Letter to Julia 20140318

In the name of Allah, most Gracious, most Merciful.

Hello there, my dearest Julia and Erin!  Mwah!  Mwah!  MMMMuuuuuWAH!!!  Yeah, it's still my week of isolation, but it looks like I just can't tear myself away from my beloved.  I love you, I love you, so much and with all my heart.  I wish you were hear with me.  You are so beautiful, I long to be married to you, and be with you always.

So what's the news?  It's just the same old same old around here.  I had beef and potato curry with home made flat bread for dinner.  It was that sirloin I bought the other day.  It turned out to be fattier than I anticipated.  Yummy!  It's almost like beef and potato stew, except that it's curry.  Want some?  There's some construction going on at my Mom's house, and there's a lot of extra tile and rock that might be put to use.  Like raising the ground floor over at Casa de Julia up higher above the potential flood level.  Floofy finally got herself inseminated, inshaAllah.  It was that handsome greyish-brown tomcat with long, striped legs.  He's got blue eyes!  I want those kittens.  Ya Allah, please make them beautiful, healthy and happy.  It finally rained.  No, it's not weather distortion: it's supposed to be the dry season now.  My cooler was bleeding a few days ago.  No, it wasn't from any meats inside the cooler.  I checked.  MashaAllah, I seem to attract ghosts.  You both had better be prepared for the supernatural when you marry me, inshaAllah.  I'll teach you the proper incantations, inshaAllah.  The most basic is, "I seek refuge with Allah from Satan, the rejected."  Now I'm watching the Victoria's Secret fashion show 2000 on Shadowplay TV.  Oh my God!  Doesn't this station play anything else?  It should be renamed "The Victoria's Secret Channel".  But yeah, it's just the same old routine around here.  I love you, I love you.

Now please remember my dearest and precious wives, that the goal of our marriage is to slow down and raise a family.  Yes, it may be hectic and exciting right now, but you must not slide down into the abyss as quickly as the others.  YOU are the Rock and Roll Princess.  Slow down.  Make 'em wait for you.