A brave new world

Hi Honey!  How are you feeling today, my love?  It's certainly a brave new world, and I kind of feel that we are Adam and Eve in a way.  But in a good way, OK?  I don't want to make the same mistakes they made.  But wherever you go, there you are.  People are people all over the world, so don't expect them to behave any better here that they do in America.  What matters is that we will be together, inshaAllah.  So let's work towards that.

Hey there Natty Honey!  Are you having tons of fun?  I hope you are.  Luka is doing OK, poor kitty.  It must be tough for her to stay in the house all her life, but she is a princess after all.  She's getting used to the restraining collar.  One good thing about the collar is that it covers up the food bowl, so no one can steal her food!

The corporate kitty

Hi Erin!  How are you, Honey?  How was your day today?  I hope it went fantastic.  I'm in a much better mood.  I just got word that most people think that I am some glamorous diva with long black hair, like my avatar.  Most other people think that that glamorous diva with long black hair is just a stage persona, and that I am actually just a typical white girl with neck length auburn hair, and I wear blue jeans and a red sweater, and I drive a red Porsche.  Isn't that amazing?  The power of the mind is truly mind boggling.  Anyway, Floofy's favorite canned cat food was sold out at the regular supermarket, so I had to hunt for a substitute.  It turns out that a few other companies made the same recipe, they even called it the same name.  It's just fish in prawn jelly, but I'm glad other companies have caught on to Floofy's food, so I don't have to hunt high and low for a specific brand.  And yes, the other brand was acceptable.  So far.  Meanwhile I had been grinding up the dry cat food and drenching it in water for her, and she expressed that it was also acceptable.  By leaving some poop in an open place for me to look at.  Even though it was large, it was soft.  So which do I choose?  I'll go the safe route, and mix canned cat food with rice.  It must be torture for businesses to follow the whims of a cat, but I guess that's what the pet food industry is all about.

Hey there, Natty Honey!  Oh don't worry about Luka, she's doing just fine.  The wound has turned dry and pink, and she can poop and pee just fine.  I was worried yesterday that her rectum and vagina were damaged, so I was going to take her to the vet this morning (the vet is closed on weekends in this town).  But her condition improved markedly, so the emergency is over, alhamdulillah.  Today the computer wants you to watch another Bond movie, "Licence To Kill" (1989) featuring Timothy Dalton as Bond.  I don't like Timothy Dalton as Bond.  I think he would make a better Leisure Suit Larry, but that's just my opinion.  What do you think?

Still having cat issues

Hi Honey!  Did you have a good day today?  I slept in today, woke up at 10 am.  Wow!  I don't do that often, it's the fasting month.  But I did have a lot of chores to do, good thing it rained yesterday so I didn't have to water the plants.  I'm still having cat issues.  I didn't have the time to go shopping for cat food until the evening.  Meanwhile, I still had to feed Floofy so put the solid food in the grinder, drenched it with water, and served it to her.  It was acceptable, but it remains to be seen what it will do to her tummy.  Sensitive eaters.  As for Luka, well...  there is a slight improvement but I'm still worried.  Time will tell.

Hey Natty Honey!  How are you feeling?  I wish I could be there with you, but this is the situation God has given us.  We must do the best we can.  "Play the cards we're dealt" so to speak.  I do hope you are feeling well.  But don't worry so much.  Have fun with what you got, everything will turn out just fine.  InshaAllah.

Cat issues

Hi Honey!  How was your day today?  I hope everything went great for you.  I had a few cat issues today.  First off, the nearest supermarket ran out of the ONLY canned cat food that Floofy likes, but they had the same flavor in pouches, so I bought 4 of those thinking that it would be satisfactory.  It turned out that it was not satisfactory when mixed with rice.  It's raining right now, and I won't have another opportunity to go shopping until tomorrow evening.  Packed schedule, yeah.  Wish my wallet were as packed as my schedule.  Then Luka's butt got swollen from being licked too much.  She does that when she goes in heat, but this time she took it too far, and I had to slap the restraining collar on her.  After a day of wiping and disinfecting with rubbing alcohol, the bubble burst just now and I was able too squeeze the pus out into the floor drain.  Yuck, right?  A doctor's work is never finished.  Then I had to patch a fuel leak in the engine blower.  Well it's not a cat, but it's sitting upright on my kitchen counter top and I can't move it until the glue sets up.  So I can't start my dinner yet, and breaking fast is about an hour.  After this letter, I'll move the thing and start cooking inshaAllah.

Hi Natty Honey!  That's a beautiful poetic snapshot you took there.  At first glance, one would think that it was an assignment you were writing there but it's single spaced.  I took a lot of English classes in college, but I didn't excel as well as I could have in them even though I wanted to.  I wasn't really connected to my emotions I guess, and my sense of humor back then was crude.  I don't really joke around much anymore.  My Mom doesn't laugh at my jokes anymore either.  How did life get so serious?  I do take your emotions seriously.  Yours are mine, we are all together.  We are the walrus.

Oh well

The same goes for you Erin: get a ring, put it on the ring finger of your left hand, and tell people you are engaged to be married, and I will repay you inshaAllah.  I'm just taking a leap of faith here Honey, I hope you will too.  Because I love you.

Natty Honey, the computer wants you to watch 2 movies today.  Why not waste some time.

Dear Natalie

Oh I get it, Natty: that boy is madly in love with you.  It's so obvious!  He's not the only one, I'm afraid.  There are countless more hiding out of your sight who have the same feelings for you.  I warned you about this.  What I want you to do is put a ring on the ring finger of your left hand (I will repay you inshaAllah), and tell him (and others) that you are engaged to be married.  Since this is true, there should be no guilt or deception in your heart about this.  Show them this letter if you must.  For heaven's sake, hide your beauty!  When you are around boys, wear loose jeans and T-shirt/sweatshirt.

But the real issue is that you are sexually aroused.  Can you hold your lust in until we are married?  Marriage is serious business, Natty.  If you make just ONE mistake in the matter of chastity, then I cannot marry you.  Since this is a marriage in the Public Eye, you won't be able to hide the mistake.  Everyone will know.  People reading this will laugh, but it's not a joke.  Lust is blood.  Lust creates children, so lust is blood.  What you need is to be married.  Talk to your Mom about this matter, whether you should keep my commitment to you (and yours to me), or go ahead and give in to your lust ASAP.  She would probably tell you that you have earned enough money by yourself and will earn more money by yourself and that you don't need me.  If this is true, then you have nothing to worry about.  But if it is not true, then I cannot endorse you if you are not my wife.

What I want you to do is stay away from boys!  Hold your lust in, keep your chastity, and wait until we are married.  We will marry, inshaAllah.  Have faith in us.  Pray.

Hi Honey

How are you feeling today?  Is everything going nice and easy for you?  I hope it is so.  Nothing special to report today, just keeping the same routine, and doing my best to be good at it.  I don't normally do crime busting analyses like yesterday.  I'm just trying to master the Qur'an, that's all.  I did harvest some mangoes today.  So many army ants!  I made an extra long noose on a bamboo pole to pull the fruit down from the high branches.  A wire noose is much lighter than a hook, so I can use the pole with one hand.  I can't let the fruit hit the stone, though.  It will smash or split, and become useless.  I will be breaking fast with ramen noodles today.  Oh, I miss my daily bowl of ramen so much!  I'll be having that, and ripe mangoes.  Yum!  Alhamdulillah.

Hi Natty Honey!  How's it going in your world today?  Please have tons of fun.  Take care of your precious body, and don't forget to pray.  I know you don't like people gossiping about you, but nowadays they are simply talking about how beautiful you are.  And you are!  Just be cool, stay humble.