunch was rather late today.  It didn't get to me until 20 minutes before voice training.  Which is cool.  It was rice and chicken, with a side of curry, which my Dad got at one of his favorite restaurants in Arau, the royal town about 12km away.  I usually have noodles for lunch, but today I had it for dinner.  I had to use up that fish head, so I made soup with it.  The broth was surprisingly dark but tasty, and I gave the kittens the head as a snack.  Full of vegetables today, from my garden.

Letter to Erin 20160522

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Well, hi hi hi to you too.  It would be awesome if life were just fun and laughs, but right now it's time to get serious.  Don't you be concerned about what I have to do, right now you need to pay attention to your career.  Accept it or not, right now you are at the top of your game.  So right now, you need to regard and behave that others are wanting your position.  You need to have absolute confidence as to who your allies and enemies are, and what tasks are of priority.  Did you inspect your finances like I told you?  I want and need you to keep safe, and take care of yourself.  I love you and I need you.

Let's discuss the nature of jealousy.  I told this story before, and it's time to tell it again.  I seek refuge with Allah from Satan the rejected.

In the Qur'an chapter 5 verses 27-31 tells the story about the two sons of Adam who presented a sacrifice, and it was accepted from one and not the other.  Said the latter, "Be sure I will kill you."  "Surely," said the former, "Allah does accept the sacrifice of those who are righteous."

28.  "If you do stretch your hand against me to kill me, it is not for me to stretch my hand against you to kill you, for I do fear Allah, the Cherisher of the worlds."

29.  "For me, I intend to let you draw on yourself my sin as well as yours, for you will be among the companions of the fire, and that is the reward of those who do wrong."

30.  The soul of the other led him to the murder of his brother: he murdered him, and became one of the lost ones.

31.  Then Allah sent a raven who scratched the ground to show him how to hide the shame of his brother.  "Woe is me," said he.  "Was I not even  able to be as this raven, and hide the shame of my brother?"  Then he became full of regrets.

You see that jealousy is a spiritual problem.  People feel the way the feel, and they act because they can't help it, because that's how they feel.  That's their excuse, anyway.  But it's an excuse that's not acceptable to God.  But what do we do in the meanwhile?  Let them get away with their shit?  I don't think I'm as elevated as the righteous brother in the above story.  If I had loved ones to protect, I wouldn't let them do whatever they pleased.  But even that, sometimes my hands are tied.  No revenge, only patience.  From Allah is our origin, and to Allah is our return.

I had to finish off that thick generic curry I made, so I heated it up and added the rest of my Mom's "sambal belacan" (hot red pepper condiment) which I also had to use up.  Then I made my bread nuggets to go with it.  Dinner was a heaping helpful of fried calamari.  Want some?