Letter to Julia 20111031

WOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOO! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! HOORAY!!!!!!

Is it your birthday yet? It's almost time for your birthday! When is your birthday? I'm sure your birthday is coming up soon! Oh, I'm so excited! It's nearly time for my sweetie's birthday!

Well, I don't really celebrate birthdays, so I wouldn't really care if my birthday weren't celebrated. As Lilith Sternin-Crane so glibly put it: "I fail to see how the reminder of one's passing years can be a cause for celebration." I just want you to know that I (somewhat) remember your birthday, and to me everyday with you is a cause for celebration.

Now, remember that the goal of our marriage is to slow everything down, and truly love and cherish each other and our life together. Is that OK with you? Yeah, we have no privacy anyway, and I'm sure everyone else out there would love to run us both into the ground as quickly as possible just for the sake of entertainment, but that doesn't mean that we should allow them to do that. So let's slow everything down. SLOW SLOW SLOW. I'm a slow worker anyhow, lazy too, and if anyone would tell me how to create music, then they can just do so themselves without my involvement. I try to have the "Act of God" kind of approach, where things build up oh so slowly, then suddenly it comes out of nowhere, from a direction that is not perceived. SLOW SLOW SLOW. Meanwhile, I get to make the love to my sweetie, tend to my garden, experiment with cooking, watch TV, read comics, and play video games. What's the rush? By the Will of Allah, to good people come good things in good time, and the evil ones will get their just dues rammed into them when they least expect it, from directions they did not perceive.

Hey, I'll write back Wednesday or Thursday to wish you happy birthday. It is your birthday, isn't it? I'm such a scatterbrain sometimes! Musicians, huh?

Letter to Julia 20111029

Hi Julia my sweetie, how are you? Working as usual, I see. Things are rather.... strange here, as strange a little village can get. Then again, the world has become a small town. I've been spending much time in the garden, cutting and burning. THe music school is renovating, so I haven't had to go there recently. Thus, I do gardening, and enjoy my laptop as Allah allowed me to have it back recently. Alhamdulillah. It's nice to play GTA again, and all the other video games I've collected over the years (besides Krush, Kill and Destroy). Plus my comic collection, which I read while watching Shadowplay TV, which is much smoother on my old laptop, as opposed to the decrepit old computer that I had been using which I dug up from the trash. Your photos are much sharper, too. Is that your left eye gleaming while walking the Victoria's Secret runway? You be a good girl now. Remember that almost everyone is corrupt nowadays, which is out of fashion. Passe. Blah.

You and I, we waste too much of our energy on people who consider themselves self-sufficient, who try to break our hearts with their words, who refuse to show God any respect because they want to have their asses kicked. But it is not our place to kick their asses, all we can do is to turn away and leave God to deal with them eventually. Let them bark and whine, you just maintain your prayers, and don't don't pass over the sincere searchers. We pass them over because of their humility, in preference to people who have wealth and power. Don't pass them by. Please find a way to help them.

Qur'an 20111029

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

88. Strain not your eyes at what We have bestowed on certain classes of them, nor grieve over them, but lower your wings to the believers.

89. And say, "I am indeed he that warns openly and without ambiguity."

90. As We sent down on those who divided,

91. As have made the Qur'an into shreds.

92. Therefore, by your Lord, We will, of a surety, call them to account,

93. For all their deeds.

94. Therefore expound openly what you are commanded, and turn away from those who join false gods with Allah.

The Rocky Tract 15:88-94
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I am indeed he that warns openly and without ambiguity.

Letter to Julia 20111026

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

So as we wait, as we wait for Allah to bring us together, it is easy to succumb to emotions of futility, and actions of despair. But I have not given up hope of our love materializing: it even seems like I'm ready to take our love to the grave, and the next life. Patience is truly a gift from Allah. Meanwhile, it is my duty to teach you what I know about the Qur'an, and others who happen to read this my love letter to you. I pray that Allah will grant you patience and resolve, and do know that Allah is Oft-Forgiving, most Merciful. And that God's penalty will indeed be the most grievous penalty.

Materialize? That is what most people expect out of faith, in the name of "pragmatism". They won't even open their hearts to listen to anything else! If I earn heaven, then Allah will wipe out this resentment that I feel in my heart, and the fatigue as well. Resentment in general my beloved, not for you. When the angels visited Abraham, he didn't recognize them, in fact he felt fearful of them (Al-Hijr 15:52). This is where I believe that Abraham never received any visitation from angels until he was old, therefore his awareness of God was achieved by his own intelligence, at a young age too, growing up in a family of pagans at that. Which is possibly why he is the most beloved of humans to Allah. Anyway, the angels told Abraham good news that he was about to have a son. He retorted that they brought him good news that he was old, then asked them what the good news was. They replied that they had brought the truth, and told him not to despair. He said, "And who despairs of the mercy of his Lord, but such as go astray?" (Al-Hijr 15:56). Then, Abraham asked the angels what their business was. They said they have been to a people in sin (Sodom and Gomorrah), excepting the followers of Lot, for they were to be saved.

Except his wife, who they have ascertained would lag behind. Do you lag behind? You are not my wife, so now I am as yet unmarried. And it is not your fault, for when on the global stage, one can only take what God gives, as the situation is out of your reach. Right? The sickness of Sodom and Gomorrah has become widespread all over the world, so much that one in my position, this "chick singer", is out of place to have a wife.

Letter to Julia 20111024

YOOOOOOLIIIIIIEEEEEEE!!!

Hi Julia! No, I'm not upset with you: you are my girl, my love, my beautiful Julia. If anything, what I am is proud of you, and protective of you. I don't want you to get hurt, or come into any harm. I want you to be happy, I want us to be happy together. But we must remember my dearest, that this world is not perfect, but we can have strong resolve, so that we can earn perfection in the next life. Sure, we make mistakes, but we must try with all our might to be good and faithful and righteous, in the sight of Allah. Then Allah will make the world recognize us as righteous people.

Letter to Julia 20111022

"She's got a ticket to ride, and she don't care!" It's nice to be the woman, huh? Men have to become soldiers, and stuff like that. Can you live without me?

Well, I do want you, and you to be my bride. What matters most is that you be sincere with God, and maintain your prayers. Try to make your business revolve around your prayers. Think you can do that? In times of chaos, the most important thing to do is maintain your prayers. It is the order and consistency sanctified by Allah, it is the soothing security amidst the loss of control. I believe that making business revolve around your prayers is the greatest form of control a human can have, insyaAllah.

Have you ever met an angel? I have. Perhaps someday, I will describe the encounter. Allah only sends angels to decide a matter and they generally appear in human form, so a visit from an angel would not benefit a skeptic. Skeptics believe in what their ancestors practised, and that illumination and intoxication are one and the same.

Letter to Julia 20111020

Yay! I finally got my old laptop running again! Alhamdulillah! Thanks, Mom! Thus, I can continue work on "Woo Hoo". I started "Woo Hoo" way back in 2006, while I was still in the USA. Actually, it goes back even further than that, when the mysterious piano player put down his part on one of the songs, way back in 1993 (I think) while I was still living in Salt Lake City. Yeah, I'm slow, but since this is a labor of love, and love for Allah, I totally intend to be finicky and meticulous in the production of this album. SLOW SLOW SLOW. Anyway, I don't usually give away the concept of a concept album, but since I'm being so slow, I might as well this time. Not that it's going to make me work any faster on future albums. Anyway again, "Woo Hoo" is a concept album about the Curse of Allah on those who impose interest and slavery. The story will be told from the perspective of evil, except the last word will be from Allah. I'll probably be misunderstood anyway, but oh well. It is not the Plan of Allah to guide everyone. It is part of the general warning that all will be brought to face their deeds on Judgement Day.

I am in the process of finishing off the instrumental tracks, just tidying up and making sure everything is in place, so I don't have to backtrack. Then I will do the vocal tracks, which may take forever. God, I hate chick singers sometimes: damn divas! Then I will complete the storyline, which may take forever again. After that, the whole thing will be taken to America for the mysterious piano player to do his piano parts. I may have to go with the album to Salt Lake City. How many years so far? 5 years since 2006. Finally, it will be mastering, pressing/packaging, and distribution. Then maybe I'll set up a stall by the roadside, and sell mangos and cds. Might as well, seeing how destitute I've been kept.

But I'm sure Allah has a better plan for the music if it pleases Allah. InsyaAllah. I love you, Julia!

Letter to Julia 20111018

YOOOOOLIIIIIIEEEEEE!

Hello, my luscious beauty! Do you believe? We all run out of time, Julia. So, now is your, and others who believe, time to maintain regular prayers, and spend out of the sustenance that God has given you, secretly and openly, before the time comes when there can be no more deals, and no more making friends.

I'm sure you've seen me nowadays. I really don't have much to give at all. I've been eating amra, and cooking everything out of my rice pot. You must have observed from way over there wherever you are how so many people make money off the music while I get nothing? It's obvious to the world, isn't it? I can only ask Allah to provide me with the few worldly things I desire, and better yet, an honored place in heaven. But what do I want right now? Ya Allah, please give me my Julia, and a home with all the necessary things to make us secure and happy together. Please make us great Muslims with good health, beauty, and safety together, with beautiful, happy, healthy, and pious children. Please give me a small local car, and a truck for the big hauls if I have the room for it. Please give me what I need to experiment, record and perform music, therefore I don't have a precise list of items I need: creative experimentation is a go-with-the-flow thing for the purpose of staying unique and ahead, as You know. Please give me the parts I need to fix my old laptop so I can continue my work on "Woo Hoo", and also a modern console computer, and the tiniest laptop for me to take anywhere and everywhere. Please stabilize my finances so I never have to worry about money ever again: I don't want to be filthy stinking rich, I just want to complete my work/worship in comfort, and eat well.

You should ask Allah for what you want as well, Julia.

Qur'an 20111018

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

30. And they set up as equal to Allah, to mislead from the Path! Say, "Enjoy! But verily you are making straightway for hell!"

Abraham 14:30
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Enjoy! But verily you are making straightway for hell!

Letter to Julia 20111017

You are a beauty, Julia! Ah, how I LOVE the way you look. Please don't change a thing about yourself, you are the perfect girl for me, how I love you so. I love your intensity, I love your lips, I love your neck, I love your nose, truly you are the most beautiful girl in the world to me.

There's always something to do in this yard. The trees are big and fully grown, and I can't take all of them down even if I wanted to. I've been clearing out the back, by the cesspool. It's doesn't smell like anything, there's just too much vegetation there growing by a ditch which is the neighbor's property. It needs to be bricked up, but it must be cleared out first. Now my parents want me to clear out the entire area which belongs to my mother's family, which is a lot of work, and I'm slow. I work like an ant, I have an increasing pile of work to do, I have more work to do than anyone I know, and I'm rather lazy as well. Only human, you know. Anyway, there's nothing harder to clear than tree stumps, and the ground here is too hard to dig all by my lonesome. I will need a machine for some of this work.

Ah, you must be the practical and shrewd half of our affectionate pair! You ponder on every word of each contract and agreement to make sure you get the best monies thereof, and the best loan factor. Perhaps you perceive that what is practical for us is to have a house large enough to fit your 2000 piece fine china collection, with a walk-in air conditioned closet filled with $10,000 dresses, expensive jewelery, plus extensive hat and shoe collection, for it reflects our rockstar and supermodel couple status. I do not want to restrict you, but I say I am practical and shrewd as you, plus I'm older than you, and I don't want to drag around superfluous and heavy glitter that I don't need. I want to grow slowly, because I have yet to truly know you, my beloved Julia, and our little house grows gradually with the roots of our love and family. Like a tree. And didn't I say you can have an entire room for your wardrobe? Instead of being the flashy and extravagant wealthy celebrity couple who intent on showing off their power and popularity, we are a spiritual and humble wealthy reclusive couple who focus on our love and happiness together. And to do it all without oppressing the poor by consuming interest. InsyaAllah.

Letter to Julia 20111015

Aw, c'mon Julia! I really prefer small houses, because it's within my strength to maintain! Sure, this house may not look like much right now, but once I jazz it up, you'll never look at a big house ever again. Besides, like I said before, we can build extensions as necessary, and only children would make that necessary. We'll find a way to park your Mercedes-Benz in the back where no one can look at it, OK? All I need is a small local car. But most likely, we'll just be riding our motorcycles everywhere: it's easier to park! We can go and sip tea in the yard if you're feeling confined, I'll even hook up an extension to your satellite TV so you can watch the Bundesliga underneath the mango tree. You can even watch it in bed if you like, just don't make me look at it, because it might turn me off. I've never had much of a taste for watching a bunch of men running around on a field, so I'll have my own TV. Shadowplay TV, of course. The randomizer is the programmer for Shadowplay TV, so that I guess means Allah takes over my computer and chooses the show for me. Lately "Jurassic Park" and "Arrisalah" has been playing repeatedly. But seriously Julia, please don't desire a big house, I really like small houses, with the perfect amount of room and possessions.

Why, do you have female buddies that have become refugees because they converted to Islam? We can't allow them to go back to an oppressive situation. Anyway, I've gotten rather fond of this little yard I have. I've just been observing the miniature vines grow. There are some that have blue flowers and some that have yellow flowers. These ground vines don't grow tall, and they are very pretty. My garden is mostly being taken over by clover which doesn't have flowers, but they attract hundreds of tiny grey butterflies about 1/2 inch across.

Of course I must be grateful for what Allah gives me. That is partially why I am satisfied with a small house. But if Allah gives me more, then I must be appreciative of that as well. I tell you again Julia, I have the strength for a small house insyaAllah, and if I were to have a large house, then I would probably choose a small space to call my own. You and the kids can maintain the rest of the house, just remember that good help is very hard to find. In general, we must try to keep things small, and grow as slowly as possible. With that in mind, make sure you keep all your valuable contacts (friends, medical, industrial, etc) written down on paper. It doesn't matter which part of the planet they are, Mrs. Global. Me? Allah is my friend. InsyaAllah.

Letter to Julia 20111012

Now, all this poverty seems like some sort of plot, especially considering the level of influence the music brings. You know, what is called a conspiracy theory. How else to exert power except by plotting and planning? There is no other way. Even in the smallest circles and tiniest villages, much plotting and planning occurs.

True, I am not a prophet. I am a servant of Allah. My leader is prophet Muhammad (peace be on him), so if I were conveying any sort of message, it would be the same message as prophet Muhammad (peace be on him). This has been my mode of operation for many years already, and becoming more and more fine-tuned as I gain more wisdom and understanding of the Qur'an, insyaAllah. Ever since America. So if there, rather since there is plotting against me, then they are plotting against my Islam because I serve to please Allah with music, therefore they are unbelievers (kafir). Ever since America. What's odd is that I have no desire for fame or power or great wealth, other than to live well and happily with my Julia in this small house, and to please Allah with music.

Qur'an 20111012

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

42. Those before them did devise plots, but in all things the master-planning is Allah's. God knows the doings of every soul, and soon will the unbelievers know who gets home in the end.

43. The unbelievers say, "No messenger are you." Say, "Enough for a witness between me and you is Allah, and such as have knowledge of the Book."

The Thunder 13:42-43
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Enough for a witness between me and you is Allah, and such as have knowledge of the Book.

Letter to Julia 20111010

So, you are my mate, come and dance with me and follow my lead. As the dominoes fall, we shall see that there is no such thing as coincidence or luck, it's just that our human scope is too meager to notice the connections and nuances. Or we are simply too self-absorbed to care about anything else than "what's in it for me."

I finally got all that trash burned even though most of it was wet, there were enough dry pieces to burn up the rest. Just in time for the next storm, too: it's getting rather dark out there. I don't know if I would get a chance to blog my love for you today. I have to fry some fish for my Mom, hang up her wash, then cook my own meal. Today's menu is teriyaki beef, then I have to cook up a batch of chili. A batch of chili takes hours to brew, but I should be able to get it done while I do my vocal training and gardening in the afternoon. There's still much to do: I have to clean out all the vegetation in the path of the brick wall I plan to build. Which is not easy, because the plants here regenerate very quickly. Please forgive me for not starting on the inside yet, as it is, I'm too lazy to even keep up with myself. But insyaAllah, I'll put in a more vaunted effort once the modifications have taken place. For now, the yard looks better than the house, so the first thing to do is to paint the outside wall. No money for paint yet!

Qur'an 20111011

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

30. Thus have We sent you among a people before whom have peoples passed away, in order that you might rehearse unto them what We sent down unto you by inspiration. Yet do they reject the Compassionate One! Say, "God is my Lord! There is no god but God! On God is my trust, and to God do I turn!"

31. If there were a Qur'an with which mountains were moved, or the earth were cloven asunder, or the dead were made to speak... but truly, the command is with Allah in all things! Do not the believers know, that had Allah willed, God could have guided all humankind? But the unbelievers, never will disaster cease to seize them for their deeds, or settle close to their homes, until the Promise of Allah comes to pass, for verily, Allah will not fail in God's promise.

32. Mocked were the messengers before you, but God granted respite to the unbelievers, and finally God punished them. Then how was God's requital!

33. Is then God Who stands over every soul, over all it does...? And yet they ascribe partners to Allah. Say, "But name them! Is it that you will inform God of something God knows not on earth, or is it a show of words?" No, to those who believe not, their pretence seems pleasing, but they are kept back from the Path. And those whom Allah leaves to stray, no one can guide.

34. For them is a penalty in the life of this world, but harder is the penalty of the Hereafter, and they have no defender against Allah.

35. The parable of the Garden which the righteous are promised: beneath it flow rivers, perpetual is the enjoyment thereof and the shade therein. Such is the end of the righteous, and the end of the unbelievers is the fire.

36. Those to whom We have given the Book rejoice at what has been revealed unto you. But there are among the clans those who reject a part thereof. Say, "I am commmanded to worship Allah, and not to join partners with God. Unto God do I call, and unto God is my return."

The Thunder 13:30-36
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God is my Lord! There is no god but God! On God is my trust, and to God do I turn!

But name them! Is it that you will inform God of something God knows not on earth, or is it a show of words?

I am commmanded to worship Allah, and not to join partners with God. Unto God do I call, and unto God is my return.

Letter to Julia 20111010

YOOOOOLIIIIIEEEEEE!

Do you know what I miss the most about the city, Julia? It's all the stuff I accumulated before I got ousted from my home and possessions. Sure, it's because I was forced to quit the pizza job, and when I did 5 hours of kitchen work yesterday, the pain in my leg remended me why. I sometimes think that I should have been allowed sustenance as a musician while I was there, but that's all passe now. Anyway, the American brands are of course hard to get over here, but what are the American brands anymore? Everything is made in China, or somewhere in Asia nowadays. I guess I mean the musical instruments, and stuff like that. But it's not even that, that I miss. It's the accumulation of the little things like my collection of plugs, adaptors, and transformers, the antiques and uniques, like my Intel PC featuring a DX386 CPU with a math co-processor which I used only for recording music but it also had a 14.4 kbps modem which allowed me to surf the web way back in 1998, a 3W stereo tube amp which I found at a yard sale, which electrocuted me every time I touched it but drove a pair of 2" speakers like a screaming banshee, my itty-bitty mp3 randomizer with a battery powered fm transmitter relay system which broadcast Shadowplay Radio 24 hours everyday waaaaay below 1W, my tiny little 2.1 stereo system with just a 4" speaker for the subwoofer, but it was the loudest compact vocal amp I ever experienced such as the neighbors complained about the volume on numerous occasions. Not that I wanted to rile the neighbors, but the number of people getting upset about the music is a gauge of Rock and Roll. But as for the city itself, I don't miss it at all.

Of course there was all that music that was lost, which was crap anyway because I had no wisdom back then, but they are my memories, the witnesses to how deep into the abyss I ventured when Allah saved me every time. And I did wander aimlessly, I wasn't searching for Allah because I never really lost my faith, but I wandered for the sake of music business. Allah was and is my only friend on countless occasions, I truly appreciate that. So when I got older, I gave the music back to Allah. I guess that means that the music is for Allah. I wouldn't call the music a collection of hymns though. It's still rock music.

Qur'an 20111010

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

27. The unbelievers say, "Why is not a sign sent down to him from his Lord?" Say, "Truly Allah leaves to stray whom God will, but God guides to Godself those who turn to God in penitence."

The Thunder 13:27
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Truly Allah leaves to stray whom God will, but God guides to Godself those who turn to God in penitence.

Letter to Julia 20111009

Yeah, I would LOVE to see you in a nice business suit. The problem is, then I would want to show you off when it is necessary for you to hide your beauty because there are too many jealous people out there who would want to try and harm you because you are so beautiful, so you would have to wear a suit that's modest and understated in public. Therefore, you would wear the sexy suits (you know, the ones with short skirts, or the jacket and dress... aaaaaaaa!) in the bedroom where I can play business with you, but it would be inconvenient to have to wear a suit to bed. Think of the dry cleaning bill! Yet another expense! I hope someone is keeping an estimated expense ledger. I feel sorry for you that you go through so much trouble just for being so beautiful, but I also feel sorry for myself that I have to wait in order to snuggle with you while you wear a sexy suit.

Qur'an 20111009

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

15. Whatever beings there are in the heavens and the earth do prostrate themselves to Allah, with goodwill or in spite of themselves, so do their shadows, in the mornings and evenings.

16. Say, "Who is the Lord and Sustainer of the heavens and the earth?" Say, "Allah." Say, "Do you then take protectors other than God, such as have no power either for good or for harm to themselves?" Say, "Are the blind equal with those who see? Or the depths of darkness equal with light?" Or do they assign to Allah partners who have created as God has created, so that the creation seemed to them similar? Say, "Allah is the Creator of all things. God is the One, the Supreme and Irresistible."

The Thunder 13:15-16
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Who is the Lord and Sustainer of the heavens and the earth?

Allah.

Do you then take protectors other than God, such as have no power either for good or for harm to themselves?

Are the blind equal with those who see? Or the depths of darkness equal with light?

Allah is the Creator of all things. God is the One, the Supreme and Irresistible.

Letter to Julia 20111008

Wha... I need winter gear? How is Germany in winter? I hope you will show me the countryside. I love cheese! I need to start a fine cheese collection. That means I need a cellar, or an extra large freezer! And an extra large cooler! I wonder how the customs here would react to cheese. However, I don't think I would get there in time for the first snowfall, my beloved. Please be patient, and pray. Hey, who says I'm going to Germany? You temptress! Remember that I need a certain amount of wealth, my OWN wealth, which comes directly from Allah, for us to get married. What can happen, does happen. InsyaAllah! So please be patient, and pray. I still don't know your ring size, by the way. Is it 7? I don't know! We'll just have to go shopping for a ring together. We'll do all our shopping together, insyaAllah. You can help me buy clothes, and I want to see you in a nice business suit. Then you can follow me to the music store, and hold the boombox while I test musical instruments.

I escorted my parents to the hospital this morning. Like I told you, my Mom is going in for surgery, so I think I will be quite occupied while she is recovering. I'm still chopping up those branches I told you about into kindle for the bonfire. Everything is still wet, I tried to light it today but it wouldn't burn. The grass has gotten so long from all that rain. Oh Julia, there is a pair of black fantails hanging out at the back of the house! Oh, pretty birds, pretty birds!

Ah, the simple things. Like love and happiness, huh? Mundane it is or could be, but I must be somewhat more normal than I figured. I certainly don't ask to hasten the evil in preference to the good, simply for the sake of disbelief and cynicism. I don't want it to flood! I have all that trash to burn! Ya Allah, please have mercy on Julia and I. Please make our path to You easy. and grant us stability and happiness together in this life, as well as the next life.

Letter to Julia 20111006

Of course, I still have some traveling left to do. Do you recall my telling you so? I still have to complete my Hajj workload, then I have to go to Salt Lake City to keep my promise with the mysterious piano player. Then, there is you. Once we are married, I absolutely won't have you travel alone. Wherever you wish to go, then I will have to accompany you, so please don't make it too often and unpredictable, for you will have countless people hanging on a string, if Allah perfects my plan. Then, there is my journey to get you. I may go to either America or Germany to find you. I don't know which country yet. Most likely Germany, because I should meet your parents, plus you should have a stronger network there to keep an eye on me because I will be traveling alone. However, I don't speak a word of German other than the stuff I learned from reading all those war comics as a kid. I certainly don't want to go to New York City, because I hate the city in general, and I feel that I would despise New York City. I think of America because I have to go to Salt Lake City anyway. I don't know which country to go right now! What is important is that you make yourself easy for me to find. If you are difficult for me to find, then there can be no marriage between us. PLEASE DON'T FORGET THAT. Also, please prepare a chaperone for your journey to married bliss (insyaAllah), I suggest she be your maid-of-honor. More details to come as the clock ticks. Of course, you could always come to me, but I don't expect you to.

Oh, it's been raining again. I have a lot of vegetation to burn. I had to prune off huge, heavy branches of the tall mango and amra trees in my yard, because people were taking fruit without asking. Certainly, I can't eat all of that fruit, so I have no problem in giving it away, or even selling it. But I'm shy, so I don't go knocking on doors to give away fruit, so I eat what I can, and let the amra fall to the ground for the chickens to eat. No one seems to sell or buy amra, but I might have the nerve to sell ripe mangos by the side of the road someday. Maybe. Anyway, I chopped off the limbs that were hanging over the road, broke them down, and arranged them neatly into a bonfire stack to be burned when it dries up. Hey, it looks almost like a flower arrangement! It must be all those flower arrangement videos I've been watching from Martha Stewart Weddings. Too bad I've gotten too manly-looking to wear a wedding dress. **sigh**

Letter to Julia 20111005

Do remember though my love, that the goal is to slow down, and try to appreciate our love and life together, and do the best we can with what Allah gives us. Just because your workload increases after we unite doesn't mean you have to go to them in order to work with them. You must take whoever is willing to come to you, and we must live within our means. This is a time-consuming process, so we must practise it now. We must make like a tree and take root, to create some stability in our lives, not simply for ourselves, but for our children. This is another reason why I don't like big houses: good help is so hard to find. I want to be able to maintain the house with my own strength if I'm forced to, which is usually the case with this thing called "life". And I'm lazy enough as it is.

Qur'an 20110905

108. Say, "This is my way. I do invite unto Allah on evidence clear as the seeing with one's eyes, I and whoever follows me. Glory to Allah! And never will I join gods with Allah!"

Joseph 12:108
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This is my way. I do invite unto Allah on evidence clear as the seeing with one's eyes, I and whoever follows me. Glory to Allah! And never will I join gods with Allah!

Letter to Julia 20111003

Hi Gorgeous! Have you been staying busy? I'm sure you have. Just make sure you take good care of yourself, and maintain your prayers. I was thinking about how unlike a scenester I am, or ever was. When I was a young musician, of course I would make the efforts and pains to socialize and attend parties, in the name of music business. Like any immature idiot, I thought I was somewhat special for doing so. I would try to start up a band with anybody God put in my path, just for the sake of having a band, and playing out. There was never any method per se, and I would just write any song that came to my fingers, and instantly gave it for the band to play. But at the end of the workday at 2 or 3am, I would always wind up alone in my apartment. Now, I am exhausted of trying to party and socialize and being who I'm not for the sake of music business. Becoming a drummer is most useful for writing music, because I can complete entire songs in my head just by tapping out beats, and humming the melody in secret, while weeding out my chilli patch. Well, that's not necessarily my creative protocol. Just as long as I'm left alone with the means to produce music. I'm a crummy politician, huh? I'm vague as hell, huh? I'm also much older than most active musicians, but alhamdulillah (praise Allah), I'm still alive. I'm certainly a much different scenester than I was 20 years ago. So, what is the type of scene I am in now?

Well, I'm far from done, because I have a spiritual agenda to please Allah with music, and I am not allowed to quit. So, what is the type of scene I am in now? I don't know! Let's just say that I want to be happy, with my sweetie. I can tell you what the makeup of the audience of my live shows are/should be. I have absolutely no intention or desire to tour, so for concerts here in Perlis, the audience must be divided into 3 sections. Section one is for single females 13 and over, section two is for married couples with/or children under the age of 13, and section three is for single males 13 and over.